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The goal of this blog is to motivate myself and others for further practice as well as provide details that might explain what's going on..


Monday, February 27, 2012

A door-open .. almost

Woke up 4 AM to board a train. I was moving down the stairs of the 1st floor of the apartment block. It was dark, with the only light emanating from a LED indicator on a light switch on the wall. When I was about to reach for the door handle, the door budged. Just as if someone tried to open it without pushing the handle down first. There was nobody around and I didn't hear any wind at that time. Nice one =]. Would've been more fun if the handle would've gone down also - could've scored my first door-open geist / pk attempt.

It was warm and slushy, so my boots got wet, clothes sweaty and I guess I caught some extra cold while waiting. Well, the body doesn't generate enough heat when it has been in stand-by for about 3 hours. Time for healing yet again =|.

Tried some pk on a padlock .. no movement though.

A lot of synchronicities, micro-pk and predictions. Like someone says my name .. poof and I'm there. Or I count down from 3 and the event happens as predicted. A fun day, but I could use some more meditation and get some sleep.

Sunday, February 26, 2012

Vacation

Meditated, slept in a half-dream state and watching videos was about all that I did during this vacation.

Tried Trataka on the mirror again. Saw the faces of different egos coming off.

Attempted OBE once, too. However, I can't call it too successful. For most of the time, I seriously lack the motivation to practice it.

Watched the videos of Illuminati Initiate Intro by Illumicorp. Found it interesting how it stimulated the lower chakras. From these Illuminati videos, I got the feeling that this organization has its roots before the Medieval times when the witches were pursued. The ideology seemed to be pretty deeply ingrained into the society. They have neatly managed to guarantee that there won't be many of them and that they could cleanse the world from a safe zone.

Focused on sending them love and empathy so that they would see the glory of this world instead of demolishing it. This method seemed to have worked for Egypt at least (the number of explosions and deaths decreased).

Edit: Interesting, how sometimes I make mistakes, but it appears as if I didn't. Like clicking with the wrong mouse button, but the effect is still what I wanted. Or clearly painting beyond the borders in GIMP, without the brush leaving a mark there. Neat.

It seems that healing the chest area for an hour helped. The area feels calmer now and I feel more peaceful too. Filled the area with a green fog, whereas green would symbolize healing. Asked around in myself, looking for the tension and insecurities that might cause the area to feel blocked and cold. Attempted to solve the problems and visualized dissolving the blockages.

Friday, February 24, 2012

Home

Arrived at the 1st home, feeling energized when I entered. The constructs that pump psi around are working amazingly well.

Father had found the material of Dr. Jonathan Reed, so we watched some of the videos. It's an interesting story on an alien contact.

Meditated and slept in a half-dream state a lot.

Tuesday, February 21, 2012

What a day

Interesting, tech just malfunctioned today.

Well, lamp flickers and music radio station crashes are pretty common (roughly 3 times a day).
But having the wireless accesspoint and router malfunctioning, the partitions of 2 harddrives messed up and a PC infected with malware .. that's a bit much for a day. Remembered that there was even more electronics that didn't work today, throwing weird errors and stuff.

It's quite hot and windy today.

Some self-inquiry

With temperature becoming warmer and birds singing, it feels like it's time to wake up from a winter sleep.

I'm guilty of not watching the videos that Owltwelve has posted in his journal. So, I decided to watch one. Which one would be the most efficient? "Take the last one," the subconscious mind replied.
Really enjoyed it. Started to analyze my mind more again. Haven't done this for a long time now. Instantly started to remember my dreams better.

Yesterday was an interesting day for self-inquiry. A lot of fuss and no-one understood me no matter how clearly I tried to convey it. Felt pretty alienated. Ego almost had no power and kept being beaten by what was happening around me. There's quite a crowd in my mind, different egos fighting and arguing, trying to drive the others out.

While focusing on the image of emptiness as closely as I could remember it, it gradually became warmer in my chest and throat areas. No wonder I had pneumonia, it seems like a wonder I'm still alive. The body was so cold in the chest.

Cheered up some yesterday evening. The dreams were amazingly vivid. I think I was more lucid also. Remember comparing the details of the dream to my memories of "the reality". Well, I always do that, though, this time it was more intense.

Sunday, February 19, 2012

Windy night

Focused on the higher chakras and on the density of the psi field before going to bed.

Tried to open my 3rd eye by visualizing pulling psi out from it and then pushing it back with pressure. Repeated this for a few times. After that it felt as if a slight breeze of wind was blowing through the forehead.

Had extraordinarily gloomy dreams. In one of them, we were in a bunker and targeted by artillery. Woke up at 2.30 AM to find that the bed was slightly shaking in some sort of banging noises that propagated through the whole building. It was strong wind playing on the roof.

Attempted to calm the wind down, but the response seemed to be very slow.

Repetitive snapping geist in the morning again.

Travel fair

Visited a travel fair with grandfather yesterday. A lot of papers with questions were given. Slightly hesitated to write on them, as they select winners from everyone who has contributed to their surveys. Well, it wouldn't hurt to win something, but what would I do with an evening at a restaurant for 2, a free trip to some other country or a ticket for speeding on rally tracks. I wouldn't have anyone to go with anyway; I'm still in service; I don't like speeding.

It was quite crowded there and after I had visited all the boxes, I couldn't locate grandfather anymore. Attempted to use a sort of psi-radar to locate him, but when I arrived at the place, I couldn't see him there. Tried a guiding construct as well, but still no success. So I called him instead, which worked on the 2nd attempt.

Saturday, February 18, 2012

Pic: a boat trip

Gimped another picture.

A boat trip. Deviant link.
Some sort of a fairy-tale'ish boat trip at rough sea with a rescued girl.

Scanned hand-drawn outlines, painted in GIMP + GPS.

Friday, February 17, 2012

Another post

Meditated while listening to some heavy music yesterday evening. Used the music to push my motivation, which I thought I was lacking a little. Practiced grounding. Visualized circulating prana / psi from the root chakra to the head, out from the 3rd eye and so on. Then did the same in reverse.

For a couple of times, I happened to feel my astral and physical body as a whole, with psi spreading from the central channel. My astral head kept tilting away / falling out from the physical one. Tried to move it back, but since I had no reference for the direction of straight up, I found it somewhat difficult. Just opened my eyes and snapped back.

A few minutes before the wake-up alarm rang, I managed to fall asleep once more and see an interesting dream. I was at home (the first one, out of .. uhm .. 6 or something). Decided to go for a tour of photographing some weird phenomena like orbs, ghosts or something. Remembered that I hadn't charged the batteries for a long time. Put these recharging. Father entered the room to look at who was there. Told him that I was about to go out for taking some photos, as he usually joins in. *Alarm rings and I poof back*

Later when I checked the psychokinesis forum, it turned out that at night the guys had decided to snap some more photos of the orbs and mist.

About a week ago I found that for me, both tension and cold seemed to cause psi channels to shrink. Warmth , love and compassion on the other hand, seemed to widen the channels and allow for greater intensities of psi inside the body.

Thursday, February 16, 2012

Meditation fx

Meditated yesterday evening and when I opened my eyes, I experienced a sensation of focus and connection. Just stared at a pencil on the blanket. Occasionally it seemed to emit flashes of light.

A couple of weeks ago when I meditated and the body was tingling all over, I saw everything inside of me being covered in golden objects. As light was shining onto the gold, making it glitter and randomly reflecting light around. Found it to be an interesting explanation to the tingly feeling.

Monday, February 13, 2012

Glowing coal dust

Yesterday after Chronicle I focused on the buzzing of the "flame in the central channel". The feeling of singularity emerged at the middle of my brain and gradually became stronger. It's been a while since I last felt everything around that point become so wobbling and wavey.

Had trouble sleeping, as I didn't feel tired (must've slept it off on the previous days). Thus, almost the whole night was sort of meditative. Tried to keep myself focused on what I want to improve.

There was one dream that I really enjoyed though. I was at the summerhouse, it was a Summer day, but a rather cloudy and cold one. There were 2 bonfires, one of which had a grill on it. Played with psychokinesis on the wind and small pieces of glowing coals took off from the bonfires. These made me more cautious, even though they seemed harmless. At some point some sort of a red-haired witch appeared and flew past me (in the direction of the grill). I shrugged and walked over to the grill. There were different burgers on the table, varying in size. Took the first one, which was one of the smallest. I think I woke up before I managed to eat it.

Sunday, February 12, 2012

Chronicle

Visited the cinema for Chronicle. Walked past under a row of flags and attempted to lift them upwards. They rose almost horizontal, but not upwards. Still, it made me happy. When I came back, I attempted to lift a flag again and it moved a little, though, not nearly as much as previously.

The film was way better than I had expected. It not only demonstrated the dangers, but provided a solution as well. Though, it had me feeling compassion for Andrew. He could've done a lot more with his life. Visiting Tibet and seeking for enlightenment under the guidance of masters was a brilliant idea.

Often I wonder where they get their ideas from. It sounds pretty likely that they would use online psionics communities and articles from hosts similar to psi-pog.

Interesting though, that they didn't seem to experience much geisting.

Saturday, February 11, 2012

Trataka on full moon

Slept for 3 hours during the day yesterday. Focused on a chair, attempting to slide it. Practiced Trataka on the full moon for about an hour and performed alternate nostril breathing exercise. Then went to bed and slept 12 more hours.

Nothing moved yet, though, stuff snapped all around the room while practicing. During the Trataka practice I experienced waves of heat and short moments of breathing being unnecessary.

Protested against ACTA today.

Wednesday, February 8, 2012

Morning sports

My appetite has suddenly skyrocketed again. Somehow I consume a lot more energy again, though, I haven't been doing much physical work lately. Also, it's not colder outside than it usually is; actually, it's even warmer.


I've been jogging in the morning on weekdays, with just a sport dress. Mom and grandparents considered it crazy. One of the guys in the barracks room tried it out, but almost froze their nose. Well, I always wheeze a lot (more than others) while running, but still it only happened once that my nose almost froze. I think it was -32 *C that morning.

Well, yesterday morning I had to skip the exercises and felt tired. So, I made some exercises in the evening. Also practiced Trataka on the carpet for a few minutes. Started to see "the smoke" or dark transparent waves again, which I haven't seen since I left for service.

Suddenly had a strong feeling of spring yesterday, along with images / flashbacks.

Listened to a lot of "strange sounds all over the world" yesterday and found fracking or tectonic movements to be the theories that appealed to me most. An article on fracking. Haven't heard these sounds myself, though, I've always loved it when I've heard mystical sounds from a distance.

Tuesday, February 7, 2012

Dream of meditation

A couple of nights ago I had been meditating and couldn't sleep very well. Had a strange dream.

Some sort of a physical exercise had been scheduled. Nobody knew what it was and we lined up at the beginning of the training. However, it turned out that the trainer wanted us to feel comfortable and meditate for the couple of hours. Since it was supposed to be physical training, I still sneaked and did some physical exercises too. Disappointed and a bit embarrassed for doing such training in military, I asked one of the fellow soldiers: "The f*ing physical training was that?" For him, the training had been worthwile and for him it was strange that I would even ask.

In this I recognize a good old thought pattern of mine, one that makes me feel embarrassed and exposed for doing anything unusual, except for when I'm in private. The same with practicing drawing, playing guitar, drums or programming something. I'm afraid of letting others see unfinished work or something that isn't perfect. Perhaps afraid of criticism when I know that I can criticise myself the same way.


When Mom calls via Skype, I would secretly practice pk on a book on their shelf. The book caught my attention, because it had a large black and white face on it. I wonder how she would react if it started moving ::evil grin:: mwhaha. Well, maybe it's common for them - there are a lot of psi-working people there.

Experiences not experienced

I have some memories of experiences that I haven't had in this life. These might be from some dreams, TV shows or whatnot, but they seem fairly realistic and detailed. Also, I haven't been able to trace them, that is I don't know where they come from. These memories appear as pictures with feelings related to what is going on in my mind at that moment; previously I've called them flashbacks. Here are some related to military.

We're in some sort of a forest with a large convoy. It's pretty moist and the road is full of mud pits. One of the trucks got stuck again and we made a camp around it. There was a strong smell of exhaust fumes and oil. I enjoyed doing some sort of work (can't remember what exactly .. might've been chopping some trees to throw into the mud).

We are in a forest (some other place), on foot and carefully moving at the edge of a glade full of tree stumps. I think I was one of the guys at the front of the formation, at least there were a lot of guys behind me. It had been claimed that enemy might be close.

We're at a shooting range. The ground is of gravel and there are a lot of train tracks and rusty shacks and stuff for targets. The sun was about to set (low), we were talking stories and eating something.

I'm working at some sort of a military lab. A lot of bridges and stairs between small buildings outside. Quit due to an absurd order from the bosses. I think they killed the guy for not obeying the orders, which sabotaged the project.

We're crossing a field with a truck that has a small compartment at the back. Sun is shining across the snowdrifts and it's really cold even though it has doors which are closed.

The last 3 popped up perhaps even more than 14 years ago and I can't remember them very clearly.

Sunday, February 5, 2012

Some earth kasina

Visualized a ball of mud with mass and gravity moving around and circling around me yesterday evening. It seemed to have an effect on the gravity field inside me, twisting it and making it rotate a little.

Had interesting dreams, though, without much pk-related content.

In the morning, a shelf snapped and it became repetitive, kept snapping with a more-or-less constant period of time.

Saturday, February 4, 2012

Aura deforming flame

Visited a puppet museum today. There was a well for having wishes come true. I thought it was a bit pointless, for I believe all wishes come true even without wells. However, I still poured some cash down the drainage and wished I would work seriously on pk and take it beyond my imagination.

In one room at the puppet museum, a lamp was rather low and I didn't notice it, reversing too close to it. Heard a loud bang from it. Hope I didn't break anything with this geisting.

Had been thinking of practicing pk on something before going to bed. There happened to be a lit candle on the table in the living room. Focused on it, acquired the feeling of the flame (I have often just pushed a visualization on the flame rather than attempting to connect to it). It started pulsing heavily to the rhythm of an opera on the TV. Tried to twist the flame also, but the effect was not too stable.

Grandma walked next to the candle, the flame of which then leaned away from her, as if her aura were pushing it away. I was expecting it to be just wind caused by her movement, but the flame stood there for minutes with deformed shape, tilted away from her. Actually, I noticed a similar behavior when I walked past it before, but I thought it was just wind when the flame stood still with an odd shape.

Thursday, February 2, 2012

Dream of flying

Ok, 2x is a bit much, 1.5x is almost ok.

Yesterday there was snow falling. Asked my roommates for playing a little pk on the snowflakes. One of them said that his mind was not in the condition for trying this. Took a short glance at the snowfall outside and it seemed to be responsive to some extent.

It has been a long time since I last saw a flying dream. We were with a friend, searching for a nice place to discuss pk and stuff. The problem was that there were people everywhere and some of them enjoyed bullying the friend. While moving down a hallway, I was bored and started jumping, using the walls and ceiling supports to push myself forward. Eventually it developed into flying.

Today morning I had a strange appetite. I didn't want porridge, I just wanted to drink a lot of coffee. However, I don't drink coffee and the quality of the coffee here is not very good either. Well, for some reason it tasted good this morning.