Sometimes I'm ashamed of my lack of self-control, calmness and wisdom.
But then again, shouldn't be ashamed .. should convert it to inspiration to become better, I guess.
Anyway, here's the relevant part of the dreams last night:
I'm a cloud of consciousness, observing some sort of a desolate place. Six people have arrived there. Three of them torture the other three (one on one). Two of them remained within more-or-less reasonable limits. One of them, however, had given in to the lust of torturing with high voltage. I was upset about it, tuned into the victim and with anger, me + the guy reflected the arcs back. I wanted for the person to experience what they have caused the victim to experience (about an hour of electric shock). However, blinded by anger, I did not see that he was a lot weaker than his victim. For him, just a few minutes probably meant / would've meant coma. The dream was cut there. The next moment the place had turned into a crime scene. Some higher-ups tried to cover up what they still could.
Now who gave in to the lust of torturing with high voltage?
Saturday, January 17, 2015
Tuesday, January 13, 2015
Flying dream
A cool flying dream again last night. Slowly flew from the window of one apartment block to another (4th floors). It seemed pretty real until some glitches appeared, which gave away that it was a dream.
One of the university professors had an art exhibition (space and dimensions). Had wished to participate but somehow I was convinced I had already missed it (hadn't marked down the date nor time). Today I stumbled on it almost accidentally - judging by time, the gallery was supposed to be closed already. However, the professor's tour was still on-going and after that he made a lecture / presentation.
One of the university professors had an art exhibition (space and dimensions). Had wished to participate but somehow I was convinced I had already missed it (hadn't marked down the date nor time). Today I stumbled on it almost accidentally - judging by time, the gallery was supposed to be closed already. However, the professor's tour was still on-going and after that he made a lecture / presentation.
Sunday, January 11, 2015
Dusting old posts + some conspiracy
A great theory on vaccines and cancer:
Yesterday I sought for a few blog posts (blogger search still doesn't work properly) and read some of my old posts. Wow. I'm inspired by myself.
A friend of a friend of a friend of a friend posted a status update on Facebook. He described the old and familiar feelings of the fluids flowing in the central channel, the energy, lack of need for sleeping, eating, drinking and so on. I thank him for the inspiration.
Yesterday I practised the pranayama exercise again a little. Occasionally saw the room with my eyes closed, then I didn't then I did again (3rd eye yawning, yay).
Yesterday I sought for a few blog posts (blogger search still doesn't work properly) and read some of my old posts. Wow. I'm inspired by myself.
A friend of a friend of a friend of a friend posted a status update on Facebook. He described the old and familiar feelings of the fluids flowing in the central channel, the energy, lack of need for sleeping, eating, drinking and so on. I thank him for the inspiration.
Yesterday I practised the pranayama exercise again a little. Occasionally saw the room with my eyes closed, then I didn't then I did again (3rd eye yawning, yay).
Saturday, January 10, 2015
The great battle of Logical vs. Illogical mind
Ate late yesterday. Had trouble sleeping and in the dreams I was really tired.
There was an interesting scene in the dreams:
I was trying hard to sleep in "my room". I guess the weather was rather nice and sunny outside. Then suddenly wind blew in a lot of stuff through the windows (which I realized weren't real). Among the stuff, there were what seemed like tiny bugs, brown leaves. Then small birds started swooping into the room, trying to catch the bugs.
Recently I've realized something about life. It's far more fundamental than most scientists seem to think.
There was a SIM card for mobile internet left over. When father offered it to me a few weeks ago, I turned him down. Back then I came up with a lot of reasons why it wouldn't work (probably don't have the mobile broadband module, even if I had, linux wouldn't recognize it, yada yada). Pulled out the filler today morning, breaking the plastic ribbon that had probably been meant for getting the card back out. Pushed the card in and noticed that there was no ::click::, which means that I can't get the card out without disassembling the laptop. Now I don't have any excuses not to try to get it working anymore.. sigh.
Also, yesterday it turned out that again I've been swimming hard against the flow. The project that I decided to turn into management practice. It's not been progressing as well as I would want it to. However, subconscious points in the direction of waiting. My rational mind: "Wtf do I have to wait for, if we've already missed the deadline? Full steam ahead!" Well, yesterday it turned out there are higher level financial and management reasons why the current speed of progress is currently close to perfect.
There was an interesting scene in the dreams:
I was trying hard to sleep in "my room". I guess the weather was rather nice and sunny outside. Then suddenly wind blew in a lot of stuff through the windows (which I realized weren't real). Among the stuff, there were what seemed like tiny bugs, brown leaves. Then small birds started swooping into the room, trying to catch the bugs.
Recently I've realized something about life. It's far more fundamental than most scientists seem to think.
There was a SIM card for mobile internet left over. When father offered it to me a few weeks ago, I turned him down. Back then I came up with a lot of reasons why it wouldn't work (probably don't have the mobile broadband module, even if I had, linux wouldn't recognize it, yada yada). Pulled out the filler today morning, breaking the plastic ribbon that had probably been meant for getting the card back out. Pushed the card in and noticed that there was no ::click::, which means that I can't get the card out without disassembling the laptop. Now I don't have any excuses not to try to get it working anymore.. sigh.
Also, yesterday it turned out that again I've been swimming hard against the flow. The project that I decided to turn into management practice. It's not been progressing as well as I would want it to. However, subconscious points in the direction of waiting. My rational mind: "Wtf do I have to wait for, if we've already missed the deadline? Full steam ahead!" Well, yesterday it turned out there are higher level financial and management reasons why the current speed of progress is currently close to perfect.
Friday, January 9, 2015
Ego-dream
Last night I had several slightly awkward dreams. But before that I would like to mention a dream that I had during Christmas:
I was at the summerhouse .. caught a naughty hornet. Put it into a matchbox and decided to release it about a kilometre in a certain direction (to get it far enough from the bee hives). Started walking, but I was so tired that I passed out (no recollection of dreaming for some time). Woke up in a puddle of mud with the hornet matchbox in my left hand. Stood up and continued walking.
Something that I remember from the dreams last night:
I had taken a bus back from Italy. Forgot something on the bus, went after it. Apparently, the bus driver had been waiting for me to turn back and take it. Although he was in a hurry, it seemed as if we could borrow an eternity and we would still arrive on time, wherever we wanted to go.
I took a shortcut though an airfield or something (radars), then arrived in what I thought to be a shipyard. I was on my way onto a ship, when I met someone familiar. They asked me where I was headed. I told them and flew over the staircase railing. All the dream-training of parkour seems to have had its effect. Being really amazed, I guess I turned around and looked at myself flying over the railing or something. Or perhaps I had 360 degrees sight or something without being limited to my dream body at that moment.
Left through the door. There was no ship there. The building went on a lock-down, as a rocket with some sort of satellites was launched in the distance. Stopped and observed the spectacle. I thought: "wow, this looks a lot more fascinating than in reality." Infinite zoom, auto-tracking and monitoring of all the subsystems on the rocket .. it's so much better in the dream. After a while, the lock-down was lifted and people gathered outside, with happy faces .. congratulating each-other and so on.
I continued. Ran through another door and re-entered the building from the opposite wing. Some familiar faces felt proud that they were at a school like that.
Haven't actually witnessed a rocket launch in reality (with the exception watching it on the computer screen in a form of video recordings or live video feeds). While writing this, it occurred to me that there's a documentary of our efforts coming out.
Today everything fell. Felt quite clumsy after all this ego-dream.
I was at the summerhouse .. caught a naughty hornet. Put it into a matchbox and decided to release it about a kilometre in a certain direction (to get it far enough from the bee hives). Started walking, but I was so tired that I passed out (no recollection of dreaming for some time). Woke up in a puddle of mud with the hornet matchbox in my left hand. Stood up and continued walking.
Something that I remember from the dreams last night:
I had taken a bus back from Italy. Forgot something on the bus, went after it. Apparently, the bus driver had been waiting for me to turn back and take it. Although he was in a hurry, it seemed as if we could borrow an eternity and we would still arrive on time, wherever we wanted to go.
I took a shortcut though an airfield or something (radars), then arrived in what I thought to be a shipyard. I was on my way onto a ship, when I met someone familiar. They asked me where I was headed. I told them and flew over the staircase railing. All the dream-training of parkour seems to have had its effect. Being really amazed, I guess I turned around and looked at myself flying over the railing or something. Or perhaps I had 360 degrees sight or something without being limited to my dream body at that moment.
Left through the door. There was no ship there. The building went on a lock-down, as a rocket with some sort of satellites was launched in the distance. Stopped and observed the spectacle. I thought: "wow, this looks a lot more fascinating than in reality." Infinite zoom, auto-tracking and monitoring of all the subsystems on the rocket .. it's so much better in the dream. After a while, the lock-down was lifted and people gathered outside, with happy faces .. congratulating each-other and so on.
I continued. Ran through another door and re-entered the building from the opposite wing. Some familiar faces felt proud that they were at a school like that.
Haven't actually witnessed a rocket launch in reality (with the exception watching it on the computer screen in a form of video recordings or live video feeds). While writing this, it occurred to me that there's a documentary of our efforts coming out.
Today everything fell. Felt quite clumsy after all this ego-dream.
Sunday, January 4, 2015
One-way path
Realized the idea of the pranayama exercise that I had occasionally been practising. Purification. So, I enhanced it with visualization and breathed out some of the knots / blockages.
Started feeling & hearing the buzzing / pulsation of prana. Observed it and realized that I have a habit of casting stasis field on the heart. Undid the stasis .. ::plop::, a fluffy aura appears. Performed the same procedure in other areas where I couldn't see my aura. Previously I haven't paid much attention to it, but it's slightly lopsided (narrow around the feet and wide around the chest, head). Still focusing on my visualization of unconditional love.
Right after releasing the aura, it was quite dirty (black flames with a slight tint of various colours). Eventually it cleaned out. I boosted it for a moment, which increased awareness.
Couldn't sleep too well with all that energy buzzing through the body. Perhaps also because I had slept during the day as well.
In the first dream at about 2 or 3 AM, I was looking for an apartment somewhere not far from home (a bit awkward). I was about to walk past a rather expensive hotel that was too close to home, when I decided to still take a look at it. Instead of balconies, the building had a spiral ramp with plants and railing. Walked two storeys up (worried about trampling on the plants) but ended up at least hundreds of meters from the ground. The ramp went even higher. The view was awesome, but I wanted to take a look at other places also. The moment I turned back, the ramp had transformed into a slippery rod with parts of the railing missing. Started going down slowly, afraid of falling.
Basically this dream indicated the fear of losing what I've regained again. Fear of being unable to walk the path that I would want. Also, the dream indicates that I'm convinced that I can't afford the path. On the other hand, I'm very close to the path .. but it's a one-way path, so I either walk it or fall down again.
Started feeling & hearing the buzzing / pulsation of prana. Observed it and realized that I have a habit of casting stasis field on the heart. Undid the stasis .. ::plop::, a fluffy aura appears. Performed the same procedure in other areas where I couldn't see my aura. Previously I haven't paid much attention to it, but it's slightly lopsided (narrow around the feet and wide around the chest, head). Still focusing on my visualization of unconditional love.
Right after releasing the aura, it was quite dirty (black flames with a slight tint of various colours). Eventually it cleaned out. I boosted it for a moment, which increased awareness.
Couldn't sleep too well with all that energy buzzing through the body. Perhaps also because I had slept during the day as well.
In the first dream at about 2 or 3 AM, I was looking for an apartment somewhere not far from home (a bit awkward). I was about to walk past a rather expensive hotel that was too close to home, when I decided to still take a look at it. Instead of balconies, the building had a spiral ramp with plants and railing. Walked two storeys up (worried about trampling on the plants) but ended up at least hundreds of meters from the ground. The ramp went even higher. The view was awesome, but I wanted to take a look at other places also. The moment I turned back, the ramp had transformed into a slippery rod with parts of the railing missing. Started going down slowly, afraid of falling.
Basically this dream indicated the fear of losing what I've regained again. Fear of being unable to walk the path that I would want. Also, the dream indicates that I'm convinced that I can't afford the path. On the other hand, I'm very close to the path .. but it's a one-way path, so I either walk it or fall down again.
Saturday, January 3, 2015
Long audio-books on ETs
A lot of stuff has happened. A lot of manifestations, realizations, interesting dreams, etc. Thought I wouldn't post any of it, but then it occurred to me that I should post at least some of it .. which might be of interest for others.
Father discovered a long series of videos on the history of the atlanteans (260 of 1 hour videos in total, I guess):
Recognized a part of myself in there. This brought up a feeling of love that I had been missing for the past few years. Grabbed it and started focusing on it.
Michael Grubb's video(s) on his experience with extraterrestrials was also very very good:
Father discovered a long series of videos on the history of the atlanteans (260 of 1 hour videos in total, I guess):
Recognized a part of myself in there. This brought up a feeling of love that I had been missing for the past few years. Grabbed it and started focusing on it.
Michael Grubb's video(s) on his experience with extraterrestrials was also very very good:
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