Welcome

The goal of this blog is to motivate myself and others for further practice as well as provide details that might explain what's going on..


Thursday, September 30, 2010

Accuracy upgrade

Yippee, quantum mechanics test is now over.

Yesterday evening, when I went to bed and closed my eyes, I noticed that I could still see my room. I could see the carpet clearly enough to distinguish its pattern. I could see the shelves with books and cupboard. Thinking that my eyes must still be somewhat open so that light penetrates through the eyelids, I opened my eyes. With my eyes open, I couldn't see the carpet at all, because the edge of the bed blocked my view. I must have been seeing with at least my 3rd eye area or whole forehead to achieve such a viewing angle.

A few days ago while attempting stasis field on the radiometer, I felt that the pk mind-state I have usually been using was not pure. I could feel it being composed of 2 bigger components whereas one of them seemed to be an unhealthy component. In other words, I had become more accurate in entangling my mind to objects.

Right after the quantum mechanics test, I noticed that my previous definition of myself being calm had also lost its meaning, because I could now feel the feeling of calmness and peace better and separate it from other feelings. I started amplifying the feeling of this new and more pure calmness. While doing this, I started feeling almost a third of the whole wing of the school building. When I looked outside the window, I almost felt like having an OBE into the trees and other buildings down there. The only problem was that I quickly became really hungry while practicing this during a lecture. I kept focused on the feeling for almost 2 lectures.

At the beginning of the second lecture, I had to go to the bathroom. When I came back and started copying stuff from the blackboard, I felt the lecturer having a great intent of asking me about the drawings on the blackboard (which one was supposed to be the right one and why). Well, I had missed the part of the lecture where he had defined the symbols. I knew that the left one was correct, but I didn't know why. And that's what he intended to ask me. I tried to build a quick shield around me - his voice staggered for a moment, but the intent was back soon enough (and he still asked me).

Wow, owltwelve (TheMoonKingdom) blows my mind again:  
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-6eSXdODbOM (wind manipulation and stasis field)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h-4uMSewaz4 (pyrokinesis on multiple candles)

Wednesday, September 29, 2010

Sleeping 11h straight

Went straight to bed after coming home yesterday.

I was slightly frustrated about finding out that processor ESD diodes may act as thyristors and randomly latch up. I was frustrated because I didn't know what to do - LM3S9B92 just hopped to about 83 degrees Celsius (whereas 85 degrees is the absolute maximum of its operating range). On the other hand, I was happy too, because it would've been a bummer to learn it from mistake later.

Anyway, I went straight to bed after eating something. Although I was exhausted, I didn't get any dreams at first and was just lying on my back with almost no thoughts. Some minutes later I noticed that my hands and legs were out of the body. I didn't get to a full OBE although the feelings seemed similar enough as if I've been having them pretty often (some dreams, perhaps?).

Monday, September 27, 2010

Speed-learning thru pk

I'm still quite tired from the weekend. Having a hard time concentrating on quantum mechanics worksheets, I turned the halogen lamp on. This way I could occasionally practice stasis field on the radiometer, when losing focus on learning. I really like it this way - I can do whatever I have to and while doing it, I can still practice pk, as the radiometer is always in the view.

While looking at the radiometer vanes and then back at the paper or worksheet on laptop screen, I often felt this shift-of-focus feeling (which is brain adjusting to the resonant frequency of the spinning vanes). After a couple of minutes glaring at the radiometer, I usually found it easier to continue studying again (it kind of brought me out of the dreamy state that a tired mind keeps falling into).

Sunday, September 26, 2010

Weather on our side

Right when Tähe Family Days ended, the sky poofed full of clouds and it immediately got colder by 5 degrees Celsius. I remembered that the organizer said two weeks ago: "The weather is already ordered, don't worry about that." I remember thinking that it would be really cool if his prophecy would come true (because it usually hadn't, considering a few previous years). Well, the results were amazing, as right when the festival started, the sky went clear, weather nice and warm and immediately when it ended, it was back to normal autumn weather.

Found a better position for the radiometer. It now sits about 10 cm below the halogen lamp. Got it spinning faster and although I could slightly slow it down, I could no longer stop it today.

Saturday, September 25, 2010

Lots of fun

Lots of fun stuff. Yesterday night we had a performance in Rakvere that at first seemed to have been destined for failure. We had forgotten most of our stuff at Tartu and the crowd was getting pessimistic already, but it all ended so that even we were really amazed at the show. Today was the first day of Tähe Family Days, which is more or less a science festival with all kinds of performances consisting of the most fun physics, chemistry, material science experiments.

Shooting bottle rockets filled with liquid nitrogen, shooting ping-pong balls with a vacuum cannon, blowing stuff up, shooting smoke rings over 10 meters tall building, playing around with Tesla generators, Van de Graaf generators and a lot more. Anyway, I saw exactly the same radiometer there (the same model that I had ordered). One of the instructors at the desk asked if I knew what it was and I replied: "Sure, I even ordered one home, but it hasn't arrived yet." She said: "Well, I'm sure it will arrive soon." An hour later I received an SMS that my package had arrived. Yay!

Physics theatre guys asked me to bring them our smoke machine at 15 PM. I totally forgot about it, because there was always so much to do. Then suddenly, when I was completely concentrated on what I was showing to the kids, it popped into my mind, piercing through all other thoughts I had in mind. I checked the clock - 15.01 PM. Quite accurate timing.

Father arrived at the scene when we had almost finished packing up the festival gear. We took the radiometer home. I put it on a shelf, just under the halogen lamp I considered most powerful. It started spinning slowly. I looked at the vines more closely and it stopped. Later I showed it to my sister as well and this time actually tried to stop it. It stopped again.

Today I noticed a few weird movements around me. The empty radiometer box seemed to have twitched slightly on its own. A moment after using the sink in the kitchen, a scoop or something suddenly moved so that I could hear it and see it in the corner of my eyes.

I remembered that yesterday I could feel areas with warmer air around me. Some of these areas or clouds or whatever they should be called were coming from inside me. Some of them came from nearby objects like an outdoor candle, an STM NE555N timer chip burning on a rocket delay detonator circuit.

For quite some years I'm amazed at how seldom I fall ill or get injured. A couple of years ago I used to be ill almost exactly twice per year (in January and in June). During the last couple of years though, I haven't been ill even once even though I have caught cold pretty often. I have never broken any bones, never had any surgeries, never had to take any pills and so on. I'm really happy about that, as it definitely makes achieving my goals a lot easier. The only times I have actually injured myself or fallen ill have all been when I have had insufficient sleep. Now that I think about it, I guess I have healed the worst diseases I've gathered before the need to go to a doctor.

One more thing that I thought I should post. Yesterday morning while walking to school, after having decided to practice levitation the previous night, I started feeling myself lighter. Even if just a little, I found walking and carrying laptop bag a lot less exhaustive than usual.

Friday, September 24, 2010

Scattered posts

Attempted to illuminate the phosphor-luminescent toy yesterday evening again. This time I tried a technique that came to my mind a couple of days ago, but I had been trying to leave it for the last (for comparison). I visualized UV light being emitted from my palms, which would excite the atoms in the toy.

I don't know if it was the method or something else, but the glow seemed more intensive than yesterday (although it was still faint). It seemed to have started glowing a lot earlier than yesterday as well.

Having stopped before a traffic light, I looked at a traffic light post and felt it slowly swimming around in the asphalt as if it were liquid. During some previous schooldays I have felt chalk figures slightly morphing and moving around on the blackboard. I find it weird, because it feels like pk, but I think that so far none of it has produced results that others could see - probably too slow movement for that. When I have filmed moving something with the same feeling, some slight movement has usually been caught on the recording (especially when watching it at high speeds).

When I was looking through one of quantum mechanics problem solutions at school, I gradually lost focus of the paper and started feeling the table underneath. Amazingly, the feeling of the table was better than what I have accomplished during the last few weeks. It was still not strong enough to actually move the table around though.

Almost all of todays lectures were in the same room again. After one of these lectures ended and students had left, the door and windows were left open. As a result, the door kept swinging forward and backward, making a squeaky noise. I was eating lunch and took a quick look at the door, attempting to close it with pk. Then I just continued eating and shortly afterwards the door took a bigger swing towards closing and got stuck in the door frame. Erik who had also stayed in the classroom, asked: "You just used your psi powers, right?" I was amazed at both of us and started laughing.

It's quite unusual, I thought and started searching for all kinds of excuses of how it couldn't have been me. At first I thought he did it, because I didn't feel the door and didn't actually pay attention to it after the first look at it. Also, how did he know what I was thinking - I thought he wasn't into psionics. Anyway, I wanted to tell him about the Igor experiment, but other students came in. I then thought I could chat with him in the evening, so it didn't matter.

As a matter of fact, the evening got stretched and I arrived at home at around 10:40 PM. I had forgotten about what I had wanted to say to Erik. When I turned my laptop on and opened messenger, Erik immediately asked me if I had been bowling with the other classmates. Now, the bowling had been scheduled for the next Friday, but it reminded me what I had intended to tell him. A short, but interesting discussion on probabilities and quantum mechanics grew out.

One more thing I remembered about the schoolday. Someone presented a 1 hour summary of their PhD on symbiotic star research in astrophysics seminar. I was looking at her aura, which I could occasionally see from the corner of my eyes. Once when she moved forward, I saw her moving forward before her body followed. I don't think that the ghost image that moved before her physical body was related to auras, because it was darker and had her look imprinted on it.

Tuesday, September 21, 2010

Yet another rainshield attempt

When I left school, it was raining slightly. I decided not to put my jacket on and walk home with just a jersey on so that I could practice shielding against the rain. At about halfway home, I realized that I was still dry and started getting more wet afterwards. There were a few more of those realization moments after which I started getting wet more quickly. When I avoided thinking about it, I was barely hit with any raindrops. Some 5 minutes (of the total 30-35 minutes) before arriving at home, I put my jacket on. I checked the jersey and found it almost dry.

Bah, I'll do the rest of the homework tomorrow (the deadline for 12 quantum mechanics problems with solutions is on Thursday morning). =P Can't wait for some meditation and pk practice..

Tried to illuminate the phosphorus toy before going to sleep again. This time I tried different kind of constructs on it:
  • A simple psi-ball with nothing programmed
  • A hi-freq vibrating psi-ball
  • Psi-ball with magnetic push programmed
  • Lightning psi-ball (didn't have much time to experiment with this)
None of these seemed to have a outstanding effects. Probably all of them slightly contributed to the results. I _think_ I got it to glow slightly. I held the toy in my palms to avoid any external light exciting its atoms (there is some coming in from the balcony even with all the lights turned off). There seemed to have been a slight difference in how it looked in my palms when I first took it from the drawer and when I had finished practicing. In any case, the glow was pretty faint to draw any conclusions.

Monday, September 20, 2010

An application for levitation

Busy times and haven't had much pk practice lately although my whole body itches for it.

Before reaching home today, I was stopped by an old lady. She said that her door had closed when she had gone outside for a moment. A girl brought a ladder (even though she lives on the first floor, it's about 2.5 to 3 meters to the railing), I climbed up the balcony and opened the door from the inside. She was in a hurry, as there was some kind of a soup boiling on the cooker. It was interesting that it was the same apartment I had been looking at each morning. I used to wonder who lived there before..

Now if something similar were to happen to someone living on the 3rd, 4th or even 9th floor, the only solutions would be either to levitate up there or call some kind of a special service with metal saws to cut through the door or with fire department ladders. The latter one would probably take so much time that there wouldn't be much left of the soup and / or kitchen (in the case of a gas cooker). That's a good enough reason learning levitation.

Saturday, September 18, 2010

Airshow

I thought I had the weekend for doing homework and practicing pk, but it seems it has turned out different. Kevin and Caspar came and we went to the airshow that was going on at the local aircrafts museum. We will be going there again tomorrow and hopefully get to enjoy a free flight over the town.

Edit: The flight was canceled due to stormy weather.

I'm happy that I had decided to go to the show. I saw cool planes and had the chance to feel a couple of helicopters take off. The weather was kind of off and we ended up having a lot of convenient coincidences - it started raining heavily when the show had ended. And it only rained when we were under some kind of a roof or in the car or something.

We came to my place afterwards and took some stasis-field attempts on the propeller with Kevin. Then Taavi invited us to go stargazing somewhere out of town. I made a joke about how we should start practicing turning off street lamps to keep them from lighting the surroundings too much. Ironically, some 10 meters ahead, there were 2-3 street lamps off. I don't know who did it, because I didn't even have much intent for actually doing something like that. It was the same for Kevin, but Caspar confessed of an attempt to turn a few street lamps off. Weird enough, these street lamps happened to be exactly where Taavi had intended to take us to (a relatively remote park).

Actually, before Taavi called, we had been stargazing on our balcony and when I was focusing the telescope on Jupiter, the surroundings got darker - the nearest street lamp (the one I once practiced on) turned off and then another.

Friday, September 17, 2010

Hesitant lights

There was some weird stuff going on with the bathroom light in the morning. I flipped the light switch to wash my hands, but I ended up washing them in the dark. I came back later and tried to turn the lights on again. It took some 3-4 seconds of darkness when the light started flickering and then turned on. The next time I tried to turn it on, the light turned on exactly at the same moment that I opened the door. After that, the light switched almost immediately after flipping the switch.

I don't know what was going on, but I can't blame my father for doing these things this time =D..

It seems that I was too optimistic and the radiometer will actually arrive the next week. =P Got to think up some other ways for practicing until then.

Usually I have set myself a goal and then tried to achieve it with pk, but this time I just let it go. I let my mind do whatever it wanted with pk. It usually wants to just play around moving things randomly. I would then just sit back and watch or feel what it's doing. I'm starting to think that there might be more potential in approaching it this way. This way I can get the feeling of objects more easily and it all feels much more fun.

Yay, mindfreak season 6 has leaked to youtube. Watched the first episode to boost my motivation some more.

Thursday, September 16, 2010

Yellow sunlight

Yesterday I visited the gym again and pulled somewhat tougher training. Although I didn't sleep much yesterday night, I was really refreshed today morning.

I have sometimes gotten the feeling of sun shining on heavy clouded days. When I get that feeling, I start seeing myself in yellow sunlight. I kind of start seeing faint yellow light everywhere, almost as if sun were shining through the clouds (well, it always is, but usually the clouds only let bluish-gray light through). It always rises my mood and also seems to be rising the mood of others walking past me.

Today morning while walking to school, I noticed that the sky was clouded, but had quite a few holes in the clouds. I got the feeling of everything shining in the faint yellow light again and when I did, a hole appeared in the clouds so that I was walking in a small spot of sunlight for some seconds. The spot was not much bigger than my shadow, but it looked weird when I compared it with my surroundings - which were all in the shadows of the clouds.

Also during the schoolwalk, I noticed that I was breathing through my right nostril. I tried to switch it to the left one by simply visualizing / feeling it happening. It took me the whole walk (roughly 30 minutes) to finally get it going. I found out I had been doing it wrong - both nostrils are connected and I needed to visualize air going deeper into the left part of my respiratory system.

Meditated in front of the laptop while listening to music (a Clint Mansell's soundtrack instrumental for "The Fountain") and 6 minutes were already enough to reach the pk mindstate again. It's different sometimes - sometimes I get into deeper meditation states more easily when not listening to anything. 

While at school (a lecture on "optics and optoelectronical devices"), I got an idea to excite atoms in a small phosphor luminescent toy I have at home. Going to try and get it glowing before going to sleep. Forgot that I had left the toy on the shelf and that I would have to wait a couple of hours before it would stop glowing. So, I tried to make the ceiling lamp glow instead. It was getting late and I didn't have enough time to get it glowing yet.

Wednesday, September 15, 2010

Lots of sleeping

I was so tired yesterday that I was pecking in a lecture. Every time I woke up after seeing a few seconds of dreams, there were a few seconds, during which my mind worked at about twice the regular speed. I could grasp everything I saw on the slides and then fall asleep with the next eyeblink again. I tried hard not to fall asleep, but I simply couldn't.

I also noticed that I could feel different objects more easily than before. But I don't think it's related to not having slept enough, it's probably thanks to prior pk practice.

Took 2 hours for sleeping during the day. For some reason, I was tired, but I couldn't sleep very well during the day. Did some homework and went to sleep. Before going to sleep, I quickly checked the forums (or at least the topic that I had left open) and found an interesting challenge - stasis practice on hurricane Igor. I decided I would attempt to slow it down before falling asleep.

I quickly relaxed all of my muscles and tried to clear my mind beforehand. Then I tried to visualize the hurricane and while visualizing it, I tried to slow down its rotation speed. Well, I could slow the visualization down to a halt, but when I checked the trackers again today, it's still going. So, I guess I'm not very good at such remote pk yet. I remembered a guy in some psionics forums, who could heal people just by seeing their nicknames.

The practice affected my mind-state and I took another levitation attempt, but fell asleep before anything happened. I saw a lot of pk and levitation dreams thanks to this.

When I was about to wake up, I heard a woman walking down the street and to my surprise, I was not only hearing, but also seeing her walking.

Yesterday evening we took a look at Jupiter with the Galileoscope that I had ordered a few weeks ago. Since we didn't have any tripods, we saw a lot of hand vibration (already with the 25x zoom configuration - there's also a 50x configuration). It put me thinking that trying to keep hand vibrations down should be quite similar to meditation and pk as well. After all, I saw it on TV that there was a guy, who made sculptures out of sugar cubes without using a table or even a microscope. It also reminded me of Naruto's meditation on gathering Nature's energy, where the slightest thoughts would make him lose his balance.

Monday, September 13, 2010

Pk on doors

Remembered what I also wanted to write here while sleeping. I postponed the alarm 2 times and the last time it rang, I noticed something I hadn't noticed before. The dream I was seeing completely freezed and I couldn't understand what was going on (it looked exactly as if a program had crashed). We were doing something and then suddenly the others along with all the environment stopped moving. I could move around and look it from all kinds of angles, but it wasn't responding. I got to think about it for some dream seconds before the alarm actually rang.

Had to sit in the queue of medical committee for about 4 hours again. Because of all this waiting, I missed my "quantum mechanics" lecture =(. I used it to practice pk at first, but as I grew hungry and tired, I couldn't keep up with it for very long.

I attempted to move branch spots in the wood of the wall panels. Previously I have attempted to move a hole in the wall in my room - without any success though. Well, although it was to some extent even fun, it didn't have any large scale visible effects this time either.

They were still using that stone age running-with-papers technology for propagating analysis results. Thanks to that, they often left doors open and I could just stare at these doors, trying to either swing them wide open or to close them. When the door swung open too wide, they would pause their work and go close the door though =/.

I also spent quite a lot of time trying to get the feeling of opening one of the doors by pushing down the door handle and pulling via pk. The product of these two feelings didn't seem very simple though. I was more used to the feeling of simply pulling or pushing the door rather than pressing the handle down. While practicing this, it happened surprisingly often that someone would open the door from the inside right after I had started visualizing it opening.

Back at home I tried stasis on the propeller again. Interestingly, I had the most success (the propeller almost stopped at full speed for a few seconds) when I was about to pull the plug (and didn't). Another method that seemed to work incredibly well was putting a piece of paper next to the fan and concentrating on that piece of paper instead. This way I could see exactly how well I was concentrating on the paper or more accurately, how clear my mind was (of thoughts about trying to stop the propeller).

Attempted moving the tiny piece of paper again today. I balanced it on a corner of the shelf and positioned camera so that it would record the piece of paper. Again, the movement was so little that I thought it had all been AOL. However, there actually seemed to be movement on the recording. At first, the piece of paper twitched towards me (tried to pull it off the shelf). Then I left the room for a moment and I noticed that the piece of paper started twitching towards the wall (still towards me, even though I was in another room and not thinking about it). When I came back, my focus shifted to the table and it even showed up on the recording that the background shifted slightly in respect to the shelf corner.

Sunday, September 12, 2010

Small vs large objects

It popped into my mind again that there is a difference between pk on small objects versus pk on large objects. Judging by the feeling I'm having while doing pk, large objects can be manipulated with by using lower frequencies while smaller objects require higher frequency. The pk state of mind feels like the brain is in resonance with the object I'm feeling. So, the reason why I'm having difficulties twitching the psi-wheel or moving a tiny piece of paper could be that I've used lower frequencies too often and gotten used to it.

Cool, while taking a shower, I had to close my eyes so that I could wash my head. When I closed them, I could actually see my hands and the nozzle. Not as well as I used to before I found out that it wasn't my eyes I was seeing with. Anyway, I could see well enough to notice that I could see my hands even when they couldn't have been seen with regular eyes. I could even see them behind my head.

There was a fluorescent tube glowing in the kitchen and when I entered, I saw it flicker for a moment. Occasionally I also heard a few snapping sounds today.

I guess that yesterday's meditation session worked a treat - I'm back at feeling my surroundings again, though the feeling is still not as powerful as it was a few weeks ago. I should probably meditate some more on it. I did meditate some before going to bed, but it didn't have the same effect as yesterday.

I should've stretched my meditation session for longer, perhaps then I would have had some fun experiences. Had to go to bed even though I didn't feel like it at all. There was another medical committee for the compulsory military recruitment early in the next morning.

Binaural induced music

Been watching a lot of naruto with my father lately. It's rather rare that he has a weekend without any performances. So, a lot of practice time has gone there. On the other hand it's motivating just like watching mindfreak or reading posts on psionic community forums.

While listening to the few binaural beats owltwelve had posted, I started hearing beautiful music in the background of these rather monotonic beats. A few minutes later I also heard a sound that was similar to what I heard from one of these beats. The strange thing was that there actually was no music in the background and not even the noisy neighbors are listening to music this late. The same thing goes for the sound - it seemed to have come from the headphones, but there's nothing that could've caused it. I must have imagined / visualized the music and sound so that they actually seemed real to me.

I guess I'm going to meditate for quite some time today night, as I ate too much pork too late (too hungry). Going straight to bed could make me feel bad.

It only took a few minutes to get into the pk mindstate. I started building up on psi pressure and used it for visualizing the feeling of levitation. Shortly after I started feeling dizzy in the left hemisphere of my brain as well as in the heart area in the chest. Psi blockages again. So, I visualized opening hatchways near the blockages to let psi out instead of injuring myself. I don't know what kind of shields I have forgotten on again, but it seems that even the effect of the slightest thought lasts long enough to cause discomfort.

In addition to having psi blockages, I also noticed that some kind of a shield was crooked. My head was being pushed from the left and I guess that's why a blockage had formed there. That force was constantly pushing me out of body while I was stuck in other parts of my body.

This time I also tried to get the feeling I had while seeing with my eyes closed. I remember that the first things I saw the last time were my own body parts, so I tried to get it going by looking at myself with my eyes closed. Couldn't get very far with it yet.

I guess it's been a while since I had a meditation session this fun. It seemed like an hour of meditation, when it was actually only about 30 minutes.

Friday, September 10, 2010

Dad flickering lights

The last couple of days I haven't felt tired at all. Two days ago I was too tired to do anything and although I haven't slept much more than I had slept back then, I'm feeling more refreshed. Today I was really happy thanks to owltwelve's post in his journal. Also, yesterday I had a slight pain in my chest near the heart area. I tried to heal it yesterday evening and today morning, so that was also gone and I felt great. I had probably caught some cold and put too much effort into pk while not being relaxed.

While going to school, I tried to feel everything around me - wind, sunlight, ground, trees. I think I have practiced with all of them enough to be able to "connect" with them. I could feel something, but I still need to practice more to be able to bend light around me to cancel my shadow or to swirl wind around me.

Haven't attempted empathy on my walks to school and back for a while. On the other hand, I have gotten the feeling of most people being a bit depressed at the moment. It was a nice and warm summer, but now there's work/school and weather is rather cold also.

I've been getting a feeling of the abstractness of time lately. I have recently had a few flashback images from early childhood, feeling something like there's not much of a difference between those times or rather my existence is independent of time.

Guys were bored during the pause between 2 particle physics (not sure how it should be called in English) lectures, one of them made a paper plane and started experimenting with its aerodynamics. I got the idea to build one at home and try to change its direction during flight. It turned out to be rather difficult because the flight time is too short for me to be able to get the feeling of it. I either need to practice a lot more or pick up the feeling before tossing it into the air.

I bragged about owltwelve to my father and mentioned some of my own latest attempts as well. The last experience I mentioned was pk on the lights in the living-room and a street lamp. Right after that he flipped the switch in the kitchen and nothing happened. He was like: "What the heck?" and kept flipping it. A few seconds later the light started to flicker and finally turned on. I laughed: "Dunno, it wasn't me." He replied: "I wouldn't know, because these things usually happen randomly." Anyway, I know he did it.

Thursday, September 9, 2010

Wakeup from shutdown

Didn't have much visible success in the pk attempts yesterday evening. I meditated for about 10 minutes or so in the bed before falling asleep.

Somewhere around 3 AM I woke up, because my laptop had woken up from shutdown. It's a bit weird, but it has happened quite a few times already.

I read this post today from owltwelve's journal: http://psychokinesis.activeboard.com/forum.spark?aBID=117223&p=3&topicID=36322846&page=2. It gave me a really powerful feeling and motivated me greatly. Many thanks, man!

Wednesday, September 8, 2010

Photon dislocation

Yesterday was quite a busy day, so I didn't have much time for pk practice in the evening. I tried to pull a tiny piece of paper, but it barely budged. 

So, I went to bed and started visualizing another construct in the way of the clock projection. Previously I had been trying to move the projection, stretch it and change its color from red to green. Yesterday I tried something new - I tried to make a construct right near the projection that would divide the light rays in two, thus creating a mirrored image of the clock projection right above it. A few minutes later I noticed that there was a slight reddish glow near the upper-edge of the projection image. I fell asleep.

When I woke up in the morning, there happened to be a short moment (a few seconds or so), when I saw everything around me brighter and more detailed. I don't know how it happened, but I could see a red blurb in about the position I visualized the mirrored projection. I saw some red glow around the other edges of the projection as well. After falling asleep again, I could no longer see so faint changes in colors and the only thing I could see was the slight glow above the projection (the one I had visualized).

I saw that house again in the dreams. It's small, green, cosy and kind-of feels like home. I have seen it a few times before. I can't remember having seen such a building in real life though.

In one previous dream I went there to visit some old people - an old aunt I never knew existed or something like that. Then we just sat around a table and talked about all kind of things before I left again. The house was as clean as an old couple could keep it.

This time I was in that house, packing stuff together to move somewhere else. The house was no longer clean, there was stuff cluttered everywhere, a lot of dust covering the furniture and so on. Strangely though, I can't remember many windows - perhaps there were a few small ones.

So far I have seen 2 old green wooden houses. One with small windows opening to the street and another with large windows opening to a garden. I don't know what to think of it except for green is my favorite color =).

Something also happened at school today. I was waiting in a lecture room, too tired to do anything meaningful when I saw something dripping on my right hand. I even clearly felt it hit my hand, but when it did, it vanished. I couldn't see anything bounce off my hand nor did I hear anything falling onto the floor. It had really looked like a droplet of water had fallen from the ceiling, but my hand was completely dry. I don't know what it was, a tiny psi-ball programmed with the feeling of water?

Monday, September 6, 2010

Dream of a storm

Saw a dream on a great storm on Saaremaa. I was near a shed when it started flashing lightning and burst out raining. Lightning hit a perry tree roughly 10 meters in front of me and it fell over towards me. I wasn't hit, but it was a close call. Rain was so intense that it too broke a few trees and bushes.

Dad found one more juice package with a code somewhere in the kitchen. It started to haunt me: "How can it be possible that I registered all the packages, got 5000 points in total and there is one more package although I already sent code stickers with a total of 5000 points back to the company." It got me a bit nervous and I had difficulties practicing pk in the evening. Well, I figured it out eventually. About a month ago there was a morning when I remember having had a strange feeling. A feeling as if I had made a mistake in writing my phone number somewhere, but I couldn't remember where. Now it all made sense - I actually had 6000 points (with 1000 on a separate account with the same name) and now sent a wrong sticker back. So, now I can see how they drew the winners - by sticker codes or by registered accounts =P. An interesting chain of events.


Before completely falling asleep, I was chatting with someone again. He asked something like: "Can you receive multidimensional imagery?" and started testing the limits of the perception of my mind. I saw a few graphs rotating around, but couldn't figure out how I should look at them - they didn't seem to make any sense. I realized what was happening and quickly woke myself up so that I could remember it in the morning. I might have been talking with people like this without even telling the difference between my own thoughts and the thoughts of others.

It's probably thanks to the gym, but the next morning I woke up before alarm and enjoyed the feeling of lying on the bed without any thoughts. I think it took a few minutes before I started thinking on random stuff again.

Sunday, September 5, 2010

Mind vs eye focus

While practicing pk on random objects on the table today, a comparison popped into my mind. I compared focusing my mind on objects with focusing my eyes on objects and found a lot of similarities. To some extent, it even felt similar when I changed the object I focused my mind on. While changing from a small object like a pen to a larger object like the table, I felt psi pressure and frequency adjusting in my head.

Had some difficulties feeling the exact object I wanted to. My mind occasionally shifted to other nearby objects again. While focusing on the pen or on the fan (not plugged in), I noticed that the propeller occasionally rotated slightly. Could be a coincidence, but my laptop suddenly snapped out of showing me a screensaver while I was trying to levitate the table (I can usually get the feeling quite easily, but so far it hasn't moved remarkably).

Took an attempt on the uncovered psi-wheel again. When I opened the cover and the psi-wheel had come to a halt, I could rotate it slightly in both directions until I happened to think: "Maybe it's the wind?" and I couldn't even budge it anymore. I thought of wind because its movement was unstable - it was slightly rocking up and down while rotating. After thinking this, it stopped rocking, so it couldn't have been wind. So, I closed the cover, thinking that I could perhaps trick my subconscious into moving it covered - then there just can't be any wind. To my surprise, I could slightly rotate it again .. for a short moment, until I hit another mind-block.

Saturday, September 4, 2010

Rebuilding confidence


Yesterday evening I tried to move the uncovered psi-wheel again, but only got it to twitch by negligible amounts.

While practicing stasis field on the propeller today, I noticed that when I was walking and thinking about stuff other than pk, the propeller slowed down almost to a halt. But when I was actually attempting to slow it down, it occasionally sped up instead and resulted in a jerky movement. Having been away from practicing pk for about 2 weeks, the skill of slowing the propeller down actually hasn't recessed. My imagination of my own skills has lowered.

I also tried moving a playing card while listening to music. I had no problems connecting with it and feeling it move although I have been feeling really rusty recently. Again, I need to think of myself succeeding and believe I can do it again.

Went to the kitchen later and happened to look outside the window. It had just been raining and now the sky was clearing up. It was completely silent (no wind) and I saw tree branches rising up after the great shower. I visualized the feeling of heavy wind pushing these branches down and rocking the trees some. A slight wind picked up and the branches I visualized bending down actually bent down because of the wind. I stopped it suddenly and everything was completely silent again (many thanks to stasis field practice). I was amazed for a first attempt at raising wind.

I came up with a new exercise before going to sleep. I have a projector clock set up so that when I'm lying in bed and open my eyes, I see time on the ceiling. I could try to bend the path of photons so that the projection would move around the ceiling, rotate or scale. Couldn't move it much on the first try though.

Friday, September 3, 2010

In the meanwhile

A couple of days ago I meditated in front of the mirror before going to sleep. For some reason, I was afraid of my own reflection again.

I tried to have an OBE after a while, but my head and chest got stuck. I couldn't let go of the consciousness in my body.

Other than that, I haven't been practicing much lately. Should continue my regular pk practice on random stuff or it would become more difficult to get the feeling of objects around me.

Light in the dark

We held a hazing of frosh at school yesterday and I could visit the catacombs (-1 floor) of the school building for the first time. I was down there, waiting in the darkness so that I could scream when they came close.

While waiting down there, I started seeing light. At first I thought it was my mobile phone glowing, but it wasn't. It was completely pitch black and there couldn't have been any reflecting light. However, I could almost see the texture of the ground, pipes on the walls and my own clothes (barely, but still). So, I thought that maybe I am glowing in the dark and maybe all living beings are. In fact, I saw a 2nd year girl slightly glowing in the dark as well.

What was even more weird, the source of light was in different place each time. At first it seemed to have come from my chest, then from my pocket, then from my left eye and finally from both eyes. It changed every time my eyes readjusted to the darkness (from having seen light and being left in the dark again).

There was one more thing I noticed - there were these spots like when you take a photo in the dark, you get random colorful spots (noise). Weirdly enough, some objects seemed to have more spots than others. For example, there were more around me and my phone than in the rest of the room. I thought I saw waves of these colorful spots around my mobile phone. Slightly reminded me of this post: http://sussch-daweird.blogspot.com/2009/12/distracting-waves.html.

After that, there was a party during which I got to know a few newcomer-physicists. It happened again that I recognized people without having met them before. This time there were unusually many newcomers whom I knew I had seen before somewhere. I'm starting to think: "Where have I been and what have I done in the dreams?" Perhaps that's where I have seen them..

Wednesday, September 1, 2010

Won a campaign

It's been a while. I took a week off for at least a short "summer" holiday on Saaremaa. I was surprised how difficult it was to feel psi there. Anyway, as always, I had so much to do that I barely had any time for practicing.

Well, we tried messing around with the lamps, we tried to put out a candle, tried running up trees and shielding ourselves against the rain. Kevin even succeeded in lessening the probability of getting his shoes wet while walking through puddles in the dark (about 1 km of puddles before he got his shoes wet).

In the meanwhile, my aunt ran over a deer and broke their car. Uncle said something that caught my attention: "They have to change the car or it will start crashing over and over again. It's going to attract accidents." For a moment, I realized again how much of our so-called reality is created by ourselves.

Before going to Saaremaa, I had been collecting cookie wrappings and juice boxes because of a campaign. We were short on money and I thought it would be fun to win some. A few days ago I received a phone call that I had won 5000 EEK, which is about 300 EUR. Yay, it's my new record. I remember winning about 100 EEK when I was little.

Remembered that one morning I strongly felt as if I had been seriously chatting on paranormal subjects with my father the previous night. When I came back to Tartu and asked my father about it, he couldn't confirm it, as he simply couldn't remember his dreams.