Welcome

The goal of this blog is to motivate myself and others for further practice as well as provide details that might explain what's going on..


Sunday, December 25, 2011

Jesus Toast and PGeist stories

Found the ramblings of a skeptic in a newspaper yesterday. There were a few interesting photos and he mentioned a few interesting events without any references (for some, the name of the town / village was noted). A lot of thanks, happy Xmas and new year for him .. for his present. =P

He mentioned Jesus Toast, of which I didn't know anything before (someone had found the face of Jesus on a freshly toasted slice of white bread). Though, all I found on the web, was that one can now buy toasters that make Jesus Toast.

An interesting photo of a ghost, or rather, the ghostly appearance of an empty room being furnished and inhabitated by someone. One picture with a mist of orbs, too. One with some strange circle marks on the grass.

There was a picture of a poltergeist event in Võhma. Found a reference to it here (in Estonian though). There was a man, who lived alone. One day he came home and saw his table and chair on fire (the curtains and ceiling were also in flames). He quickly extinguished it with water and noticed that there were 2 strange cones on the table, burning with a low blue flame. The surface of the table was burnt around the cones, but undamaged where the cones had touched the table. One of the cones disappeared, the other "exploded".

Also found a poltergeist event on Para-web, while searching for the Võhma event. Spontaneous combustion of objects or air near the objects. The community seemed to have welcomed him as a fraud and his friends were convinced that he had lit his apartment himself. :(

Dad said there used to be a show "Monoloog tundmatuga" (Monologue with a stranger) when I was little. Looking for some archive videos or something, I stumbled upon a couple of rumors that the host had been told to stop the show, then 2 of his interviewees died and he stopped it. Couldn't find any videos, though, it seems that a lot of interesting stuff happened in Estonia back in the 70's - 90's.

Friday, December 23, 2011

Communications geisting

A few days ago, grandmother suddenly called, quite angry at me. It turned out that for them, Skype didn't show me online and for me, it didn't show them online. A fairly common bug, but caused hard feelings.

It worked after killing and restarting the Skype again. Without audio input though. Grandfather logged out, I tried again with the Echo service and it was working. Don't have a clue of what was wrong.

Called them next morning. Grandfather picks up .. I can't hear him at all. I call him once more. This time I can hear him, but he can barely hear me. No problems with other calls.

Would prefer to keep them healthy and well, as well as have the relationships in good shape.

Other than geisting, I've been tingling all over the body pretty much all the time. It's not as uncomfortable as when I arrived, but it's still pretty noticeable. Occasionally I feel floaty or close to weightless, almost like I used to.

Got to meditate some more =D

Tuesday, December 20, 2011

Angel and butterfly 2

K, finished a version of the angel drawing that I started quite a while ago.

Once at the summerhouse, I saw the shape of an angel with a butterfly in her hand. From a specific angle and correct lighting, the wood spots looked like this:
Angel on the ceiling
Based on the captured image, I sketched it on paper, scanned it in. Then vectorized and painted it in Gimp:
Angel with a butterfly.
A link to DeviantArt.

Monday, December 19, 2011

Lamp trataka and wind

Thought of practicing Trataka again yesterday. Happened to look out of the balcony door window, a bright street lantern was shining in from there. Thought why not, and started staring at the lamp. Wind rose, the tree branches that it lit up, swayed around. The street lamp blinked.

Thought it would be better to avoid pulsing it and focused on changing its color from yellow to bluish green. Couldn't quite get it to change colour though. Went to bed.

Woke up in the morning and just when I was about to turn around, I noticed that the street lamp was bluish white, with a slight greenish tint. When I came back in the evening, it was not lit .. had already broken it by staring at it just once =/.

Today I didn't feel like coming home by bus. Just thinking about it made me feel depressed. Decided to go on foot, even though my health is not 100% yet (some signs of the re-awoken pneumonia still left). Well, it looked all good until a buddy commented on the weather being inconvenient. Wind picked up, pushing me forward.

There was a chocolate wrapper on the street. Tried to levitate it, wind picked up, rolling it further. The gust of wind stopped and I tried again. The wrapper made a suspicious crackling sound and one of its edges lifted up maybe 5 cm (edit: now that I think about it, perhaps more like 3 cm). The edge descended to the ground, then wind picked up again and blew it away.

Enjoyed the wind some more and tried to shield against it. It seemed to have worked pretty ok.

There was uncomfortably much psi in my lower chakras. Laid myself down in bed and moved a bunch up into the crown.

Edit: One more fun thing happened today. A satellite team member dropped the cap of a marker. It fell on the table, bounced off, hit a chair, hit it once more, bounced off and hit the floor, then it came to me, jumping on its way. The scene looked pretty unlikely to happen and really fun to observe. We had a good laughter as I picked it up.

Saturday, December 17, 2011

Wakeup from shutdown, again

Alarm rang at 8.30 again.

Thought I'd continue sleeping.

*DVD-ROM sound* Wtf? Quickly woke up and took the laptop out of its bag. The battery was empty and it was in stand-by. So, it had woken up from a total shutdown again. It probably drained the battery in the bag, fell into stand-by, woke up again and fell into stand-by once more, because the battery was empty.

Couldn't sleep anymore.

My chest started to hurt, worse than before. Focused on healing it and drank some tea.

The radiometer is still standing still, by the way.

Friday, December 16, 2011

Uncle's concert

Sister called and asked me to go to uncle's concert with her. I thought I would rather go home or something. Then about half an hour later, I had developed a great urge to go to the concert. Called her back and convinced her to come with me :).

Uncle looked slightly off at first. The place of a couple of his friends had burned down and they had gone to hospital. Also, his tumor was causing him a headache. We attempted to improve his confidence with pk. By the end of the first song, it was pretty good already.

The song content was pretty similar to the last one - related to self-healing and enlightenment. Made my biofield explode again, resulting in cold shivers and the feeling of my surroundings (other people, sound waves in the air, the church) as a part of my body. Thought I would enjoy the feeling of the violinist playing. *Sqeak* the amplifier started generating on the violinist's channel. I pulled back, focusing on the surroundings, rather. Targeted the row of candles next to them. Visualized the candle flames dancing in the rhythm of the music. The flames started dancing when I left them and focused on something else.

Had a supper with uncle later, talking on pk and healing subjects later. He said he really needed the concert himself and that he felt a lot better again. I also really enjoyed the concert and it gave me a lot of fresh motivation for healing my re-awoken pneumonia (seriously caught cold at the base course finishing ceremony again).

A lot of bouncing out of body while walking home later. I've started to feel becoming lightweight and floaty again. When I came back from service, I felt amazingly heavy on the stairs.

Wednesday, December 14, 2011

Random events 2

Once I was guarding the area in the barracks at night. Started seeing a lot of figures move up and down the stairs, back and forth in the hallways and stuff. The figures were transparent, but slightly brighter than their background. People moving around in their dreams? Or maybe I was dreaming with my eyes open (brain was repeating daily movements as a faint overlay)?

Bored at the hospital, I had an inspiring OBE / dream. Went to father and asked him what to draw. He showed me what came to his mind (snapshots from animated people and objects). He gave me ideas of what to draw for a week. Father didn't remember me visiting him though.

After an OBE attempt at the hospital, I found myself inside the body but detached. Found it strange but cool that my biofield had the shape of a spacecraft. Changed its orientation and moved myself around with it, feeling the obstacles (bed structure, walls, window) on the way. Fun to play with, but with all the excitement, I went back to remember the experience in detail.

Monday, December 12, 2011

Dreams dreams

Had an interesting dream a couple of nights ago. Father had gotten a job in a secret military project. He got me and a bunch of other guys into it as well. I never got to see the machinery I would've been working on, had to wake up and visit the toilet just in time. Anyway, the project seemed to cover weather manipulation and the induction of mass hallucinations for defense purposes. They ran a small scale test .. a cloud of bees appeared, swarming on a few test subjects. The test subjects apparently thought the bees were real. I stepped in and found the stinging pain unreal, as usual in a dream. As I understood, the system was modular and the core was a heavy metal cylinder that had a working radius of a few hundred kilometers.

Some days earlier I had a random dream where the atmosphere suddenly changed. I found a few dark words and signs on random objects in the dream. It caught my attention and I became curious as to why there were such symbols and stuff all over the objects (bunk beds and metal lockers). Then the atmosphere changed again - just as if the dream designers were switched or something (the feeling of presence changed). Suddenly the dream no longer felt gloomy and the words and signs had disappeared. Can't remember what the dream was about though.

Final journey

The evening before the final journey (52 km in full gear + 40 kg of backpack at a pretty high speed), I wished for a nice weather and that there wouldn't be many gravel roads (loose rocks tend to mess up my feet). Next morning it's snowing heavily. At first I was disappointed, but after a 100 m of walking on the gravel roads, I realized my wish had actually come true - thanks to snow, there were barely any loose rocks and the road was soft for the feet.

After 20 km and back at the camp, we were all wet and I wished there would be sunshine for the next 32 km. A couple of minutes later I noticed that the sky was clear. Next morning we set off with a nice sunshine. The downside was that the road was covered in ice and the dry pair of shoes were not too comfortable (the ones that had so far always messed up my feet).

Decided not to shout for any pauses myself. Kept poking the lieutenant and other guys with the thought "Pause" until we got one and I could set the backpack and stuff correctly again (it always got loose, started peeling the hips or fell on the shoulders with all its weight). At some point, I decided to quit because of the hips, shoulders and feet. I thought: "I'll quit at the next stop." After maybe 3 km, I thought: "Yup, I'll quit even if it's the last stop and even if it's still 10 km." Well, at the stop, the only problem was that it was the last stop and there was only about 10 km to go so that the lieutenant did not allow anyone to quit. I finished the journey, but didn't achieve anything in my mind.

One thing that I noticed on the journeys was that even my subconscious was "lying" to me. Have a strong feeling that the finish is 250 m behind that bush. I reach that bush, it says it's 400 m behind the next left turn. I reach the turn and the same stuff goes on..

There was one way to withstand the pain (usually the bottoms of the feet or hips) - walking in a meditative state with focus outside of the body. I was always too tired for levitation or pk training during the journeys.

Sunday, December 11, 2011

Random events 1

During the first week in service, I had a "Deja Vu" while looking at the table of complaints in our room. Unpacked the feeling and looked around. It was 11th of November and I had been away for a long time. A lot had happened while I was away. Now that I was back, there were only a few weeks left before the end of the base course.

It came true with the exception that I got out of hospital on November 15th, not on 11th.

Once we went to a local basketball match with the guys. Visualized the feeling of being the ball, the players and  hoops. It was pretty fun to play with for an hour or so, having close to 80% of shots go as visualized. Though, I eventually got tired and the game got out of control .. a lot of fouls followed.

The shooting camp was also interesting in a way. By the end of the camp, I felt where I hit the target. Usually forgot to visualize the hits before pulling the trigger though - I think this would've improved it a lot further.

Saturday, December 10, 2011

Base course

Finished the base course and now there's a bit more freedom again.
Thanks to everyone for your support! It helped me a lot =).

It was pretty depressive at first. According to some of my roommates, the conditions were worse than in prison. Well, for me it changed after the first week - the second week was quite cheery already and I was in the mood for some pk practice. Telepathic influence on the drill sergeants, a little bit of weather manipulation and some healing as well. Weather manipulation and healing almost always worked, telepathic influence was successful on maybe half of the attempts or so.

Pretty often when I thought something in the lines of: "Bah, I don't want to clean the toilet again, they always put me in there on cleaning days." Then something similar happened: "5 of you shall stack firewood in the rear. You, you and you too."

One day the chiefs lined us up, took our locker keys, threw them all around the corridor and gave us some minutes to be back in line with our keys. I memorized the key pattern just before handing it over and thought: "Now, how could I possibly find my key from the scattered 40 in time. There are holes in the floor, what if some of the keys fell in there?" With everyone running around recklessly, I saw someone pick up a key and put it on the table. Walked up to the table and took the key .. recognized the pattern, it was mine. The first key! That really blew my mind =D.

After the 2nd week, I understood what the drunk stranger had meant. Suddenly fell ill with pneumonia and spent almost half of the service (a month) in hospital. That was pretty nasty, but allowed me for more practice time with psi, a lot of time to practice sketching and read tech magazines. Then Mom sent an SMS from Spain: "Now you've had enough rest. You should continue." =D Shortly after that, the doctor let me out again.

While ill, I realized how many entities there are around us. There were hundreds of them sharing tips on how I can recover better. I think there are a lot of them observing our lives, while waiting for their (re-)birth.

All in all, I found that I still have problems with my own psychology. The most difficult challenge was to reprogram myself into liking something that I did not like at all. Also, when I managed to convince myself that I can do something, I'll do it and heck, I'll even enjoy it .. then I witnessed "miracles".

Wednesday, October 5, 2011

C u

Thank you all for everything!

Going to serve from early tomorrow morning.

See you.. =)

Synchronous and kind

Went straight to bed yesterday evening. Woke up and went to sleep again.

Had an interesting dream this morning. I was talking to someone via telepathy. Looked out of the window, it was rainy. Proposed to clear the sky and have the sun shining. A minute later, the sun was out. Looked out of the window and noticed that there was something going on on the roof. Looked out from the balcony. They were building something really big out there. I had seen it before, but this time there was a dome on it - a part of which I think I could see from the window. Took a few pictures of the dome. On one of the pictures, there was some sort of a Tibetan text up at the centre.

Focused on the feeling from the dream and started seeing the light coming from everything around me again.

Today everyone was so kind. Had a couple of discounts while shopping for some stuff for the service.

All of the most important events took place at 11:11, 13:13, 17:17 or similar (again).

A friend told me not to forget my superpowers and to use them for making my journey easier.

When I came home, a drunk man stood out from the crowd. He came to me and mumbled something really cryptic, but I couldn't understand a word. Unpacked from the feeling of it, I think this is what he said: "Be careful. Well, you would be ok anyway, but still, it doesn't hurt to be careful."

Monday, October 3, 2011

Fun pk expeditions

Visited the AHHAA centre yesterday. Saw a lot of fun stuff to practice pk on.

Though, I wasn't in the zone there. Visited some meditation eggs and then attempted to shrink a waterspout and create a construct between my fingers that would be visible for the IR camera. Also attempted to sway corals in the fish tanks, influence fish with telepathy and attempted to create a construct to help me stay vertical in a tilted room. Had some small success with all of them, but on overall it didn't go too surprisingly well.

The ticket costs a lot, thus it would be fun to have some of that stuff at home =P.

Sunday, October 2, 2011

Angel and butterfly

During the summer at the summerhouse, I saw the figure of an angel, made of wood spots on the ceiling. Have been working on the drawing recently. On the drawing, there's a butterfly sitting on the hand of an angel. There's been some synchronicity with the drawing.

Sister is also back from U.S. (home for a week already). She showed me a couple of drawings she had made a while ago. Angels, one of which looked like a self-portrait and the other .. a zoom-in of the drawing I've been working on.

Kevin came to visit us today. The girl who was with him asked why there was a butterfly on my table. I had totally forgotten there was one and said "It's part of the dust." Went to the kitchen maybe 10 minutes later and a butterfly flew in from the open window. Took me a few minutes to save it. I could get it to sit on my finger with empathy, but it was too nervous to get out and kept flying against the window.

Attended the first official meeting of a local newborn gamedev club. Deja vu, I've seen the meeting and met some of those guys before. It's going to be interesting when I return from service.

Friday, September 30, 2011

Juniper and nettle

Drank juniper and nettle tea again yesterday evening, to purify blood and help against the acne. In addition, it also seems to clean the flow of psi. However, for me it has a couple of side-effects .. a wet dream and a pile of hunger the next day.

Meditating / sleeping while listening to music has an interesting effect. I end up staying in one place for longer than usually. Learning instruments by observing the artists or just exploring feelings and visiting places that are related.

Stepped into a "hole" again and dropped out of body while walking home. Felt pretty floaty at home too. Hm, it's warm and windy outside - maybe that's why I feel so floaty.

For the last few weeks, I've been seeing the 11:11 phenomena really often (pretty much each time I glance at the clock).

Wednesday, September 28, 2011

Rainwalk

Two nights ago I couldn't sleep and ended up meditating for most of the time. I was so tired that when I closed my eyes, I snapped out right away, but I still couldn't sleep. Sushumna flame was pretty intense and strangely enough, lilac coloured. In it, I saw objects and situations that reflected my feelings. In the morning I thought it would be another zombie day, but I was wrong.

Due to a few sleepless nights, last night we went training with the guest. Had a nice deep-sleep night, feeling better refreshed in the morning.

10 *C and the sky looked clear this morning, so I didn't take my jacket with me (I'm glad I didn't, it would've become wet ;). Ended up walking home with it raining. Interestingly though, spherical raindrops stayed on my t-shirt (sort of like they would on a lotus flower) without getting me too wet. The water that was pouring down from my hair ran down my back under the t-shirt though.

Sunday, September 25, 2011

Happy

Finished another drawing: Evening flight.

Yesterday night I practiced sliding a roll of tape on the shelf while listening to some happy music.
After that, I practiced some Trataka on the mirror (just a random spot instead of my own reflection this time) and attempted to form a fog of light on the floor. During both of these, I felt and saw entities of light appearing around me. They left when a more gloomy song started playing.

Went to see other science theaters, with Mom today. A girl entered the room, who caught my attention. Due to working with computers a lot, I couldn't see very well and couldn't recognize her by face. Though, I knew who she was and telepathically told her to sit next to me. I was really blown when she did that. Felt a bit embarrassed for having done that without a reason.

Somewhere in the building where these science shows were held, there was a weird spot. When Mom stepped there, her ears locked and head started buzzing as if being hit with ultrasound or something. For me, walking through the spot caused nausea and made my head ache. Psi felt strange in that spot. There were lots of hi-voltage and hi-frequency machinery nearby and perhaps the metal dome was converging the electromagnetic waves or something? Or perhaps a Grebennikov's Cavernous Structures Effect?

Back at home I realized I had greatly underestimated myself again. "How could it even be possible for me to be pure enough to have these entities appear? Anyway, one day I will be. What? No, I am."

Watched Tron: Legacy again. Wow, last time I watched it, it didn't seem that awesome. This time I got really happy and psyched.

Saturday, September 24, 2011

Suspicious weather

I have developed a craving for something mystical again. Nothing feels real enough. Sleeping or rather, meditating (half-dream state) in bed didn't solve it, only perhaps alleviated it a bit. Actually, regular pk practice doesn't intrigue me too much either at the moment.

Recently people around me have been commenting on the weather. "Oh, it's raining from a clear sky again. In this town, it's impossible to predict the weather." For example, we went to a restaurant, it started raining. I hadn't taken my jacket with me, gambling against the weather. We left the restaurant, in a few seconds it stopped raining and sun came out again. Sky cleared up.

Today we visited the science theatres with the guest. On our way back, a darker cloud was following us. Some raindrops from the clear sky again. We're home *starts raining heavily*. I go take a nap (meditate on the bed). I realise something *everything goes red*. I open my eyes *loud thunder*, *silence and weather clears up*. Found it weird that it only flashed lightning once and really close.

Weather manipulation and geisting makes people wonder.

Mom presented some stuff she had bought from the U.S. Among other things, there were some humour-license cards. She gave me an Area 51 UFO operator license of humour. I handed it to father - he has operated one of them. Mom said: "No, it's yours. He has already flown one, now it's your turn." Would be fun, though, I don't think it would feel more real than this life. I don't know what would feel real at the moment - something out of body?

Wednesday, September 21, 2011

Samsara, again

It was raining and Mom called me to buy some stuff at the department store on the way home. Practiced some rainshielding on the way. Kept reminding myself what Owltwelve said on the forum:

How could you possibly have wasted life or effort, when that time & effort brought you here. We are all on the journey; you are working on it:)

And kept bringing my focus back to guru yoga practice. That is, visualizing myself being an enlightened guru and observing myself from the perspective of that construct.

At home, I wanted to start colouring my next drawing. Laptop power adapter didn't work (most likely the wire is broken from somewhere). I wasn't too happy about it and attempted healing on it. Similarly to the speakers of the laptop, which work randomly, it seemed as if pk didn't work on it. Gave up and tried again later. When the battery was so low already that it was about to shut down (a second or two remaining), it suddenly started working again.

For some reason, when I look at the guy flying on the drawing, I feel uneasiness. It triggers a mind-block that makes me feel it's impossible (haven't seen or heard of anyone flying like that - except for in anime).

Watched "Samsara" again, this time with Mom. I could feel her psi moving around. Occasionally psi started resonating in both of us.

At some moment they switched on something in the nearby "nuclear power plant" (that's how we call the boiler building complex with greenhouses and stuff, because it makes the whole sky glow at night). I felt my heart chakra resonating with the frequency of that plant. The same tingly-pulsing feeling as while listening to metal back at one of the summerhouses (clicky).

Due to empathy and movie content, I constantly had to move a lot of psi to upper chakras. In the end, I had to weep tears a few times. It was a lot more emotional this time.

Sunday, September 18, 2011

Mom's back

Mom came home again. I'm really happy about it and the psi is sloshing around me more than it usually does. Empathy is also stronger than before. Maybe it's because of some exercises I've been doing (focusing on one thing) or something else, I don't know. One thing that definitely improves empathy and pk a lot is drawing.

While going to pick her up though, I suddenly sensed a strong feeling of hopeless-being-busy from Mom (it filled the whole town and thick clouds started forming above the area she was about to arrive at). Changed the feeling, weather turned nicer again. Later she complained about having a lot of stuff to do and that she's in a hurry due to a lot of inconvenient circumstances.

Laptop woke up from a shut-down again. I don't think it has WOL (Wake-on-LAN) configured and even if it did, there shouldn't be any magic packets running around in our home network.

Friday, September 16, 2011

Forgot to mention

Forgot to mention some stuff in the previous post.
That day I also changed the wind direction by 90 degrees while looking at a "wind-flag" (a big aluminum ship model on top of a bridge post). Managed to turn the ship with wind.
I saw a small flood in one of my dreams a week ago and it turned out that due to this storm, there was a flood in the capital city.
There was something else, but I forgot it again.

The next morning, the ad had wrapped over the frame for at least 4-5 turns (hanging half its height). So, it was still a success .. with a small delay =). The ad was fixed again when I went back home.

I sometimes like to break the habit .. and work a few more hours.

Wednesday, September 14, 2011

Wind, yay

There's a nice wind today.

Wanted to cause a whirlwind around me. A couple of blocks later, I witnessed one forming about 30 meters from me. A pile of leaves and dust spiralled 5 storeys up to the roof. Neat.

A cloth ad had broken loose and was flapping in the wind. Played with it a little and then attempted to roll it on the edge of the frame (the force of wind against the force of wind). Close, but couldn't do it before it was already out of sight. Still cool though.

Sunday, September 11, 2011

Jupiter Trataka

Performed Trataka on Jupiter yesterday evening. At first, the Jupiter was covered by clouds. Attempted some cloud-forming, while staring at a certain point in the sky. A few minutes later the sky cleared up and I continued with staring at Jupiter.

As my eyes adjusted to the area I was looking at, I started seeing the surrounding areas with greater contrast. Something caught my attention. It looked like a cloud, though, it wasn't - it was quite transparent and didn't move. Found it mind-boggling that it was more-or-less at the spot where I had attempted cloud-forming some minutes ago.

Finished another drawing (clicky).

Saturday, September 10, 2011

Leaves flyin

I once said "Should start practicing psychokinesis again". He thought he had heard me wrong and asked: "What? Who?" I repeated and he asked again. "Is that even possible," he asked. I said "Try it!"

Decided to show him that it's real. When we went to copy the keys today, it occurred to me to play with weather manipulation a little. Sun was shining and there were a few small clouds floating across the sky, little to no wind. A few minutes later, a large rain cloud had appeared. Wind rose, colored leaves started flying around and a slight rainfall appeared.

When we came back, the sky had almost cleared up, no wind, and sun was cooking. He complained of it being too hot. I pointed at the cloud that had flown over us before. We started calling it back, wind picked up from that direction.

At home, he decided to visit one of his friends. This time he took his jacket with him. The moment he announced it, it started raining. When he left, it was already raining quite heavily.

Busy times

Busy times before the vacation of crawling in the mud. Haven't been practicing much.

Someone came to our town for practicals and we offered accommodation. Being home alone with no skeptics around works as a slightly better motivation for practicing =).

Yesterday at work, when everyone else had already left, I put my code compiling, switched on a digital scale and put a battery on the scale. Attempted to increase its weight. When I got the feeling of the battery, it started wobbling back and forth and got it to weigh 1 gram extra. Although it's a small success after a while, it made me feel good. A few minutes later, the scale switched itself off and the code had been compiled as well .. continued with other stuff.

Thursday, September 1, 2011

Blindsight

Forgot to mention a dream in the previous post. I agreed to format Kevin's hard drive and install linux. I had just 16 minutes to do it. So, I gathered info and practiced it the night before, out of body. Bent some time and did it all quick (for me it took a few hours). I was pretty happy about it. In real life next morning, the situation was not as rosy though. It took a few hours and I still couldn't do it (no CDs, no DVDs with linux and no blanks either. No USB stick, nothing.) - even booting ISO directly from another partition resulted in too many problems.

Focused on the same vibration in the body as before (when the heart chakra was resonating with music). Started seeing through closed eyelids again yesterday night. Played with FOV (Field of View) a little and tried to maintain the vision as long as possible. I think I could fix my eyesight when I learned to program with closed eyes =).

Wednesday, August 31, 2011

'Home' again

Some nights ago I had a dream where someone announced that a war was coming. A bunch of skilled ones appeared to train us. They reminded me of ninjas from Naruto (which we had probably watched a day before).

Kevin was in another village and occasionally came to visit. He would ask someone to give him a ride, eat cakes in the village me and father were at and then go back again =D. Finally managed to go to the other village.

Kevin left music playing during the night. I went to bed in the other room, focusing on the feeling of my body resonating with the music. Strange, but heavy metal seemed to stimulate my heart chakra pretty well. I could feel the chakra pulsating in my chest and hands. Occasionally made some out-of-body exercises and continued meditating on that pleasant pulsating feeling.

During this lengthy meditation, I started seeing through my eyelids. It's been a while. My head was slightly out of body (about 1 cm). When I moved it back inside, I could no longer see through my eyelids. Experimented with it some more and found out that while slightly out-of-body, everything was better lit (it was pretty dark and I could only see the pattern of the ceiling through closed eyelids). Though, I still didn't see the objects on the ceiling very well (saw shapes, but couldn't make out what they were). While slightly out-of-body, I could add more shapes and objects to the ceiling, rotate them and stuff. When I opened my eyes again, they were no longer there though.

That night I learned a lot and empathy improved as well. In a bus the next day, I felt as if in multiple bodies at the same time (people on the bus, the bus itself and some of its surroundings).

Sunday, August 28, 2011

Summary, a random one

I didn't ask them, but it seems that Jacob suddenly always wants to play with me. After the last OBE, aunt also seems to enjoy my company more than before.

The light bulb in their outdoor lamp had exploded about 2 days before our arrival. That was roughly the day of that OBE (might not be related, but worth a note nevertheless).

First evening, Kevin invited me to play some drums at his friend's place. It's amazing, how fast one can learn when they're "in the moment". Though, my "in the moment" got lost on the 3rd day after an unpleasant phone call.

Haven't felt as floaty here as I did back home. Some mild weather manipulation, light-stepping on loose stones, reducing the weight of stones, micro-pk on a tractor engine and everyday events. Redirected some falling stones and shield-protected Jacob when he would've almost cut himself with a knife.

Kevin had succeeded in rain-shielding himself yet again (kept his clothes dry at his graduation even though it was raining a lot). Being chased by a growling dog once, he had made a shield and when the dog reached the shield, it fled in the opposite direction, tail between the legs and whining. Awesome..

On our way here, we were reading on Grebennikov's Cavernous Structures Effect with father. This made me wonder about the purpose of my life. Everything started to seem so tiny and meaningless. Discussed it with dad and found everything even more pointless. I think this is what triggered the following dream:

I was looking to my left. There were my problems and worries. In front of me, there was something else and there was also something different to my right. A master told me something in the lines of:

You're a good ???
You're mediocre at ??? (self-control?)
And you're a bad sorcerer.

You can improve it all.

"Bad sorcerer" caught my attention. He told me to start looking towards my right. I think there was a feeling of mysticism there.

Sunday, August 21, 2011

Ghosting at summerhouse

Took vacation. Spent most of the Saturday working hard. Finished it, took a break and practiced these OBE exercises. Studied UDK editor a bit and went to bed.

Even though it was 1 AM already, I couldn't sleep as I felt too energized for that. All I could do was these OBE exercises. As close to sleeping as I could get was hanging in a half-dream state.

So, I was hanging there. Felt being pulled out of body. I think I was floating in my room, facing towards the balcony. Still there, when I had an idea: "I wonder if I could be reborn in such a way that I create my body from scratch (just by visualizing and materializing a form). Err, after this life, that is." I was glad I didn't mess up with the thought.

I felt being pulled. I arrived somewhere, I was too early - it was early in the morning and still dark outside. Felt mischievous and still entered. Instead of opening the door, I suddenly just ended up inside (I think I saw an image of the place and entered the site through the image). It was dark, but I saw a cupboard in front of me. There was a wooden door somewhere nearby, a bunk bed and next to it there was someone's schoolbag.

On second thought, I decided to knock on a door before entering. Knocked, but I could barely hear any sound. Wtf, knocked again and louder this time, still barely audible. Tried knocking on the walls, still nothing. The windows worked the best, so I knocked at them in as many places as I could, hoping for some sort of a reaction.

Aunt: "Jacob, stop making that noise.."
I suddenly became aware of myself in my aunt's room. I was now looking towards the bunk bed from next to a door. To my right, there was a window where moonlight came in. Jacob seemed awake and he replied to aunt: "I'll better sleep next to Sussch, then."
He came towards me and hugged me. Popped back and woke up to write it down at 3.08 AM.

I was rather disoriented and couldn't see very well, thus the confusion. I had always been in the same room. The door that I knocked on, it didn't lead to the room as I had thought. I was knocking on it from the same room, looking behind my back at the same time (which resulted in seeing stuff at strange angles). The cupboard was next to the door, in front of the bunk bed.

Pretty cool, I'll see what people talk when I go to the summerhouse =).

Saturday, August 20, 2011

Grey corridors

Had a few random pop-outs again.

Performed a few exercises. Felt a pleasant buzzing all over the body and found myself flying through the corridor of a building. It looked fairly modern with all the grayish white concrete walls and floors. There was a square window at a 45 degree angle on the left wall. Behind the window I think there was the sky and perhaps a tree or something. Flew up to the window and woke up to make sure I remembered it afterwards.

Stirred the dense psi on the crown a little and started feeling pressure on my 3rd eye. Focused on it and saw myself flying through a building, into a dark cave or something. Someone told me not to go there. I stopped for a moment and looked around. It looked dark on the outside, but I could see streams of white psi moving around in the dark walls and heard someone calling. I continued flying forward until I arrived at a dark room (just not very well lit). The floor and walls looked similar to the previous experience. There was someone there, dressed in grey and she had grey / white hair. She turned around, I saw her face and popped back again, just in case. She looked a bit spooky too.

Friday, August 19, 2011

Village of red bricks

Sat down, but didn't feel like doing exercises, felt I would just want to meditate for change. A sudden emptiness appeared, there was nothing going on in my mind.

I recognized the place, I had been there once in my dreams before. It's a closed area (doesn't exist when looked at from the outside), nobody gets in and nobody gets out unless there's a strong need for it.

I think the first time I saw this dream, I met someone who lived there. They took me there, but I wanted to leave the place right away because I felt too impure and out of control. The whole area is full of peace and serenity, the beings are always calm and very intelligent.

The architecture looked similar to what I think can be seen in London, but everything was made of red bricks (all the walls, street floor and so on). The first time, I was there during autumn and there were yellow leaves falling from clear sky or something (the whole area was hidden below the branches of a leaf tree, somewhere on the verge of a mountain).

This time I recognized the feeling of that place. I could barely see anything (all hazy and out of focus), but somehow I was inside. I was a lot more pure than the last time I visited this place, but still I didn't feel comfortable. Focused on the feeling that was on the streets there. There were a few repercussions, something in me didn't stand such purity and left, which was followed by peace.

I think there was a small shop, a train station, a church and the homes of the people living there. The area was incredibly small, but somehow everything fit in there.

Some exercises

Out-of-body workouts are becoming more vivid. I've become addicted. Though, I'm trying to avoid doing it much in public, maybe someone can see it.

Some exercises cause a feeling of disorientation and nausea. Leaning forward, making a full revolution and ending back at the original orientation was one of the exercises, during which I lost track of where and how I was oriented (can't see my surroundings during the workout yet).

One of the most confusing exercise was the following: I'm lying on the bed. From the pose of my body, I take a meditation pose in my visualization. Then I lean back and rotate into an orientation where I'm upside down, staring at the chin of the body. With this I lost all sense of what's downside up or upside down or whatever.

Interesting how when I rotated myself around "the vertical" axis, there were two orientations that sort of "snapped" in: face in face and face at the behind of the neck. This was the case when the visualizations were vivid enough, otherwise I didn't notice any "snap-into-place" effect.

The most convenient one was to lie in bed and lower the lower body through the bed, ending up in a convenient sitting pose.

Another thing I tried yesterday was stretching one of my limbs to an object and merging with the object, then morphing the limb back to its original shape and bringing it back. This was difficult to perform in bed, because it didn't matter what I attempted to merge with, I would always merge with the mattress as well (used to practice on it a long time ago, now it's in the reflexes or something).

Messed up with sleeping, it got cold. I ended up tired. Had to "take out the garbage" (empty the mind) in order to stop from accidentally doing stuff (locking boss in, burning myself with a soldering iron and so on).

Uncle needed someone to sell tickets for a CD presenting concert of their family concerts. The CD doesn't do it much justice, in my opinion. There are only songs, without uncle's enlightening stories. Had a good chance to listen to their songs again =P. Almost constant goosebumps, several tears and stuff. There was a lady who came to listen the songs; she was pretty pissed when she arrived. I wondered what she would look like when the concert was over. She looked the same (face hadn't changed, she barely smiled), but she herself had changed a lot =).

Wednesday, August 17, 2011

Work-out of body

Decided to practice OBEs in a way that's new for me. Have been doing workout exercises without moving the physical body. Doing push-ups out of body while lying on my chest. Rising up and hugging my feet while lying on my back. The more I do it, the more vivid it becomes. It doesn't yield any OBE results at first, but it doesn't matter. When I have mastered this, leaving the body with full control should be easy. Popping back should then no longer be a problem either. Best of all, I feel like doing it, it feels right.

Although I haven't fully left the body like this, it still seems to have side-effects similar to that of OBEs.

Monday, August 15, 2011

Shared OBE excitement

Slept a lot yesterday, though, none of the dreams seemed lucid. I was really tired as well. Checked the forums before bed and a video in "Obe & Pk" caught my attention (EnochianBoy's New OBE). Didn't watch it though. Got the feeling of him from the thumbnail picture.

While at work, a clear image of his face suddenly popped into my mind. After that I felt his presence everywhere for the next couple of hours. I think he healed me and was excited to practice OBEs together. He shared a lot of his excitement, it really made me look forward to it. It slowly faded after that, but I could still tell that he was asleep. A moment later the feeling was gone and it felt as if he either no longer remembered it or a part of the memory had been lost. I think I'm kind of numb or something, because not much of the excitement got stuck to me when he left. Just a little but it's enough for some practicing =).

Watched the video just a moment ago.

Sunday, August 14, 2011

Healing electronics

Before going to the haunting house trip, it was pretty cloudy in Estonia. Father checked from Meteoblue that the sky would be cloudy for the whole day and the next day too. That seemed like a bad combination for the air show they are holding at the town again (so far they have been out of luck almost every year). Intended for the weather to clear out. Right before departure, sun came out and sky started to clear out. It was also pretty much clear at our destination.

Before departure, I also checked my old MP3 player that had been tanning on the shelf because it was broken. Inserted a relatively new battery and it was working. The button was still down, but it was now somehow functioning. Though, for some reason, it acted similarly to the music station in the living room (a quantum system that works better when used with some pk). Interesting, I had practiced "healing" on the broken button and never actually tried it afterwards. It seems it worked, but caused the MP3 player to "become remote controlled with pk". Buttons sometimes work the other way round so that when I lower the volume, it increases and vice versa.

Haunting house

The haunted house trip was postponed and one of the guys couldn't come so that I could ask father to come with us. We would've probably missed half of it all when he hadn't come.

It was a hike through the swamp and I really enjoyed the nature there. It was so quiet there that even my mind was quiet. Hm, actually, my mind was quiet before the trip as well. During the first day, there were only just a few birds and almost no animals around. Meditated some, watching the sunset.

Took a few pictures, looking for orbs there. One of the guys captured some pretty interesting phenomena on the photos. He acted on his gut feeling and found a strange fog or cloud of orbs or something that formed different shapes, broke apart into individual orbs and stuff.

When it was dark, father told his alien, ghost and superhero stories at the bonfire. It was a nice full-moon for telling these stories =).

For me it got too cold in the tent so that I couldn't sleep much. Luckily it was my turn to go into the house (which was considerably warmer).

The building had been built pretty recently and didn't seem very related to the ghost. Though, it definitely gave off a spooky feeling that might spark fear and cause panic. I was a bit scared when I entered, but Harry Potter Patronus-like stuff helped (visualizing happy and enjoyable moments). There were a couple of candles lit (a white and a red one).

I sat down and visualized the ghost sitting on the edge of something that looked like table. Started talking with him in my mind (all sort of stuff I thought he might find interesting). While I was doing that, the room was silent and the red candle was pulsing. When I stopped talking and there was a moment of emptiness in my mind, the flame of the red candle stopped pulsing, door, windows, ceiling started making cracking and snapping sounds. I could feel uneasiness increasing when I wasn't chatting. My time was up, I thanked him again and took the dictaphone away.

There was another sleepless guy. Visited the lake, which was all covered in a thick mist. Put some more branches into the bonfire and enjoyed it until sunrise, which was really pretty as well.

A couple of more hikes with father early in the morning and went to sleep in the house. When I woke up, everything looked the way I had visualized them before (in order to control fear). There was this strong feeling of peace and enjoyment.

Wind rose. While packing the tent and sleeping bag, the wind changed direction and increased, helping me out a lot. Almost as if there were an extra pair of hands helping.

Later I threw something into the bonfire, but missed. Visualized it catching fire; wind picked up and blew the flames so that they occasionally leaned to the object. It didn't lit up though. Sometimes smoke started rising from the target without the help of flames touching it.

Tried some pk on a plastic spoon too, but it barely budged.

Saturday, August 13, 2011

Anger, RV

Shirak made an inspiring post in the quotes section:

"Holding on to anger is like grasping a hot coal with the intent of throwing it at someone else; you are the one who gets burned." - Buddha

All that we are is the result of what we have thought. The mind is everything. What we think we become. - Buddha

I copied this from another thread but it holds power here it is.

"One day a man found out that his brother had renounced worldly life to become a monk, and he became very angry. He set off on foot to find the Buddha, and upon finding him, he began to abuse the Buddha. He yelled at him, spit on him and even struck him with his fist. The Buddha did not flinch, instead he remained as calm and as blissful as he always was. If you offered some food to a guest who came to your house, and the guest left without eating any of it, who would the food belong to? the Buddha asked the man.

The man was confused by this seemingly very strange question, but upon reflection he replied, "Of course, it would belong to me!" The Buddha shook his head in agreement and then said, In the same way, I do not wish to accept your abuse, so the abuse belongs to you. The man then realized this truth and bowed to the Buddha's feet in forgiveness. The Buddha told him there was no need for forgiveness and asked the man to sit with them in discussion. The man soon after became a monk, just like his brother.

Such a simple story, but the implications are tremendously powerful! The Buddha was being verbally and physically abused and managed to fix the problem without becoming angry in the least bit. This is not surprising though because an awakened one will never become angry. But let us not place the Buddha on a pedal stool and act like we too cannot awaken to this simple realization today; that when we are angry at something or someone else, we are only hurting ourselves and making our lives that much more difficult than they already are. When we truly realize this simple fact, the doors of real lasting and powerful change will open wide."

"You will not be punished for your anger, you will be punished by your anger. - Buddha

I disagree that an awakened one will never become angry moreso they are less likely to become angry. Ego is one of the byproducts of humanity it is a great tool of the consciousness but a terrible master.

I really enjoyed it. Though, I suspect it played a large role in my dreams this morning. Lots of habits, emotions and feelings that I didn't know I had. Bullying someone, fighting some "bad guys" and ending up more violent than they ever were. Didn't find it too pleasant though and focused on the central channel instead.

I saw a road on the edge of a slope, with a mountain ridge in the background. There was a white / grey van coming down the road while we were exploring the place. There was a lot of noise on the foreground, some people talking. I think it was somewhere in Hungary. Everything looked incredibly vivid and detailed. Woke up when I realised what was going on.

Tried again. This time I saw what looked like a dormitory. I was looking through an open door to a corridor. A guy ran in, in a hurry. He was looking for a WC. I think there was no noise on this one. Not as many details as on the previous one. The most important part seemed to be his face. Woke up again.

Friday, August 12, 2011

Inevitable rainfall

Not the brightest day.


When I have started coming home, the rain has always stopped so far. Today it didn't.


A friend offered a lift. Still attempted to lessen the rainfall. Managed to reduce it, but it took effort to keep it that way.


It stopped raining when I was at home. It's the time I've usually left from work. So, I just left early =D. Aand about half an hour later (about the time it would take me to walk home) .. it's raining again.


For some reason, it occasionally marks a random video "watched" that I haven't watched. Sometimes it has been an amazing find and I've really enjoyed these videos that I'm claimed to have already watched, but sometimes they seem rather pointless.


Weird, there's a circular hole in the ceiling of my mouth. It sometimes hurts, but I don't have a clue how it got there. =?

Thursday, August 11, 2011

Strange dreams

Practised some Trataka on the projection clock yesterday. It started to feel really pleasant at the heart chakra. It popped into mind that I have been keeping it off because it feels too good to be confident enough that I can control the psi during dreams.

Had some strange dreams this morning.

Yesterday my mind once drifted to a memory of how a friend often dreams of helping me with girls. A few seconds of this drifting thought must've been enough to cause the following dream.

I was at a lecture or a conference or something, I don't know. I wasn't paying much attention, thinking something in a relaxed position, feet stretched out. Then suddenly I realised that I had been so deep in my thoughts that it hadn't occurred to me that there's someone who wants to get past me. I had just been staring at her without realising there's anyone there. Apologised and let her through. Even though she went to the same school with some of us there, no-one else had noticed her before I brought it up. She looked like the girl I fell in love with back in high school. Probably the only symbol for the subconscious mind to use for this purpose.

Somehow she got stuck with me. We were at the summerhouse, watching TV. I think it was Christmas, because there were candles in a corner of the room. Someone told me to put the candles out. I blew them out (I think there were 2 or 3), but failed on the last one (4th). Blew it out, but it was close to a curtain, which caught fire. Quickly tore the piece out of the curtain and stopped the flame in my right hand. It hurt, but when I looked at it, it was dirty with grim but perfectly healthy.

There happened to be a scene on the TV, where the camera showed an old castle from the outside. There were 3 outdoor candles and an open door at the back. I blew the candles out by blowing at the TV screen. To me it looked as if there were a candle inside as well (the doorway was lit from the inside and the light flickered). I attempted to blow that out as well, but it didn't work. Someone later showed me the reason - it was not candle light, it was a reflection from an electrical light source.

It's interesting, because I haven't dreamt of and I haven't even thought of pyrokinesis for *scratches head* 3 weeks.

In the next dream I saw my sister. I haven't seen a dream with her for months. She was living somewhere else She wanted something, but I couldn't understand it. Due to this, I acted wrong from that perspective.

Tuesday, August 9, 2011

Yin vs Yang

While discussing the haunty stuff with father, a theory popped up. I brought up the subject of Yin and Yang energies. Well, I've usually been pretty skeptical about the existence of two types of energy with the opposite characteristics. Dad asked: "Why would you think there's two types of energy? Isn't one of them just a lack of the other?"

Although it's often referred to as two types of energy, what if it is really just one? And we can move that one when there are contrasts, that is, there are regions where there's more psi and regions where there's less. Then psi would be sucked to the region where there's less, causing a similar effect as to one region being cold and pulling while the other hot and pushing.

I think it now makes sense why I didn't succeed in practicing pk without causing any contrasts in psi density in my body. That way there's no flow.

Weekend trip

Had a meeting with a couple of old friends (an old friend and his brother). We are planning to visit a haunted house on Friday. His brother had spoken about this to a clairvoyant girl from India. She had immediately refused to come and advised for him not to go there either. She had said that this ghost has harmful intentions and is best to be left alone. She had also told him that he's amazingly skeptical towards all of this, but when something is going change him, it's gonna be tough. That's the main reason why he's going for that haunted house, I think.

I slightly nudged our discussion towards pk. It was pretty fun and they seemed to be interested in this stuff. For some reason though, when I either talk about this stuff with someone new or someone skeptical, I soon get cold and start shaking but really excited at the same time.

Discussed it with dad as well. He suggested us to avoid resonating with what the ghost brings up. The ghost almost has no power alone.

Monday, August 8, 2011

In pain

Today no longer felt different.

Today morning I had the most amazing levitation dream I've had this far. I think I stumbled at first and found that I was descending slower than "normal". Practiced it some behind the corner and went to show it to Kevin. He said "That's nothing yet. Go higher." After some trials, I could levitate to the height of a tree that was next to us. Descending was rather clumsy due to some ego issues. Almost lost my balance. So, I reached the ground again and he said "Now fly forward and lift off at a sharp angle." When I finally managed to do it, only then did he agree on flying with me.

While at work, my heart and throat chakras suddenly "exploded". So far I haven't experienced anything more painful. For maybe 20 or 30 minutes, every breath and heartbeat triggered strong pain in my chest. The pain then decreased and psi left for the head and I started feeling a lot better. I could then move the body while only suffering from mild pain, so I took a short break. Well, I'm still alive =). Felt rather floaty and occasionally had cold psi rushing around in the body.

It would've been better if I had seen it coming and had started meditating on my bottleneck chakras. I didn't. It still hurts a bit, but I think it's good, because this way I can feel the amount of psi going through. Though, I don't think I should go practicing levitation or some heavy energy cultivation any time soon. Which is exactly what I would want to do because of that dream.

Sunday, August 7, 2011

Different

Today feels different. Everything feels somehow different. I can't recognize the old places as they are in my memory, I can't recognize myself. I could tell that all people felt it, as they acted different as well.

It feels almost as if an End of the World has ended and everything has been reborn.

Heard that a couple of nights ago there had been strong Northern Lights. Well, I obviously missed it .. I think I was sleeping at that time. Maybe that's why. Don't know, but it sure feels a lot different.

Before going to sleep yesterday, I tried levitation again. That felt different too, it felt a lot more real than it ever has. The sound of weight being lifted off the bed springs, the floaty feeling of weighing less and less. Maybe that's why. Don't know either.

Went to see the Amway advertisement of a dad's friend. I was quite skeptical and didn't like it there at first, strange smirk on my face and lamps blinking. At some point I realized it actually doesn't make a difference where I am. It's a lousy excuse to feel comfortable in one place and uncomfortable in another. Even though my exciting game development process was interrupted with this, I can still be content with everything that is.

Took a sneak back to home, with a camera. The sky was covered in a mist-like cloud at first, sun illuminating a part of it. While taking pictures, I fancied more sun shining through. A minute or two later, a spiral-like hole had appeared in the part that had been illuminated.
Remnants of the cloud spiral
The more I stared into the sky, the more interesting clouds I found. Just like it happens in the dreams. Whatever you look at, materializes to the expectations.
Neat shapes

Minced cloud

Griddy cloud

Dithered clouds

And just a picture I liked
These might be normal but in my opinion cool anyway =).

Ah, one thing I forgot. I've had a slight headache today and remembered now that I practiced some energy cultivation before falling asleep. There were strong and dense currents of psi going through my spine, the top of my head, the back of my head as well as forehead. Maybe that also played a role..

Saturday, August 6, 2011

None of that ever happened

Wind was blowing some sort of a paper thing around on the road. Managed to lift it for a sec.
The stuff that flies from dandelion flowers, that's also good to fly around with.
That stuff (the seeds)

Was geisting HardFaults on electronics at work again. There's a board and software that I'm testing before radiation tests. Its output showed quite a lot of watchdog resets and real-time clock time skew events. There were distinct time periods when these anomalies occurred very frequently. For most of the time, there were no anomalies.

I've often come to notice that when I look at the memory leds blinking, they sometimes stop blinking for a longer time period (time skew) or I would see it resetting. What's strange about it, when I later check the data, I see that none of what I saw actually happened (perfectly normal operation during that time). Quantum mechanics sure is weird.

Also, I sometimes found that some of my code had disappeared. No trace of it (couldn't undo it back) except for my memory.

This time-skew effect I've seen before. When I look at the seconds on a clock on the wall or on PC screen, it sometimes stops for multiple seconds and then jumps by multiple digits.

Thursday, August 4, 2011

Night jogging

Went night-jogging with father yesterday.

The quality of dreams had a boost, psi flow is a lot better now and I'm no longer as tired as I was before.

Edit: I'm still quite tired. Laid down and practised some OBE.

Mom and sister are travelling around and exploring paranormal communities in US. Psychics, alien abductees, people communicating with angels and stuff. Well, they've been there for quite a while already. Mom had made a reading for someone, most of which has come true. Some of it still lies ahead. Sister said there's always some weird clouds following them so that they always come with thunder. Cool..

Wednesday, August 3, 2011

Dad as light as a feather

Meditated on Alar32 and his relationship with his father a couple of days ago. Visualized bringing light to them. It felt ok until I stopped it. Then it felt like it bumped back to how it was before.

While coming home yesterday, I targeted an advertisement. Wind was blowing it so that it looked like a sail bouncing back and forth. Held it bulged away from me for some time, then reversed it and held it bulged towards me. Applied stasis and it stood still without moving in the wind.

Yesterday dad said he had forgotten to eat at work, took a bus home and when he stepped off, he had difficulties sticking to the ground. He felt so light that he was afraid of levitating in front of all the people. Cool..

Finished the series of "Taken" yesterday. I was pretty tired at work today again.

Had an interesting dream today morning. I managed to pause it, wake up, glance at the clock and resume it for a few times. I was practicing levitation in the dream, having some difficulties with belief again. In that dream I did levitate, but I was afraid to do it without holding onto something.

Monday, August 1, 2011

Stuff falling

Spielberg's "Taken" is pretty ingenious. Watched most of the episodes with dad during the weekend. Dad said he's beginning to understand how the minds of military generals work and why the Greys treated people like animals. I find Elle's comments quite enlightening.

Was quite tired today morning. Had a lot of trouble with yawning, eyes falling shut and what not. During one of these inconvenient moments loud noise broke loose as spoons, mugs and dishes started falling into the sink. Seemed rather strange, because the windows were barely open and there was barely any air movement in the room. Also, it had been 10 minutes or more since anyone had gone anywhere near that sink. The shelves behind me made a loud pop some seconds after that event.

Noticed that the clock was 11.11 the 2nd time I glanced at it. Also, it's August 1st. Finished a pack of cookies and when I was about to throw the paper into the garbage bin, I noticed that the "best before" date was 1/11/11.

Had a deja vu of a situation that didn't manifest again. The emotion that seemed to have caused it, came from the dreams I had today morning. I'm glad it didn't happen.

While reading Alar34's journal and after that, furniture was snapping all over the apartment.

Talked to dad about the dishes that fell into the sink at work. A moment later we were about to watch the next episode of "Taken", which happened to be called "Dropping the dishes". Stuff was still snapping loud during the film.

Friday, July 29, 2011

Clear but tired

My mind was surprisingly clear (even though tired) yesterday morning.

The printed papers were flying again yesterday .. it was windy.
Applied a heavy stasis-field construct on them. No papers were lifted. I let the construct disintegrate and the next set of printed papers started flying again.

Dark clouds were gathering and making thunder. All of them broke apart before reaching us.

Watched "Sorcerer's Apprentice" and had a discussion with father at night. Learned a lot.

Had no difficulties waking up this morning. My mind was surprisingly clear again (even more clear than yesterday).

While walking past the beach, I looked at people playing volleyball. Visualized how they would move and hit the ball. Found it amazing how well it went.

Tuesday, July 26, 2011

Yoga in physics building

Nice, there was a hatha yoga class going on in the physics building lounge. The lady told me it was full .. maybe next time. Pretty cheery that they arrange these things in that building =).

Monday, July 25, 2011

Pk on volume

I was thinking what to practice pk on so that I could get dad to practice too. There's an old music station that dad wanted to try again. It only works on pk. It's impossible to decrease the volume via buttons or remote alone. Also, during frequency tuning it keeps throwing random equalizer settings, always choosing for more bass.

So, we practiced lowering the volume for some time.

Sunday, July 24, 2011

Seagull control

While in the kitchen yesterday, we opened all the windows to let some cool and humid air in. There were birds flying around. I targeted a seagull, who was flying towards us. Tried to have it keep its flying direction. It occasionally thought of turning away, but decided not to .. continued flying in our direction. I moved back, because it really seemed as if it were flying in. Then just before flying in the open window, it turned away. A pretty scene =).

Saturday, July 23, 2011

Geisting objects

There's a nice thundery-rainy weather today.

Dad came back from the balcony. I happened to look back at the balcony and saw a light blue object next to dad. It disappeared. Told him about it and we went back to the balcony. A moment later we saw a balloon fall down from the balcony of one of the neighbours. Thought that was what I had seen - not possible, because it couldn't have floated back. \me puzzled :S.

A similar thing happened last week. I looked to the balcony and saw a cloth flapping over to my balcony with almost no wind. It came from the direction of father's balcony. There were usually clothes drying, so I looked over the edge, hoping to find one that would look like the one that I had seen. None similar. What was even more weird, even if there were, it wouldn't have reached my balcony due to the wall between the balconies (a lot of distance, provided that nothing phases through the wall).

Proposed an attempt to slow down the falling of raindrops. Drops became smaller and fell slower. Dad proposed to manifest lightning strikes. Approached it as if it were a tough one and concentrated on the image and sound of lightning. At some point I let go, blinked my eye and *flash* .. *thunder*. Though, it didn't strike the way I had visualized.

Creating objects

The other shadow was due to reflection.

One morning there were birds flying away from me, dogs barking at me again. Focused on the all permeating light (previously called yellow light - was white this time). I became brighter. A while ago I saw a dream where a strong storm broke a pear tree and it nearly fell on me (missed me by a couple of inches). This time I saw a dream where the fallen pear tree was covered in green grass and pretty flowers.

Yesterday evening we were discussing the weird with dad. Attempted to create an object in a dream today morning. I focused on an image of some steel object in an abstract shape. As I focused on the image, it became sharper and appeared. Focused on it some more, making it more solid. Took it in my hands and focused on it becoming even more solid. Wondering if it was solid enough, I tried to alter the shape of it, morphing a steel fork out of the object. So, it was tangible, but not solid enough to be difficult to shape.

Dug up some old pencils and erasers and started drawing. It's interesting how everything that takes shape on paper, has a feeling to it as if it these objects were real. When there's someone sitting on grass, you can feel them sitting as well as the grass blades bent around them. Feels pretty much the same as creating that weird object in the dream.

Future skyscrapers
A cleaner version with orbs:

Wednesday, July 20, 2011

Dual shadows

Watched Harry Potter Deathly Hallows 1 with dad yesterday evening. Meditated after that.

Somehow this meditation session made me more gloomy from the inside. I was on my way to work, morning sun shining at my back, when I saw myself have 2 shadows. The "real" shadow and another more transparent one on my left. When I became consciously aware of it, it faded out and disappeared.

Birds were afraid of my psi field today. They always flew away to my left from a distance of at least 6 meters (compared to the 30 cm from a few days ago). For some reason, I even look rather dark to myself. I wonder if it's related to watching Harry Potter or my meditation session.

I guess we can't watch Deathly Hallows 2 soon, because the computer's broken. Windows was occasionally throwing Blue Screen, so we decided to run a memtest and it wore the broken RAM out even more.

Listened to uncle's enlightening music and meditated. I want to start drawing pictures when I have time.

Saturday, July 16, 2011

Robotex friends

Bumped into one of my friends, who is building a robot for the next Robotex. They asked me to help them with one of their PCBs after work.. Basically a 18 hour workday and got to sleep at 2 AM, which is why I don't want to participate in Robotex anymore. 8 hours the next morning and we got the PCB more-or-less ready.


p>When walking home the first night, I easily managed to clear my mind, because most of it was already sleeping. Laying down in bed felt pretty OBE-ish. Fell asleep with an intense flow of psi penetrating the ceiling of my mouth.


The next day, one guy was listening to the radio. Well, there was a pretty queer song playing and we didn't quite like it. *silence*. The guy asked: "What did you do?" Another one answered: "I just stopped it with my mind."


Some hours later, we couldn't commit the changes from that computer, because there was no Internet connection. So, the radio had stopped because the Ethernet cable had somehow crawled out of the socket.


Hijacked the mind of one of the guys, making them perform operations that I intended them to. Simple commands (which stemmed from emotions rather than some intelligent reasoning) seemed to be a bit easier to relay. For him, it might've seemed like he dozed off or something and realizing it when the other guy asked him what he was doing.


We finished routing. Looked out of the window. There was a nice big cloud swimming towards my right at a pretty fast pace. Applied stasis on it, made it stop and drift farther away from me. Stopped it again, which caused it to break apart quickly. It was instantaneous and effortless.


While coming home, I suddenly felt that my throat hurt so bad that I couldn't swallow. Some sort of a painful knot had appeared in the upper-throat. I immediately thought I must've caught cold, which usually happens pretty often when the body is exhausted.


Visualized psi spiralling up the throat. As I was walking past a certain boulder that I'm attempting to roll out from the ground each morning, I tried to move it again. This made the spiralling psi flow more intense and the next time I swallowed (maybe 15 seconds later), the pain had totally disappeared. As if the pain had only been my imagination.


Thursday, July 14, 2011

Vacation in dreams

Took a pk vacation in my dreams last night. Chilled around with friends and family at some foreign hotel, enjoyed sauna and went swimming. Before waking up, heavy clouds started pulsing in the sky (pulsing blue, just like hi-density psi causes camera recordings to go blue). Took cover and watched birds flying away. A chicken flew with them, but what really puzzled me was that it flew completely without flapping its wings. My uncle tried to explain it to me, but it didn't actually explain anything - illogical attempt to prove it was nothing weird.

Woke up, feeling a lot more refreshed than in the previous mornings. I still feel tired, but it's .. different somehow.

Last night there was a mosquito in the bedroom. My mind, being all sticky, it focused on the buzzing, bringing more of it into my room. When I finally managed to fully focus my mind away from it, it disappeared. This seems to have been working pretty well for the last few months.

While practicing pranayama yesterday night, I started seeing a white rectangle with a darker spot near the left edge. The more held my breath, the closer and sharper the rectangle became. I don't know what it was, but it disappeared when I stopped practicing with my left nostril and took the other one. Performing the exercise on both nostrils didn't bring this rectangle back.

Wednesday, July 13, 2011

A little bit of kundalini

Slept 1 hour extra today morning. Well, I don't think it makes much difference whether it's 6 or 7 hours anyway. Mainly because I seem to be continuing with the day's work while sleeping. Although it helps me to solve work problems quickly, it's pretty exhausting.

While walking to work, a little sparrow surprised me. I didn't notice it and it didn't fly away even though it was maybe about 30 cm from where I stepped.

Experienced a small Kundalini awakening (root turning cold and heat rising from it) and felt sick for a moment, until the blockages cleared. Couldn't take my time off due to inconvenient timing.

Took a nap when I arrived at home. My awareness kept moving away from the body, swinging and swaying out. Somehow woke up 3 hours later, feeling lightweight and shifty without remembering the rest of the day (took some time).

Got a small pot, filled it with water and threw a small pencil into the water. Practiced moving it around, holding it in stasis and pushing it underwater with dad. Shared some of my enthusiasm by proposing ideas of what we could try.

It seems kind of weird to me that he considers a lot of this stuff as too advanced for him, however, he has performed pk feats that I have only dreamt of.

Tuesday, July 12, 2011

Geisting friend

There's one thing I have wanted to learn with pk .. to cause objects to vibrate and go in resonance. Took out a bronze bowl from India, placed it on a chair and wanted to practice making it vibrate with father's help. He considered it too difficult though. Couldn't get it vibrate enough to make any sounds. Saw some psi moving around inside the bowl and around it.

Was rather tired today. Multiple days of going to sleep late and waking up early.

Woke up, it started raining. Stopped raining when I went to work. It started raining again and more heavily when I was inside. Erik arrived while it was raining.

Window was open. Printed something out. Then Erik went to print out a few pages .. all the pages started flying around, each in a different direction. One made a somarsault and hid behind the table. A "WTF" smile appeared on his face. we laughed it off. He then checked if there was any wind coming from the window, but there didn't seem to be any (not to me, at least).

Left for a meeting at a restaurant. It was raining. While at the table, waiter brought glasses of icecream cocktail. I could tell that the waiter was new and afraid of spilling some coctail. Praised him in my mind. He got to the other end of the table, where Erik was sitting ::Click:: ..... *Splash*. Somehow all the glasses had tipped over and the coctail was all spilled over the table and Erik. I thought I had seen the waiter hold the salver steady while the glasses tipped over. This one felt pretty weird and kind of sad, too. For some reason, suspicious accidents seem to happen around me pretty frequently when I'm tired.

He said the coctail didn't leave a spot. We had a 20% discount and sun was shining when we left.

Saturday, July 9, 2011

Be ye the master of all that surrounds thee

Father said he's about to learn to use psychokinesis and that earlier he had just been interested in what's possible and how stuff works (which would be useful for his scientific research). I guess it's about time to reformulate my own goals as well, based on advice from Thoth's tablets.

Be ye the master of all that surrounds thee.
Never be mastered by the effects of thy life.

Yesterday when I was about to open a can of tuna fish, the fear of injuring myself with the can cover appeared. It dates some years back when I was tired and in a haste, tore a can of preserved meal open and seriously cut my finger. Even months later when it had seemingly healed, it was painful to move it to the full extent. Needed a lot of healing with psi and intent. I was afraid of opening the can even though it had a sign that it's safe for dolphins .. well, obviously not for humans.

Father came and opened it. He suggested visualizing every action before making it happen. When I did, I found how foolish my fear was. Anyway, should start using this method for everything. He also said he doesn't use it because of any practical reasons .. it just feels good to see everything manifesting the way they were visualized.

Wednesday, July 6, 2011

Funeral

Slept on hay in open air, which was pretty refreshing. Alarm clock rang, cancelled it and fell into a half-dream state. Back in December a dog passed away (Circling Flames post). It appeared in the half-dream state, really happy to see me .. swinging its tail, smiling, licking my fingers and lying on me while I was sleeping.

Today was the funeral of grandma's brother. Although it seemed out of place, I think I did the right thing by emitting cheerful feelings when most people were shedding tears in grief of their loss. One should not be lost in their emotions, but rather use their emotions for productive purposes. Dad seemed to be taking it pretty well, he was at least as cheery as I was. The son of the passed-one was also calm and in good control of his emotions.

In the church, the priest was clearly pulsing a candle behind him. Attempted to light a candle and didn't succeed, but perhaps it was better this way. Might've caused a havoc among people afraid of something satanic going on, body rising up from the coffin or something even more freaky (especially because due to some hassle and confusion, we didn't even know if there was the right man in the coffin before opening it).

When we arrived at the church, the sky was all clouded. Intended for it to clear up for the departure to the graveyard, which it did. The sky was completely clear by the time we arrived.

Orb hunting

Came to the funeral with father. Read Thoth Tablets and discussed them during our bus ride. Also enjoyed feeling the surroundings and other people on the bus. There was a girl, who smoked a lot (one cigarette every hour). I felt her loving the feeling of smoke in her lungs (quite surreal as I never smoke myself).

When we arrived, the sky was heavily clouded. Little meteo-pro Caspar predicted that it would be raining any minute. True, a couple of minutes later, I was hit by some lonely water drops. I had planned to go orb-hunting, so I tried my best to keep it from raining.

Went orb-hunting with dad at night. We found some, though, I suspect at least some of the spots on pictures were the reflection of hay dust (could see the particles when flash was triggered). There seemed to be more on open areas. Sometimes I just felt an urge to take a picture in some direction .. took it .. and there was a bright orb right at the center of the picture. Took about 100 pics in total, need to process them and delete some.

Added a separate page for them, here.

Tuesday, July 5, 2011

Mortal empathy

Experienced a really strong empathy on my way home today. Birds singing, hopping around me, trees "shining peace and love" .. ::SPLAT:: a bug crashed into my left eye. Blinded for about a kilometer, I was disturbed from empathy again.

Sunday, July 3, 2011

Rain tilting

A heavy cloud appeared with thunder and lots of rain. Went out on the balcony and tilted the raining direction. Got it almost horizontal, made rain fall straight down and tilted it again .. this time to a 45 degree angle. On both attempts, wind picked up, trees bent and the direction of rainfall was affected.

Went to bed. Out of nowhere I started swinging in body. Swung back and forth with an amplitude of maybe 2 cm. Tried to improve the amplitude by pushing further like one would do on an ordinary swing. Didn't work .. there was absolutely no gravity .. *ahem* .. no force to pull me back.


It felt almost exactly like it would, when I lied down on my back on a village swing. It felt like levitating, falling down, levitating and so on..
Imagine lying on your back while swinging on this.
Feels pretty interesting.

Pleasant buzzing

I was feeling a bit down and stressed yesterday for some reason. Meditated on a lot of different things yesterday night:
  • Focusing on the pleasant feeling of wind gently touching the skin in 27*C
  • Pulling and pushing psi through the third eye
  • Moving psi up from lower chakras
  • Breathing psi into the central channel and building a dense pillar of psi in the channel while breathing out
Tried to sleep in such a way that I wouldn't lose psi. Today morning, my whole body felt calm and tingling of pleasure again. It feels good already even though I'm not done with the cleaning yet.

One of my aunts called yesterday. They were about to print the death wish, but the name turned out all caps and they couldn't change it back. They could write lowercase text everywhere else, but couldn't delete or modify the name (confirmed with MS Office on 2 different laptops).

Saturday, July 2, 2011

Geisting on shockwave plugin

Uh, wtf =S. Wanted to listen to music. Opened one of my youtube playlists .. flash plugin window is pitch black. It was working just a moment ago. Ok, I decide that a radio might be better anyway and download a radio app. It installs just fine and everything, but it doesn't run for some reason.

Well, I decided not to listen to music then. iJodix posted a youtube link. I thought it wouldn't work anyway, because something had happened to the plugin. It was black, as expected. He posted another link that was supposed to explain it better. The second one was working. Checked and the plugin only seems to be working for the second video that iJodix posted.

Cool, now they are all working again and I can listen to my playlist.

One of the dreams stood out this morning. I couldn't trace its sources (didn't seem to be based on memories). There was some sort of an automatic driving system with distributed computing. Managed to forget most of it due to the next dreams.

It reminded me of one of dad's dreams some weeks ago. He saw a crane that had a web of tiny fingers that contracted around the object. It was made in such a way that it required power to keep the fingers apart, but no power was needed for gripping.

A close relative has died. He looked pretty depressed and alone the last time I saw him.