It has been years since the last time I've had no fire to extinguish. I've been swamped under a heap of urgent tasks for the whole time.
Yesterday evening I had some free time and didn't know what to do about it. Stumbled upon an interesting paper, then started following the paper trail and got inspired. This: https://archive.org/details/CIA-RDP96-00792R000300370001-4
Decided to start enhancing the density of the psi field again.
Maintained the inspiration throughout the night and during the morning. Finished up with documentation and submitted, then sat down waiting for a meeting. No response. Well, no meeting. Now what? Re-checked all the tasks in issue tracking, checked all the e-mails, work-related chats. Now what? Ok, to another meeting. Became bored and started looking into a bonus work-related job that I could do as a hobby. A couple of hours later I finished with the research. Now what? In contrast to the prior years, this time life did not swamp me with further work. Thank you.
Got to re-learn how to relax properly (not just during the night).
Friday, September 29, 2017
Tuesday, September 26, 2017
Absurd
Had a dream where I was on a bus, sitting in one of the rear seats. Looked around and decided to take a shower. While it did seem like nobody cared, at some point the lady sitting in the next row slowly turned her head and looked at me. I just, you know, paused for a second and looked back at her, and then continued humming and scrubbing. Seriously, the most awkward dream thus far. Seemed strange already while dreaming it.
Wednesday, September 20, 2017
Dream: crappy hostel
Was on a bus. Some other dude was talking about a rumor that I lived in a lousy neighbourhood (big deal, right?). Did not pay attention to any of that, until we passed that place. An apartment there had my family name on it, so I left the bus and started looking around. "I've never even been here before, so I wonder who lives here."
Looked in through the windows in the first floor apartment. An exceptionally small room with barely any room to sit and meditate. Mom's backpack! From the outside the room looked like a normal 4-walled apartment room, just unsecure and exceptionally easy to enter. Entered. From the inside it looked like a tent made of blue trashbags. No doors or windows. The room still had an exit, though - a very small opening to crawl through. The opening was so small that one had to leave all belongings inside and crawl out. Didn't want to break anything so I left my backpack in there as well, and then crawled through the exit .. accidentally breaking some of the blue plastic. Actually, the plastic had already been torn from another place - suspected Mom had left through a wall.
A narrow corridor leading to a shared kitchen. Most of the people living there were somewhat low on culture - junkies and drunkards, mostly. Looked like an exceptionally humiliating place to live for a normal person. A serious test of the humble hermit in everyone of us (for spirituality and stuff).
Went upstairs. A more-or-less normal floor. Still plain walls, but at least painted with some crude details (as if to imitate a luxurious palace). A bar and some tables to play poker.
Next floor. Luxurious palace with gold-lined pillars and crystal chandeliers. I'm like "What? A bunch of thieves and junkies with just a stairway to this place?" That same dude (who had been chilling with me through the place) said something along the lines of "similar to a masonic lodge". No idea.
Looked in through the windows in the first floor apartment. An exceptionally small room with barely any room to sit and meditate. Mom's backpack! From the outside the room looked like a normal 4-walled apartment room, just unsecure and exceptionally easy to enter. Entered. From the inside it looked like a tent made of blue trashbags. No doors or windows. The room still had an exit, though - a very small opening to crawl through. The opening was so small that one had to leave all belongings inside and crawl out. Didn't want to break anything so I left my backpack in there as well, and then crawled through the exit .. accidentally breaking some of the blue plastic. Actually, the plastic had already been torn from another place - suspected Mom had left through a wall.
A narrow corridor leading to a shared kitchen. Most of the people living there were somewhat low on culture - junkies and drunkards, mostly. Looked like an exceptionally humiliating place to live for a normal person. A serious test of the humble hermit in everyone of us (for spirituality and stuff).
Went upstairs. A more-or-less normal floor. Still plain walls, but at least painted with some crude details (as if to imitate a luxurious palace). A bar and some tables to play poker.
Next floor. Luxurious palace with gold-lined pillars and crystal chandeliers. I'm like "What? A bunch of thieves and junkies with just a stairway to this place?" That same dude (who had been chilling with me through the place) said something along the lines of "similar to a masonic lodge". No idea.
Meta
Woke up and realized that one would probably progress from the first floor all the way to the top floor, while always being able to see the next floor for inspiration. A catalyst for spiritual progress.Tuesday, September 19, 2017
Pillar of smoke
Chest ached yesterday evening. Had caught cold. Lit an incense stick and walked around the rooms with it. Visualized it cleaning the lungs. Occasionally put it on a shelf, sat down a couple of meters away and stared at the smoke rising.
The smoke was very responsive to pk. Could easily lean it in different directions, calm it down (a straight line of smoke to the ceiling), make smoke rings with it, or cut the smoke (smoke started rolling off to the sides instead of going upwards). At some point I started trying to keep the smoke calm, while visualizing that the column of smoke is the central flame in my spinal column. This improved healing even further. Though, got a bit dizzy eventually (too much incense).
Felt much better the next day. Also, have been listening to heart chakra healing music for the past few days.
The smoke was very responsive to pk. Could easily lean it in different directions, calm it down (a straight line of smoke to the ceiling), make smoke rings with it, or cut the smoke (smoke started rolling off to the sides instead of going upwards). At some point I started trying to keep the smoke calm, while visualizing that the column of smoke is the central flame in my spinal column. This improved healing even further. Though, got a bit dizzy eventually (too much incense).
Felt much better the next day. Also, have been listening to heart chakra healing music for the past few days.
Monday, September 18, 2017
DreamSports
Mom had contacted sister to ask what's going on in the town. One of her old friends had complained about aircraft noises and dogs barking throughout the night. Neither me nor sister had noticed nothing of the sort.
First of all I find it strange that there would be aircraft noises during the night. Except for the helicopter post, it's very rare. Also, were these aircraft noises, then dogs typically wouldn't bark about it. Unless it was deafening (the dog at the summerhouse is traumatized by all the low-flying jets). Mom thought it was the magnetic storm, but again, we didn't see anything out of the ordinary.
A very rainy and stormy day.
First of all I find it strange that there would be aircraft noises during the night. Except for the helicopter post, it's very rare. Also, were these aircraft noises, then dogs typically wouldn't bark about it. Unless it was deafening (the dog at the summerhouse is traumatized by all the low-flying jets). Mom thought it was the magnetic storm, but again, we didn't see anything out of the ordinary.
Dream: Burning branches
Was at the summerhouse, piling up branches and burning them. Noticed that there was an older pile that did not burn so well. In fact, it had almost become extinguished. The pile had large tree stumps sticking out of the ashes. I could tell that there were still some glowing pieces of charcoal underneath, so I nudged one of the stumps a bit. Instead of catalyzing the burning, I managed to unleash 2-3 hornets. The hornets darted at my right palm and stung it. In order to escape the emerging cloud of hornets (because typically that's how it happens with wasps), I flew away. However, I was somewhat disappointed in the speed of flight. I was so slow that I had to push myself from tree branches and roof edges.Dream: Training
Some kind of a large stadium or field. Spent the rest of the night training with someone else. Trained strength, stamina, agility, concentration, etc. The dream deterioriated in the morning when more people started showing up. Eventually some guy thought he was the trainer and started bossing around. I realized that I didn't have proper shoes and clothes for the training. Spent the rest of the time sprinting around with parkour while looking for them. Found them where I had placed them before the night of training (had just put them aside because they weren't needed). The boss trainer of the morning did not tolerate people training without flashy outfits.Morning walk
Walked to the bus station again. Felt lightweight and tireless. Walked a lot faster than usual and made it on the bus that leaves earlier, with perfect timing.A very rainy and stormy day.
Sunday, September 17, 2017
Moody Weather
Mayhaps not as exciting as the previous two posts but weather was a bit moody today.
Concentrated on work while listening to soothing music. At some moment I looked out of the balcony window and it was a sunshine with clear sky. Some time later I got confused about the raining backdrop in a song. It sounded so realistic that I looked at the balcony window and removed the headphones. Although it was actually raining outside, I couldn't have heard it with the headphones on. The song ended and it was sunny again. Stared at the fidget spinner for some time, heard a loud gust of wind. Looked out .. barely any wind. Took a nap and woke up. Cloudy but cleared up in just a few seconds. Then sunshine until sunset.
Managed to fool the cat so that he let me install the leash (about 10% success rate). With effort, managed to take the cat for a walk. Kept staring at the cat while it was trying to hide under a tree. As the darkness settled, at some point there was an empathic connection with the cat. He finally enjoyed sitting there, looking around .. feeling like a ninja or something. Though, it's still evident that the cat doesn't read my mind properly. Took the cat back home and left for shopping. Cat was confused "Do I need to come too or not?" He has a miss/fear relationship to r/outside so I knew I would no longer have to shoo him from the door today.
Concentrated on work while listening to soothing music. At some moment I looked out of the balcony window and it was a sunshine with clear sky. Some time later I got confused about the raining backdrop in a song. It sounded so realistic that I looked at the balcony window and removed the headphones. Although it was actually raining outside, I couldn't have heard it with the headphones on. The song ended and it was sunny again. Stared at the fidget spinner for some time, heard a loud gust of wind. Looked out .. barely any wind. Took a nap and woke up. Cloudy but cleared up in just a few seconds. Then sunshine until sunset.
Managed to fool the cat so that he let me install the leash (about 10% success rate). With effort, managed to take the cat for a walk. Kept staring at the cat while it was trying to hide under a tree. As the darkness settled, at some point there was an empathic connection with the cat. He finally enjoyed sitting there, looking around .. feeling like a ninja or something. Though, it's still evident that the cat doesn't read my mind properly. Took the cat back home and left for shopping. Cat was confused "Do I need to come too or not?" He has a miss/fear relationship to r/outside so I knew I would no longer have to shoo him from the door today.
Saturday, September 16, 2017
Vague
Yesterday I randomly remembered remembering flashbacks of something. Yep.
I remember years of studying something involving strings of small dots of light. While I think they had colors as well, for me colors were irrelevant. It was the patterns and the interaction of these patterns that was important. More important than anything else (pffamily or whatever).
I think I remembered this either while taking a bus over a bridge and seeing dots of light reflect from the channel. Definitely I was thinking about this memory when walking to a store in the dark with Mom, Dad and sister. Was a few years old.
If that's a glimpse of a past life, then my tendencies and habits in this life make sense. Still suspicious, though.
I remember years of studying something involving strings of small dots of light. While I think they had colors as well, for me colors were irrelevant. It was the patterns and the interaction of these patterns that was important. More important than anything else (pffamily or whatever).
I think I remembered this either while taking a bus over a bridge and seeing dots of light reflect from the channel. Definitely I was thinking about this memory when walking to a store in the dark with Mom, Dad and sister. Was a few years old.
Meta
If that's a glimpse of a past life, then my tendencies and habits in this life make sense. Still suspicious, though.
Shrine
Couldn't sleep properly on Thursday night. There had been 6+ hours of emotional lessons learned discussion. I wasted my breath a lot, whereas the dude sitting opposite to me meditated for most of the time and rarely spoke anything. During the discussion, mindfulness meditation was mentioned once. Though, to me it seemed rather out of place so I did not comment on it. Moreover, since an ex-colleague mentioned on having had meditative coding experience(s) and found mindfulness meditation to be unexpectedly easy, I decided to save it for inspiration. He's the one I recommended meditation for overcoming his health condition and I'm glad he's better.
Oh, and before the discussion I scanned some documents at home, and read some old Japan tourism booklets while the scanner was working.
Anyway, that night I focused the consciousness cloud into the shape of my body. This started healing some areas previously scarce of attention. Then sister came home (around 2 AM), started moving stuff and cursing me. I think I fell asleep somewhere between 4 AM and 5 AM. Woke up confused about the orientation of the bed (rotated in respect to the body, I think). Checked the clock, but since it showed something like 7:69 or whatever (something illogical with a 7, don't remember exactly), I stood up and went to the living-room to check the time. Noticed that movement was very OBE-like (couldn't walk, had to float & fly). Dad was there, at the computer (pretty much only happens in dreams). Asked him what time it was, because it felt as if I was somewhere outside normal space-time. I think he looked at his watch and then ended up looking confused. "We're somewhere outside normal space-time, right?" It seemed as if he agreed.
Tried to remember what it was that I had on my list of things to do whenever I get an OBE. Aborted the operation with a 10 second timeout, roughly. Just "left the scene". Arrived at a place that looked like a Shinto Shrine. Saw my surroundings in 4D. At the same place there was the shrine, some kind of ruins, and an urban area with poor population. Climbed the ruins and looked towards the shrine tower (simultaneously a building). I was a bit surprised that the urban area was empty during the day. Well, empty with an exception. There was a lady on the 3rd floor (I think), cooking. To me it seemed that she had two kids who were not home. She saw me through the window / door and asked me to come and help her. She had the impression that I was lost, even though I was pretty sure that I wasn't .. I was just aimlessly wandering around, looking for whatever I might find interesting. Flew in and helped her with the cooking somehow (don't really remember the details). The food was somehow special and she offered it to me as well (couldn't try regular food anyway). Though, most importantly, she told me something about my history and asked my grandma to fill out the details for me.
Poofed to wherever grandma was. A large field of grass with some kind of a building, next to a gravel road. Did not recognize the place. Anyway, had a lengthy discussion about history (don't remember the details).
But then again, it just seems to imply that.
A very interesting dream / OBE in any case. One of a kind thus far.
Oh, and before the discussion I scanned some documents at home, and read some old Japan tourism booklets while the scanner was working.
OBE-ish dream
Anyway, that night I focused the consciousness cloud into the shape of my body. This started healing some areas previously scarce of attention. Then sister came home (around 2 AM), started moving stuff and cursing me. I think I fell asleep somewhere between 4 AM and 5 AM. Woke up confused about the orientation of the bed (rotated in respect to the body, I think). Checked the clock, but since it showed something like 7:69 or whatever (something illogical with a 7, don't remember exactly), I stood up and went to the living-room to check the time. Noticed that movement was very OBE-like (couldn't walk, had to float & fly). Dad was there, at the computer (pretty much only happens in dreams). Asked him what time it was, because it felt as if I was somewhere outside normal space-time. I think he looked at his watch and then ended up looking confused. "We're somewhere outside normal space-time, right?" It seemed as if he agreed.
Tried to remember what it was that I had on my list of things to do whenever I get an OBE. Aborted the operation with a 10 second timeout, roughly. Just "left the scene". Arrived at a place that looked like a Shinto Shrine. Saw my surroundings in 4D. At the same place there was the shrine, some kind of ruins, and an urban area with poor population. Climbed the ruins and looked towards the shrine tower (simultaneously a building). I was a bit surprised that the urban area was empty during the day. Well, empty with an exception. There was a lady on the 3rd floor (I think), cooking. To me it seemed that she had two kids who were not home. She saw me through the window / door and asked me to come and help her. She had the impression that I was lost, even though I was pretty sure that I wasn't .. I was just aimlessly wandering around, looking for whatever I might find interesting. Flew in and helped her with the cooking somehow (don't really remember the details). The food was somehow special and she offered it to me as well (couldn't try regular food anyway). Though, most importantly, she told me something about my history and asked my grandma to fill out the details for me.
Poofed to wherever grandma was. A large field of grass with some kind of a building, next to a gravel road. Did not recognize the place. Anyway, had a lengthy discussion about history (don't remember the details).
Meta
This seems to imply that I still am a part of the family lineage even though I don't feel like it. To me it seems like a boring lineage. While perhaps a bit more interesting than the average but still.But then again, it just seems to imply that.
A very interesting dream / OBE in any case. One of a kind thus far.
Epilogue
Had had perhaps 3 or 4 hours of sleep. Contrary to my expectations, I did not wake tired.Wednesday, September 13, 2017
Buzzing
Came home and straight to bed yesterday. Woke, ate, checked forums and back to bed.
When relaxed, there's a subtle buzzing all over the body, as if the body were purring like a cat. Pain and tension is released from the areas that are buzzing.
Last night I spent cleaning the body of stress and tension again. In the dream I created / found a garage-like room behind 5 portals. It had other portals as well, but through these it was even more difficult to find the place. Somehow I let the place clear itself of unfavourable entities, then entered. The place was dark but clean and quiet. Set up work stuff .. a nice place to work in dreams without distractions. Though, without the entities the place was no longer as stable. Noticed several inconsistencies (stuff missing) while packing for the morning alarm.
When relaxed, there's a subtle buzzing all over the body, as if the body were purring like a cat. Pain and tension is released from the areas that are buzzing.
Last night I spent cleaning the body of stress and tension again. In the dream I created / found a garage-like room behind 5 portals. It had other portals as well, but through these it was even more difficult to find the place. Somehow I let the place clear itself of unfavourable entities, then entered. The place was dark but clean and quiet. Set up work stuff .. a nice place to work in dreams without distractions. Though, without the entities the place was no longer as stable. Noticed several inconsistencies (stuff missing) while packing for the morning alarm.
Saturday, September 9, 2017
Compassion to electronics
Ever played skip a rock with keyboards on a sea of old TVs and CRT displays?
I did, and felt bad about it. Threw away a lot of old electronics. They have served me well but how did they earn such a treatment? Came home and watched Animatrix (hadn't seen it before). Rage against the machines, then revenge of the machines. Although a bit random, I think it's very good. Found the runner and the haunted house stories the most inspiring.
Last night I had a bright dream with very disturbing content. Reference to the movie "The Beach," I think. A ferry brought people to some kind of an island. It was well known that the island is dangerous, so I observed my own actions carefully, trying to adapt to the surroundings quickly. The dream ended when I had finished installing the shoes. No point in describing the graphic content around me, just that people were really careless and ended up being hurt or killed. "The Beach" was in my opinion one of the most realistic movies out there, at least plot-wise. Don't know why the dream, though. Watched the movie like a month ago or something.
Before the dream, I had been staring at the singing bowls, trying to make them vibrate with the mind. Did not happen but got a good concentration training out of it.
I did, and felt bad about it. Threw away a lot of old electronics. They have served me well but how did they earn such a treatment? Came home and watched Animatrix (hadn't seen it before). Rage against the machines, then revenge of the machines. Although a bit random, I think it's very good. Found the runner and the haunted house stories the most inspiring.
Last night I had a bright dream with very disturbing content. Reference to the movie "The Beach," I think. A ferry brought people to some kind of an island. It was well known that the island is dangerous, so I observed my own actions carefully, trying to adapt to the surroundings quickly. The dream ended when I had finished installing the shoes. No point in describing the graphic content around me, just that people were really careless and ended up being hurt or killed. "The Beach" was in my opinion one of the most realistic movies out there, at least plot-wise. Don't know why the dream, though. Watched the movie like a month ago or something.
Before the dream, I had been staring at the singing bowls, trying to make them vibrate with the mind. Did not happen but got a good concentration training out of it.
Thursday, September 7, 2017
Mansion with a trolley
Read a reddit post about an old mansion becoming embedded into an office building yesterday evening.
Had a dream where I leaped off a skyscraper and flew to a nearby lake. Hadn't flown for a while (and didn't feel all too confident), so I aimed at the closest one. Landed somewhere on the street, and went exploring. A nice sunset over buildings with sandstone walls. Narrow alleys and small stores with neon lights and lit advertisements. I think I found a park with an old mansion converted into a museum. It was open, so I entered. I was busy observing the architectural details when an old friend greeted me. Haven't seen him for a long time. I commented that the architecture of the place is unusual. He nodded and said that the mansion actually consists of two buildings, while sketching a simple map onto the wall with his index finger. Logically, the buildings should be interconnected somehow, he said. I proposed that perhaps there's a small underground trolley between the two buildings. Somehow it seemed very typical, although I haven't seen such solutions in the waking life. I think he temporarily removed some parts of the floor or something, which revealed a low tunnel with a simple trolley. He did not want to test the trolley, afraid of an ambush on the other side (he has a military background). Learning everything he wanted to know about the place, he disappeared. So, I started putting back the removed pieces of the floor. A lady walked past the doorway, saying "Dear Lord" or something. I think she indicated how rude it had been of me to destroy the floor at the museum. In any case, the dream environment was not very stable anymore (things kept changing), and I guess that the museum was actually nowhere near the place with the skyscraper because the events happened during a cloudy day.
It's nice to randomly bump into old acquaintances whom I haven't even thought about for years.
Had a dream where I leaped off a skyscraper and flew to a nearby lake. Hadn't flown for a while (and didn't feel all too confident), so I aimed at the closest one. Landed somewhere on the street, and went exploring. A nice sunset over buildings with sandstone walls. Narrow alleys and small stores with neon lights and lit advertisements. I think I found a park with an old mansion converted into a museum. It was open, so I entered. I was busy observing the architectural details when an old friend greeted me. Haven't seen him for a long time. I commented that the architecture of the place is unusual. He nodded and said that the mansion actually consists of two buildings, while sketching a simple map onto the wall with his index finger. Logically, the buildings should be interconnected somehow, he said. I proposed that perhaps there's a small underground trolley between the two buildings. Somehow it seemed very typical, although I haven't seen such solutions in the waking life. I think he temporarily removed some parts of the floor or something, which revealed a low tunnel with a simple trolley. He did not want to test the trolley, afraid of an ambush on the other side (he has a military background). Learning everything he wanted to know about the place, he disappeared. So, I started putting back the removed pieces of the floor. A lady walked past the doorway, saying "Dear Lord" or something. I think she indicated how rude it had been of me to destroy the floor at the museum. In any case, the dream environment was not very stable anymore (things kept changing), and I guess that the museum was actually nowhere near the place with the skyscraper because the events happened during a cloudy day.
It's nice to randomly bump into old acquaintances whom I haven't even thought about for years.
Tuesday, September 5, 2017
Math of projected realities
A dream where I was shown Saturn (I think), then some kind of futuristic spacetech labs, some kind of a planet surface with its multitude of projected realities / dimensions / parallel universes.
Flew towards the Saturn-like planet through space. Flew perhaps a 90 degree arc around it to get a glimpse of the area in the shadow as well. I think it was either an animation or with heavy overlay, because there was something brown between the ring and upper atmosphere. Probably a highlight to illustrate something that I could not comprehend.
The guide was explaining something about future space probes sent to Saturn. He then walked me past some sort of labs, which looked like 20 or 30 years into the future. Heavily automated with robotics but otherwise still looked fairly similar.
I was then shown around on the surface of a planet. While there were some kind of bases (artificial light sources) on the planet, this was not what the guide wanted to show me. Everything looked weird .. saw things in 4D. It looked as if there were some specific regions where different 3D realms were intersecting as if projected together from different projectors. It was evening / night, so there was barely any light. Everything looked dark brown, rocks and dust everywhere. Then these artificial sources of light in the distance, surrounded by what looked like blurry jets (upper atmospheric lightning) spreading in very specific angles in 4D space. It looked as if the intersection points were aligned to a planetary grid of some sort.
Being brought back to a room with three other people (I think), one guy asked what it was that I learned. Embarrassed, I tried to come up with some kind of an analogy. Not a very good one, and don't even remember it anymore. The guy commented: "Man, you have an awful memory." Me, slightly frustrated: "Well, thank you for the compliment." The guy then showed me a lot of papers with a lot of mathematical concepts and formulae. Without using that kind of math for a great many years by now, I felt embarrassed again. So, the dream ended in being taught "basic" math. Argh. Sigh. I wish were adequate in these things. Might learn something interesting or practical.
Flew towards the Saturn-like planet through space. Flew perhaps a 90 degree arc around it to get a glimpse of the area in the shadow as well. I think it was either an animation or with heavy overlay, because there was something brown between the ring and upper atmosphere. Probably a highlight to illustrate something that I could not comprehend.
The guide was explaining something about future space probes sent to Saturn. He then walked me past some sort of labs, which looked like 20 or 30 years into the future. Heavily automated with robotics but otherwise still looked fairly similar.
I was then shown around on the surface of a planet. While there were some kind of bases (artificial light sources) on the planet, this was not what the guide wanted to show me. Everything looked weird .. saw things in 4D. It looked as if there were some specific regions where different 3D realms were intersecting as if projected together from different projectors. It was evening / night, so there was barely any light. Everything looked dark brown, rocks and dust everywhere. Then these artificial sources of light in the distance, surrounded by what looked like blurry jets (upper atmospheric lightning) spreading in very specific angles in 4D space. It looked as if the intersection points were aligned to a planetary grid of some sort.
Being brought back to a room with three other people (I think), one guy asked what it was that I learned. Embarrassed, I tried to come up with some kind of an analogy. Not a very good one, and don't even remember it anymore. The guy commented: "Man, you have an awful memory." Me, slightly frustrated: "Well, thank you for the compliment." The guy then showed me a lot of papers with a lot of mathematical concepts and formulae. Without using that kind of math for a great many years by now, I felt embarrassed again. So, the dream ended in being taught "basic" math. Argh. Sigh. I wish were adequate in these things. Might learn something interesting or practical.
Monday, September 4, 2017
Good day
Reading the dialogue boosted the internal heat for me. Boosted it further, then went to sleep. Couldn't sleep. Just a few shallow dreams but spent most of the night healing and boosting internal heat.
This reminded me of the dream I had had the previous night.
On a different level, I had read the first few chapters of the thought yoga book. It went into great detail on how to influence people and push one's agenda on them. I saw that the religious man has some serious issues himself. While he means well, he's partially blinded by the tension in his own mind. I wish him all the best.
This reminded me of the dream I had had the previous night.
Tension doesn't burn
Me and youngest uncle cleaning the old barn house. There were some kind of wooden ribs on the floor. Uncle asked me to clean the floor. I figured I could just burn the wood or something. Don't ask .. dream logic or something. Took a matchstick and as I put it closer to the wood, the flame was blown out. Realized that karma does not burn lightly. One needs constant strong heat to even melt it. So, I just removed the wooden ribs and threw them out.Book exchange
Exchanged yoga books with a colleague. She got the dream and sleep yoga book. I got a thought yoga book. Wanted to ask about a dream that I had in 2010, I think. In that dream she was driving her dad's van (Blogger search is not very helpful). She answered the question without me asking. She said she was going for driving school. So, probably she has not had the dream yet.Preaching
Her father was kind enough to take me to the largest shopping mall in town. Took the chance to buy new shoes. The first candidate often still ends up being the best. Went outside to wait for a free bus to town centre. A nice chilly and windy evening. Noticed some glass shards on the ground (dangerous) and tried to steer clear of these, especially with the new shoes and all. 15+ min into waiting, a dude showed up and introduced himself. Being strongly religious, he started telling about Free Will and Adam's & Eve's temptation (which is what I read yesterday evening). He had a very young son with him, who did not enjoy his dad's preaching much. Anyway, the man held my hand and prayed for me (felt some kind of a vibration move through his palm). He also wished for me to find a girlfriend this month. I'm not sure I would want that (his son also started crying on that). When he saw that my bus arrived, he asked me to visit their Facebook page and perhaps continue the chat. In order to make room for the people rushing on the bus, I took a step back .. onto the glass shards. Thanks for the symbol, won't visit the Facebook page (dangerous). These kinds of people are very sticky, so it's wiser to just thank him and send energy astrally.On a different level, I had read the first few chapters of the thought yoga book. It went into great detail on how to influence people and push one's agenda on them. I saw that the religious man has some serious issues himself. While he means well, he's partially blinded by the tension in his own mind. I wish him all the best.
Singing bowls
A few days ago I tried the singing bowls again and realized something obvious. Probably the correct way to use a singing bowl is to visualize it being one of your chakras, and then make it vibrate. One of those bowls on the heart chakra caused a few flashes of light and boosted the internal flame quite a bit (cleared some of the soot off the psi channels). Flashes of yellowish white light I've seen several times per day recently.Sunday, September 3, 2017
Blown chance
A very good read on the broader perspective:
https://www.scribd.com/document/13165990/Dialogue-With-Hidden-Hand-Self-Proclaimed-Illuminati-Insider
Before 2012, there were a lot of people and entities helping me. I took a long time to decide, then decided to stay (especially after seeing how biased I had become of the spiritual level of people around). I became ill (perhaps due to the uncertainty and doubt in my decision) and recovered later. A chance of leaving together with old friends .. while leaving this body behind. Then at some moment, I felt really happy for the progress in something that I had also helped in. At that point, I couldn't wrap my mind around it. Seemed totally random.
Then I guess it became more silent, in addition to the constant feeling of having lost a great part of myself. Left alone. It seems that in the daily life everything fractally reflects on that. On one hand, I love being left alone (makes it easier to recover and evolve at unnatural rates), on the other hand I also feel disgusted about it. But then again, I've been circling the same karmic cycle throughout this life. Got to overcome loneliness and become enlightened together with the body.
Actually, even before 2012 I felt like having been born too late (a lot of old friends already gone).
https://www.scribd.com/document/13165990/Dialogue-With-Hidden-Hand-Self-Proclaimed-Illuminati-Insider
Thoughts
Before 2012, there were a lot of people and entities helping me. I took a long time to decide, then decided to stay (especially after seeing how biased I had become of the spiritual level of people around). I became ill (perhaps due to the uncertainty and doubt in my decision) and recovered later. A chance of leaving together with old friends .. while leaving this body behind. Then at some moment, I felt really happy for the progress in something that I had also helped in. At that point, I couldn't wrap my mind around it. Seemed totally random.
Then I guess it became more silent, in addition to the constant feeling of having lost a great part of myself. Left alone. It seems that in the daily life everything fractally reflects on that. On one hand, I love being left alone (makes it easier to recover and evolve at unnatural rates), on the other hand I also feel disgusted about it. But then again, I've been circling the same karmic cycle throughout this life. Got to overcome loneliness and become enlightened together with the body.
Actually, even before 2012 I felt like having been born too late (a lot of old friends already gone).
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