Welcome

The goal of this blog is to motivate myself and others for further practice as well as provide details that might explain what's going on..


Monday, November 29, 2010

Connecting and non-linearity

I feel almost completely normal now - the discomfort that was caused because of my body not being used to the Bindu fluid has faded. The feeling of being high (or what I previously called pk mind-state) has also grown slightly less-frequent (it was almost constant before). Well, it seems to come back stronger when I attempt pk.

Got motivated for practicing push, pull on different objects after seeing this video yesterday (I think owltwelve had found it). There's a guy who has been practicing ChosonNinja's Ki blast and tipped a book over with it.

Attempted pk on a few notebooks on top of the psi-wheel box near my bed. After a short while of concentrating on it, I felt more connected than I have felt before. As I did, I felt I was sliding off and falling down. This feeling of falling down snapped me back .. well, nothing seemed to have happened although it felt quite intense.

Tried pk on that small piece of wood and radiometer again today. Well, when I set up the radiometer, it spun really slow for maybe half an hour and then finally took its full speed (I was doing homework and occasionally just looked at it, attempting to stop it).

When I looked at that piece of wood, attempting to admire it in a similar manner to how owltwelve described he does. I started feeling and seeing space bending around it and felt it becoming closer as I focused on it. It felt and looked as if I were making a low-psi-density channel to the object, while rising the psi density of surrounding areas. Part of my consciousness seemed to have been "sucked" through the low-density channel then. The upper half of my body gradually got colder and the lower half getting hotter. I was sweating. Haven't experienced it this strong before.

A new guy joined the forums and posted a link to a cool site: wingmakers.co.nz. Judging by what is written about chakras on the levitation page, it seems like the author knew what he was writing.

Saturday, November 27, 2010

Better balanced

Lately I have started to feel the effect of this pranayama exercise that owltwelve had posted on the forums a while ago (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gvtx62lUho0). I think I didn't do it right at first - the stomach pumps were too rapid and shallow. When done in the correct way, I started feeling out of breath quickly, my body started sweating and I occasionally took a few breaths without breathing (I felt breath coming back and organs being supplied with oxygen even though I didn't breathe any air).

For almost the whole evening yesterday I practiced my right hemisphere by intending on it becoming as strong as the left one. I also visualized writing, painting and doing all kind of stuff with my left hand as well. While asleep, I continued with it as well as I could.

Today morning I felt weird, but weird in a different way. So far I haven't had any pain strikes or feelings of discomfort and everything feels balanced better. I guess I can focus on the Bindu point without worries again. Uhm, nope, when I focus on the Bindu, I can still feel that my right hemisphere is somewhat behind schedule.

Yesterday I also attempted pk on the temperature sensor again. It only rose by 1 degree, but I noticed something interesting. I could easily feel the sensor hanging in the air and move it around (as it moved around, the wire sometimes slid on the edge of the table). When I attempted to create a hot-spot, I immediately saw transparent slightly white psi moving towards the point and curling around it. There was more psi moving around my hands (a turbulent kind of moving with vortexes and stuff). I hadn't seen it this clearly before.

Friday, November 26, 2010

Getting used to the fluid

Discussed this Bindu fluid experience with my father and he considered everything that feels cold as a bad omen. Though, I think that when body becomes used to it, it should still result in warm feelings.

Meditated on visualizing the fluid becoming warm and golden yesterday. This didn't seem to have much effect. 

Then I opened heart and throat chakras up a bit more and focused a flow of psi on something I thought would be the Lalana chakra. I was a bit surprised that I quickly found what felt like the right spot to direct psi into.

Tried Khechari mudra as well and again, without prior experience, I was surprised at how far my tongue stretched. A moment later, there was a quite intense flow of psi into the Lalana chakra. Felt a lot better after this short meditation - my mind was more silent and there was a feeling of warmth spreading across the spine (instead of the previous feeling of cold spreading). Now I could actually feel a sweet taste in my mouth.

Opened heart and throat chakras a bit more while going to school in the morning. As I opened my throat chakra some more, I felt a familiar rush of cold fluid down the neck again. It seems that when this fluid gets stuck behind a chakra or two, it will cause discomfort and occasional strikes of pain in the regions associated with these chakras.

Meditated and performed khechari mudra some more. I noticed that I can only feel the sensation of that cold fluid flowing in the left half of my body. I think it's related to my right hemisphere being weaker than the left one. I have forgotten to practice pk while focusing on the right hemisphere. I wonder if this means that the right side of my body has already grown used to the fluid while the left side has not? Hm, being both-handed would make things easier, I guess. =D Need to become strong enough to be able to do push-ups on one hand only. Yup, with exercise, the feeling of cold disappears.

Thursday, November 25, 2010

OBE step

Watched a few youtube videos this morning and I was a bit surprised at how well I was able to feel the people on some of these videos.

It was snowing outside again, but I thought it would be cool if there were sun shining. Decided to attempt to bring sunshine through the clouds and snowfall while walking to school. Some 10 - 20 minutes after embarking on the journey, I could see shadows on the snow relief. Cracks had formed into the clouds and a little bit of sunlight was shining through.

While walking, I felt like I was pushing myself forward with pk and at the same time somehow lessening the probability of slipping. I felt really light and walking was completely effortless.

Lately, I have always been feeling sort of high or slightly out of body and it occasionally peaks up resulting in what feels like a partial OBE (There were only some bodyparts that I wasn't in or from which awareness had moved out).

However, this time I had an experience that felt like completely stepping out of my body while walking. I remember taking a step and having a full OBE-like feeling at the same time. It was like the feeling of reality collapsed (psi density rose and I felt something like a non-linearity in space and time) and a part of me falling forward while another part stepping forward normally. After this one step, I was back in body again, a bit confused. This feeling of non-linearity in space and time is what I have been calling "feeling high" before - one may feel the same in a deep fever (feels as if space and time were wobbling around them).

When I thought about it, it had also happened before (1 or 2 years ago) when I was walking home from school. Though, back then the experience was not this intense.

I think it was related to the Bindu point, because that's where the OBE-like feeling seemed to have started from.

Took another semi-successful attempt on cracking the clouds at the first lecture.

Have been feeling short pain strikes and feelings of discomfort in random places around the body today. Also, my heart occasionally beats rapidly and pretty strong. Perhaps my body hasn't gotten used to the fluid or something. I don't feel an increase in psi density in channels / chakras, so I guess this hasn't changed much. During the second lecture, a tiny cold ball got formed in my left hand, I dissolved it just in case (seemed to have blocked a channel or something - my left shoulder started twitching when it appeared).

One more thing I have noticed during the past couple of weeks - I'm having difficulties sitting in a bad pose, as I feel disturbed when psi flow and the flow of some fluids is hindered. I start to feel bad (or even slightly sick) when I sit in a bad pose for too long.

Guess I should meditate on a blank mind for a while again.

Wednesday, November 24, 2010

Pk dream on peanut

Had a cool dream this morning.

There were 2 of us sitting in a lounge. From there, open doorways led to about 3 other rooms. In one of them, a janitor was wiping the floor. It looked all dark, dusty and rather gloomy .. I wanted to cheer the guy sitting next to me.

I noticed that there were a few peanuts in the pile of dust that the janitor had wiped together. Chose one and moved it across the floor up to the other person sitting next to me. Nudged his shoe with it, flew it across the room and had it climb up the wall. I was amazed at how easy it all was in the dream. Managed to entertain him and cheer up a little.

Bindu fluid

Felt too tired for pk practice yesterday evening and went to bed early. I had probably caught some cold with my left ear and hands, so I healed them a little.

While walking to school, I occasionally focused on the Bindu point. For most of the time, my mind was busy with homework.

In the first (and last) lecture today morning, I got a couple of slight pain strikes in the head. Really short pinches that didn't hurt much. A few moments after that, I started feeling a cold liquid flowing down from somewhere around the Bindu point. It flowed down some channel behind the throat (I could swallow and it didn't affect the flow). It reached the chest and got distributed all over the chest area as well as hands. The flow of the liquid stopped at the bottom of my stomach.

I had read somewhere that when it reaches Manipura, it burns up in there. I also remember having read something like when it flows through the throat chakra, it becomes purified and that when non-purified, the liquid is poisonous or something. So, I wanted to direct it back into the head after it had gone through the throat. While visualizing this, it naturally made a knot below the throat.

Although I felt the vapor of this liquid filling my lungs, mouth and nostrils, I couldn't sense any sweet taste (like described in the texts I had read on this subject).

The feeling either weakened or I became more used to it so that I couldn't feel it very well after the lecture. It happened at a slightly uncomfortable time, because we were just doing homework for another subject during the lecture (two things to pay attention at the same time and then a third appeared - this fluid).

The fluid or even its flow is still there - I can feel it when I move or bend myself. 

Sunday, November 21, 2010

Temperature fail

Couldn't change the temperature reading much today (less than 2 degrees). There's still something about it that I haven't realized yet. I think I couldn't feel the sensor heating up very well this time.

Tiring myself out at the gym might have affected it. 

I think maybe it would be better to keep doing it when it's already going, no matter how late it is. Perhaps this way I could remember the feeling of it better next day.

Tried it again later and managed to slightly move the sensor around in the air instead of changing temperature. I was having difficulties visualizing the feeling of heat again.

Temperature sensor

I figured that I should use something new or relatively from my room for pk practice. So, I took a multimeter with a temperature sensor. I have attempted pk on it before, but there was no noticeable effect (the effect was less than one digit).

Room temperature was 22 degrees Celsius. At first I tried to make a construct around the sensor tip and then program it to be hot. Not much of an effect. I tried different kind of visualizations for the feeling of hot (bonfire, stove, Sun, a tool that resembles a hairdryer but heats up to several hundred degrees - don't know its name). Not much of an effect.

Then something happened (which happens pretty often, but so far I didn't associate it with pk), my pupils grew narrower and everything got darker. The object now stood out from the background and I could easily see this light transparent haze around it. From the corner of my left eye, I noticed that every time I entered this state, the digits on the display changed - no matter what I visualized, temperature rose quickly.

I got it from 22 to 25 degrees Celsius in maybe 10 minutes, I guess. I think I could've gone further, but it was late already and my eyes started getting tired (of watching Dragon ball the whole day =). Every time I slipped from that pk state, something came to mind or I became excited, the digits immediately started to drop. It was nice, how fast the feedback was.

Before playing with temperature, I tried measuring alternating voltage from the air, but found it disappointing - too much electromagnetic waves flying around. If I even managed to affect it, I would have to do it to a pretty large degree in order to notice anything from the background noise.

Saturday, November 20, 2010

Psi pressure vs frequency

Gathered some psi in the morning and meditated after that. It popped into my mind that perhaps control over psi works somewhat similar to how solids work - the more dense the solid, the higher frequencies it takes to make it resonant. For example, it takes a pretty low frequency sound (roughly around 3 kHz) to make a sandstone wobble and it might take roughly around 30 MHz or more to make a diamond wobble in resonance.

Now if one is so full of psi that it would require too high frequencies for them to control it, they are having difficulties with it. I guess that's why I have found it easier to practice pk after a psi "explosion" - when I have blown away excessive psi.

However, when one becomes able to control higher and higher frequencies, they can take bigger amounts of psi pressure and use them. Also, perhaps the higher frequencies are used, the more effectively one is able to perform pk (similarly to radio transmission, there could be a lot of noise at lower frequencies). I'm not sure how it would apply to making big and slow psi waves that could also be needed, but I think that by controlling phase and frequency accurately enough, one should also be able to make low frequency waves out of high frequency.

Though, it could well be that psi doesn't behave like electromagnetic waves and thus has none of these limits. Just an idea that popped into mind while meditating.

Watched Dragon ball episode 148 today and there was something I had never seen in any film nor anime before. After defeating evil Piccolo Daimao, Goku gave him a senzu bean to revive him again. He let Piccolo become even stronger so that he would have to train and get stronger as well. Then, when Kami sama offered Goku his place, Goku ditched it, because it wouldn't be any fun. 

Wow, ain't that a lesson =D .. I couldn't realize that so well before. The closest hint that described this point was simply a Chinese drawing in a book that I had read many years ago. On the illustration, there was a bull and a man sitting under a tree, meditating. Under the drawing, something similar to the following was written: ".. So, he had been trying to tame the bull for weeks without success. One day he realized the meaning of bull, became enlightened and let it loose." After years of thinking about it, I thought I had understood it, but it seems that I hadn't. Well, I still don't think I have understood it completely yet, but thanks to Naruto and Dragon ball, I've become to understand more of this.

Thursday, November 18, 2010

Kundalini

While reading owltwelve's post on hi-speed wind in his area yesterday, I noticed that wind was also rising here. Before going to sleep, I just glared outside the balcony and played around with the wind and snowfall.

After that I meditated on my chakras again. The following doesn't coincide with the chakra drawings I have seen so far (which might mean that I'm either a freak =D or I misinterpreted what I saw). 

I found a chakra that I had missed in previous mediation sessions. It was between the throat and heart chakras - its shape seemed to have been something spherical. It could've been actually the throat chakra and perhaps I had simply missed its exact position. Pingala channel hurt and that "new" chakra also hurt. There seemed to be 2 channels that went behind the ears from the throat chakra - these also hurt. From the throat chakra, 2 more channels seemed to be going out - these were okay. Before seeing the branches, I saw the root of that chakra / channel, which looked pretty much like the root of a tree. With all those channels and that root it was sitting on the "new" chakra, the throat chakra reminded me of a tree. I visualized making the "new" chakra and throat chakra wider. Anyway, I was able to open the throat chakra by visualizing it growing wider.

Yesterday I watched the episode of "Dragon Ball", where Goku drank the real super-strength-potion and decided that I would also do one of those Kundalini awakening exercises. When previously I was a bit afraid of the power of Kundalini, then yesterday night I felt confident that at my current energy manipulation skills, I could handle it. So, I did the pranayama exercise again and ended it up with a short Kundalini awakening exercise. Slept incredibly well and felt really good while sleeping.

Today morning I woke up early .. to watch more "Dragon Ball" ( I'm addicted =/ ). After watching a couple of episodes, I felt like stretching a bit. Well, I stretched and stood up and as I did that, I nearly fell over - there was a sudden and really strong rush of energy into the head.

There was so much slush on the streets that I could barely focus on the clouds above. Moreover, there was a fog of moist air below any clouds, which made it difficult to observe any change in the clouds as a result of practice.

At school, it was somewhat difficult to pay attention in the first lecture, because I started to feel bad when I didn't focus on keeping my channels open. Whenever I changed my posture while sitting, I had another energy rush. After the first lecture, I think it became a bit more automatic and I was able to pay attention, but the rushes of heat still made me sweaty. Otherwise it feels like almost constantly being in pk mind-state.

Wednesday, November 17, 2010

Chakra ambient

Yesterday night, it was incredibly quiet. It was so quiet that while meditating for a few minutes, I could hear my chakras emitting noise (each at different frequencies). I haven't really noticed it before, but this time I could clearly hear it. Lower chakras seemed to have lower frequencies and chakras that located close to each other seemed to have a smaller difference in their frequencies (more difficult to tell them apart by sound).

I wonder what would happen if one compiled an audio file with the frequencies of all chakras and listen to it with their whole body (some big speakers).

I can't swing traffic lights like owltwelve does for everyday practice, because all traffic lights have rigid connections here. So, I have been searching for other ways to practice regularly:
  • Every time I open or close a door, I attempt stasis field on it to make its movement smooth and avoid banging.
  • When I visit the bathroom, I try to spin the roll of toiletpaper.
  • While walking to school or back home, I attempt to make holes in the clouds (when there are any). And when there are no clouds, I figured I should attempt to make some appear.
  • If there are fluorescent tubes blinking at school, I try to stop the blinking (by either having them glowing or not glowing constantly).
Actually, there are many more of what came into mind, but at the moment, these are the only ones I have had success with in the last few days.

Monday, November 15, 2010

Max Planck

Owltwelve had set another video as favorite. It was a compilation of well-put sentences from multiple films and videos (some of which I had seen earlier). What caught my attention though, was a quote from Max Planck. I googled up some of his quotes and found this page: http://en.wikiquote.org/wiki/Max_Planck. A couple of quotes to express my amazement:

As a man who has devoted his whole life to the most clear headed science, to the study of matter, I can tell you as a result of my research about atoms this much: There is no matter as such. All matter originates and exists only by virtue of a force which brings the particle of an atom to vibration and holds this most minute solar system of the atom together. We must assume behind this force the existence of a conscious and intelligent mind. This mind is the matrix of all matter.
I regard consciousness as fundamental. I regard matter as derivative from consciousness. We cannot get behind consciousness. Everything that we talk about, everything that we regard as existing, postulates consciousness. 
Science cannot solve the ultimate mystery of nature. And that is because, in the last analysis, we ourselves are part of nature and therefore part of the mystery that we are trying to solve.

In some of these quotes, I can recognize spontaneous ideas that have popped into my mind at random moments. A lot of them express my perspective on things amazingly well. I'm simply amazed..

Sunday, November 14, 2010

Sunset calling

Yesterday night I tried some yoga exercises that either owltwelve had posted in the forums (this one) or I had googled while reading the yoga book that he had posted (this book).

Took yesterdays program and upgraded it a little. I noticed that programming brought me into the pk mind-state - I started to feel the laptop and objects surrounding me. If I could always be in the same state, no matter what I were doing, then that would be fun - it would all be like a big meditation and pk practice.

While reading instructions for an upcoming practical, I visualized the weather outside changing. Visualized a beautiful sunset emerging from an otherwise cloudy sky. I noticed a slight change in the light that was reflected off the wallpaper and walked up to the balcony door to check the weather. A nice sunset had emerged indeed and I realized that I could control the brightness of it to some degree. Anyway, I went back to continue reading and a few seconds later, the sunset got covered in clouds again.

Saturday, November 13, 2010

ESP aid

Took a few hours and wrote a simple program for practicing ESP, clairvoyance or remote viewing today. It queries Google Image search for random numbers, takes a random image and downloads it. There are still a few problems though:
  • It only downloads small thumbnails of the pictures
  • QT doesn't display .gif files and fails with wikipedia .svg.png files as well
  • For some unknown reason, most pictures are car pictures =/
So far I haven't had much success with attempts on it though. Practiced some stasis on a large toy windmill and tried again when I felt overwhelmed by that. At first I was like "Nah, wrong again.." but then I changed my attitude so that it would be more fun. When I did, I guessed the texture that was on one picture, color on another and just when I was about to give up for today, I guessed the shape on the third one - the shape was exactly like on the picture. The color of the shape also looked like it had popped into my mind. Cool..

During these attempts, I occasionally saw rooms and places in the darkness of closed eyes. Everything was dark and I could only see some room edges. I could sense the surroundings better by feeling walls, trees or whatever was around me. I felt my presence in these places and I felt the response / echo of the presence from the walls so that I could almost tell how far the walls were about 360 degrees around me. Something similar often happens during meditation or before falling asleep.

Tried to spin one of those big windmill toys with an open balcony door again and was able to twitch it more than yesterday. I once even managed to turn it 360 degrees and when I stroke it with a finger, then I managed to speed it up when it was starting to slow down. Managed to help it make about 3 turns like this. Perhaps wind was also slightly stronger, but it certainly wasn't enough for a full turn - I would've felt that wind. A slight gust of wind did come later when I was about to stop practicing.

Here's how I attempted stasis on the big toy windmill today: 

I set the windmill right in front of the fan so that propeller was exactly behind the windmill. The toy windmill is so large that it blocks almost all the wind coming from the fan. I attempted stasis on the toy windmill, while trying to "transfer" the rotation to the propeller (aka stop the windmill and make the propeller spin). I think it should be an easier way to get all kind of objects spinning, since there's an example of something spinning right next to the object one would want spinning. It was the first time I attempted stasis on such a big toy windmill and almost the first time with moving the propeller without using a fan for it. Although I could visibly slow down the windmill, I only managed to turn the propeller less than 90 degrees once. For most of the time, it just wiggled up and down a little.

Friday, November 12, 2010

Writing scientific articles

The first lecture today morning was on preparing scientific articles (prof. Peeter Saari again - the one, who also gave Quantum Mechanics, Electricity and Magnetism). It addressed most of the problems that I had read about throat chakra blockages yesterday. Most of the lecture goes for pk as well as writing articles.

Some points from the lecture, slightly modified for pk:

Tune in
  • Who am I? (psion-wannabe, psion, master, superhero - always position yourself one step higher than who you think you are)
  • Why am I doing this? (to figure out how the universe works, for enlightenment, for saving people, for proving skeptics wrong...)
  • How can I make myself enjoy the process? (devise fun experiments for pk practice, make up new skills to improve on)
Overcome the potential barrier of hard work and get started
  • Start from the best point (practice the most fun skills and take the most fun experiment set up for that)
  • Write the introduction last (you don't have to start from the basics and then get to more advanced stuff - you'll get the basics while practicing the more advanced and more fun stuff anyway)
  • Don't postpone it - hit the iron while it's still warm (always continue practicing and do at least something even when you don't have the time; tuning in is costly)
  • Logics must not limp (when you have decided to go at it with proper belief and without doubt, make sure to keep it like that)
Use the power of technology (pk practice can be made more fun with the help of technology)

Decided to take another recording attempt on the radiometer (this time at slower speed). Well, I hadn't practiced on it for quite a while and couldn't stop it at slower speed. However, practicing pk with a camera rolling is good for overcoming stage fever anyway.

Attempted to spin one of the big toy windmills I bought recently. I think I got it to twitch barely, but nothing remarkable. Opened the balcony door and positioned it in front of the balcony hoping that for enough wind from the outside to make it wiggle or something. Well, it didn't even budge with such a small air draft. Took another attempt on spinning it with pk and it twitched noticeably. I gave it a spin with my finger and attempted to spin it with pk again - it twitched even more. Practiced on it like this until my hands and feet got cold. I got it to twitch by about 1 cm along its outer circle.

Also attempted pk on my room door in a similar way, but didn't see much effect. 

Thursday, November 11, 2010

QMech exam

Quantum mechanics exam didn't go too well. Well, I don't have anything to lose if I fail it, nor do I have anything to lose when I pass it. Either way, I have to study it more, because even when I pass, I would have to take an oral exam to rise the grade.

Edit: The total maximum number of points that was awarded on this exam was 68 of 100. I got 51 points (barely passed it). It was funny, how quickly I was able to react - professor had just uploaded the page and hadn't even managed to write an e-mail yet. I just suddenly got the feeling that it's up while studying for spectroscopy.

Anyway, it's finally a free weekend in the span of about 3 weeks and I can practice some pk (and do homework). 

Attempted pk on that wooden stick and my throat started to hurt when I put effort into trying to move it. So, I guess I'm stuck at the throat chakra now and need to solve the problems that block it.

Googled on throat chakra and found other symptoms of a slight blockage there as well. I have occasionally found it difficult to express myself in correct terminology. So far I have also had difficulties leading people - I'm too soft and often unable to motivate them (I'm too used to doing everything myself).

Meditated on the chakra before going to sleep. I started feeling a lot better. 

Wednesday, November 10, 2010

Dragon Ball

Although quantum mechanics exam is tomorrow, I watched quite a lot of Dragon Ball episodes today. All the episodes I watched today were the most interesting and inspiring episodes of Dragon Ball I have seen so far (50+ something to 61). Interesting pk in the Penguin village (a small kid fixing and building electronics with intent, sensing and analyzing pk around him and downloading new information with his mind). Then a bulletproof Indian and that assassin Tao Pai Pai, who redirected a sniper bullet with his slipper in a very cool way. Also, it was inspiring to see how the cat hermit trains people - that strength potion probably won't do much, but it serves as a great dummy goal to make one strong while they're trying to reach that potion.

Edit: Yup, the potion was tap water =D.

Nothing worth mentioning on pk today though - a rather regular day with only small occasional pk attempts.

Monday, November 8, 2010

QMech hangover

Had a slight headache today, but it seemed like it was a hangover from studying quantum mechanics.

I feel a bit down for not having had the chance to seriously practice pk for about 3 weeks or even more. Reading pk success stories of other guys from the forum make me want to practice it more, but my days are stuffed with homework, preparations for the exam and work for my thesis. Need to meditate and make myself more joyful again.

Anyway, I'm happy that in addition to integrating over wavefunctions in the dreams, I also saw a cool dream. I was helping people with remote viewing. Some guys started chasing me because I was freeing people they had kidnapped. We were hitting fences with a girl I was helping and at some point I realized that gravity was only an illusion and flew to rescue someone. Since I had not watched any "Green Lantern" videos yet, I think it could have been "The men who stare at goats" that I watched Saturday evening after a day of quantum mech.

Yesterday evening, after watching a video on the Bindu point that owltwelve had posted on the forums a while ago, I meditated on moving psi through the point. Found that it was the same point that had occasionally hurt after the grounding exercise I sometimes performed. It was the point, through which the psi flow left the head and turned into a fountain. Perhaps it wasn't the studying that made my head hurt, but the Bindu instead .. don't know.

Sunday, November 7, 2010

Remote controlled bugs

Almost the whole weekend of study group in quantum mechanics - getting ready for the exam on Thursday. It's the first subject over the 3 years for which we have organized anything similar. My personal opinion is that it's somewhat overkill, but I guess I would need it for the book anyway (decided to start writing a book for introducing psionics to physicists one day).

I would have had time to also practice pk before going to bed yesterday, but I was rather tired and meditated instead. It felt really good, but furniture started snapping all over the apartment again and being startled, I stopped meditating. When I did, I realized that I shouldn't have - it's like my old habit of waking up from a nightmare; one is supposed to face it and solve the problem instead of always fleeing from it.

Sister bought a couple of remote controlled bugs as Christmas presents for 2 young cousins. She got them cheap and we were checking them with father. Due to a lot of faults, I was rather skeptical about it. 

After charging, one of them worked well (the one with almost no visible faults - only a dent in the antenna), although frequently acted on its own (flying around on the floor without pressing a button). There was probably a lot of noise on 40 and 27 MHz. Also, the manufacturer had shipped a random antenna that was not a multiple of a quarter of wavelength - which causes a lot of interference.

The other didn't even flap its wings (had been left switched on for some reason and its back wing was slightly bent under the weight of the remote controller). We had decided to take it back to the store, but then tried it again. Still only the yaw motor was working. I looked at it with compassion and thought that it would be great if it worked. The wings suddenly twitched on their own and after that, it was working amazingly well.

I don't know what was wrong, but it reminded me of my Robotex robots that worked well before the competition and went on strikes when start had been fired.

Saturday, November 6, 2010

Discussion with sister

Discussed all kind of weird matters with my sister yesterday night, as I had visited the gym again and felt too active to go to sleep before 3 AM. While listening to her stories, I practiced pk on a chair in front of me at the same time. I didn't succeed in moving it enough to actually see it moving or cause any sound.

She described her after death experience and how she chose this family - one of the most mind-blowing stories I have heard on this subject. I hope she's going to upload descriptions of her experiences soon.

It turned out that this creepy face that used to stare at her in her dreams (I remember mentioning it somewhere before) was an entity that needed help. During meditation, she saw the aura of this entity and decided to help them. After solving the problem, it all disappeared.

The discussion reminded me that I have had a few telepathic and precognition experiences lately. I guess it was on Thursday that father and I were going shopping and I went to ask my sister if she wanted anything special. The moment I opened her door, a vivid picture of dark chocolate popped into my mind. I could've guessed it with regular logics as well, but it was the first time I have received such a clear picture of what she wanted.

Friday morning in a lecture, the editor of an Estonian popular science magazine explained how to write magazine articles. He showed a slide, where there were several popular science books. When the middle book cover appeared, I noticed a feeling of something interesting happening soon. The last book cover appeared and I got the feeling (I knew it) that Erik rises his hand because he has read it. The editor said: "This last one is perhaps the most popular of these. Raise hands, who has read it." Erik's hand was rising.. =D

Friday, November 5, 2010

Alien dream

For change, I tried the grounding exercise again yesterday night. Rose psi flow intensity to a moderate level, which resulted in sharp pain strikes in the right hemisphere today morning. It's the same area in the right hemisphere that always hurts after doing some more intense pk.

Couldn't listen to almost anything the lecturer was saying - it was too painful. Out of instinct, I visualized welding a big block of iron to cover an opening. During the visualization, the pain strikes got so frequent that I almost became numb to it. When finished, pain was no longer as frequent as before. However, I'm slightly worried about this blunt approach to healing this and its possible side-effects.

I think I should start practicing pk, while concentrating on the right hemisphere or something to improve its endurance to more intense psi flows.

While coming home from school again, I walked past those 3 flags again. It was still quite windy, but it wasn't as strong as during the last couple of days. Attempted stasis by visualizing a dense construct with high viscosity on the "first" flag and it was a success. It looked like during the attempt the flag got sticky and wrapped into a tight cylinder that started descending - became too heavy for the wind to lift. Other flags kept flapping in the wind. This time I was already in a pk state of mind before approaching the flags and the target flag seemed quite responsive. It simply took a thought to bring the flag up and flapping again.

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Saw a cool dream today morning. I was doing something with the laptop in the dream and having finished, looked around. In the corner, where I had set up props for passive pk, I noticed that light refracted (through the balcony door glass) or reflected (from outdoors) onto the wall in such a way that it formed crop circles of light. It looked rather boring (reminded me of "sacred geometry," which I have pretty much ignored so far), but it being a crop circle of light and all, I wanted to take a picture of it. Went to ask mother (I was somewhat surprised that she was home) for a better camera.

Came back with the camera, but as I had thought, sun had already moved so that the crop circles were gone and the only thing I could see on the walls were projections of curtain flowers. I thought "Oh, well" and started to look around, wondering if it's a dream or not (it looked and felt pretty real, but had quite a few glitches). When I did, some new stuff suddenly appeared - a drawing of an alien with Aztec or Mayan writings appeared on the ceiling (looked like a kid's drawing in blue ink). Similar drawings of UFO-s and their construction appeared on the bed (these were in color). Also, a booklet with some pretty detailed schematics appeared on the chair.

Although it was interesting and kept me distracted for a few seconds, I was still wondering why there were such drawings scattered around the room when it wasn't even my drawing style nor my handwriting. Furthermore, I couldn't remember having done or even seen any of this before. When I thought that, new stuff appeared again. This time I saw a spoon floating in the air below the ceiling. Looked at it, said "Wow" and picked it up. Threw it up in the air to see if it would start floating again - nope, it dropped onto the bed. I saw more objects hanging in mid-air the same way. Although I had started to wonder why I couldn't remember having set any of this up, it took me some more seconds and then the alarm rang. 

Thinking back on what SeriousKnot posted in the forums yesterday, there really might be a group designing dreams in order to keep us from becoming lucid. I can't think of a good enough reason for my subconscious mind to put so much effort into keeping my mind busy so that it wouldn't become lucid. Usually when I become lucid, I wake up before I manage to do much anyway. Well, who knows - I guess this would need some more research.

Thursday, November 4, 2010

Cloud stasis

Saw a weird dream in the morning. I woke up in the dream, checked my blog and I was blown - it had become really popular overnight. There were thousands of people reading it and I knew only a few of them. That has never been my goal with this blog - it's supposed to be a place from where I can search for and analyze my previous experiences, while being able to provide links to them.

Couldn't feel the surroundings so well today. It was windy today, but I didn't manage to feel the wind very well. It was also raining slightly, but I couldn't make any rainshields either (usually I get at least a drop in the probability of getting hit by raindrops, but this time I couldn't even visualize a rainshield).

Clouds were moving fast and when I saw a hole forming in the clouds during a lecture, I started playing around with the clouds. I took a bigger cloud and slowed it down with stasis, allowing for the hole to last longer. When previously the clouds seemed to have been moving at roughly the same speed, then during the stasis field attempt and after that, other clouds moved past the big one. I checked back on it later and all clouds had slowed down along with the wind outside. At first it seemed like the big cloud was completely motionless, but a moment later I could see that it was moving really slowly. Looked as if it was slowly accelerating after the attempt, because a few minutes later it moved at almost the same speed as the other clouds again.

While coming home, I attempted stasis on the 3 flags in front of the construction supply store again. Well, there might have been a small effect in the flapping speed slowing down and flags lowering slightly, but nothing spectacular.

I have set up a few more objects besides the radiometer to practice passive pk on. There is one big toy windmill for spinning and a small stick of wood for push / pull. All of them are visible from the corners of my eyes while sitting at the desk, studying or using the laptop. Hoping for more reliable results that I can tape some day.

Wednesday, November 3, 2010

Feel the surroundings

On first glance, Alan Watts looked familiar, just like an old friend. There have been quite a few such people, who look like old friends when we first meet. After watching one more of his videos, searching for his life from wikipedia and then walking into the kitchen, I felt like Alan Watts in a new body. Similarly, after watching Serial Experiments Lain a while ago, I felt like Lain for a couple of weeks afterwards.

When walking to school yesterday morning and today morning, I could feel the height of the buildings and trees that I passed by. I could feel the ground beneath me to about 10 meters or more in depth. When I looked at the river, I felt the water so well that I became uneasy about looking at it from a bridge. Location of incoming cars, bicycles and people worked without forming a shield, as I had realized that we can already feel the surroundings by default (we usually just ignore it). My empathy and telepathy seem to have improved thanks to this.

I figured that I should do the grounding exercise again, but fell asleep during meditation. Slept for a couple of hours during the day.

Recently, while listening to music, I have noticed that it sometimes bends and pitches weird (slows down and frequencies lower), like I was performing unconscious pk on the sound. Edit: Luckily, the sound files have stayed untouched.

Another nice video clip on enlightenment, featuring Alan Watts - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H1LzVN8nqg0. "..and when you're like everybody's dream of a sultan in a palace, you suddenly notice there's a button named "surprise". You push that, and here we are.." XD.

Monday, November 1, 2010

Auric sight

Meditated before going to sleep yesterday, which gave me a powerful feeling even though I couldn't move much psi around.

While walking to school in the morning, I noticed that some people passing by were looking above my head with amazement. I thought it was something similar to what owltwelve was talking about. However, the people staring at me were not children - one was about 20 and the others were about 40 or 50. Wondering what they might have seen, I visualized myself from the eyes of one of them and saw a slightly expanded golden bud (could've been just my imagination though).

This 4 hour lecture that had been skipped twice now finally took place. It was one of the most boring lecture I've been to, so I just stared at the lecturer for some time. I started seeing a transparent haze around him (I think it's aura because of how I saw it radiating from my knee at Voore). I noticed that every time I looked at him, I saw bright vertical lines and some bright dots floating around next to him (in addition to the haze that he was surrounded by). There was also a line or something on his neck that had more contrast than the rest of his skin.

Then, I experienced an ego slap and felt down and slightly depressed for seemingly no reason. =/ I could barely see any aura and could no longer feel psi very well. Need to boost my motivation again.

Drank kefir and ate nuts with dried fruits. When I did, I started to feel the surroundings again. So, perhaps it was a lack of some nutrients or something instead? 

Stumbled upon a nice Alan Watt's monologue on fear of enlightenment: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WUXodFgbDfQ

Edit:

Before falling asleep, I intended on experiencing unity. I remember that it was amazing, but a bit overwhelming. Had almost forgotten it in the morning though, and intended on experiencing unity again. This time I was eating muesli when I started to feel the surroundings again - so, it's not nutrients, it's a mind-block. The experience was more intense than I can remember having before - I saw myself in all the objects on the kitchen table. Being indoors and feeling things that I couldn't see from outside the building was overwhelming at first.

While walking around in the apartment, I noticed that I could feel everything a lot better than I used to. I could swing hanging clothes with almost no effort. I went outside, intending on experiencing unity with other people as well. I remembered that I had blocked myself from feeling other people out of fear that I would unconsciously manipulate with them. However, it no longer makes sense to block a part of me from myself.