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The goal of this blog is to motivate myself and others for further practice as well as provide details that might explain what's going on..


Tuesday, January 31, 2012

Cleared a blockage

My ego has raised its head a bit. Yesterday I encountered a couple of emotions that I haven't experienced for a while. It was a beautiful day and I had a tendency to become frustrated in my mind.

Yesterday I practiced alternate-nostril breathing stronger than before. I started to feel unbearably good in my stomach and had to pause for a while. A blockage cleared out and I didn't have a problem with being out of breath again. Though, I was pouring with sweat and the bed got all wet. Now I can take it one level further again (2x more pumps with Wahi Guru's per breath). Catching up to what I could do a while ago.

Interesting, how before coming to the service, I always had the problem of nostrils being shut. Since starting pranayama practice again, I haven't had that problem anymore.

Almost couldn't sleep at night. Kept waking up every 30 minutes or so, expecting the alarm to ring.

Monday, January 30, 2012

Snapping again

Almost slept the whole Friday and slept some extra on Sunday evening as well.

Experienced a lot of heat waves yesterday during my attempts to push exhaustion aside. Had objects snap around me very frequently. For most of the time,  the objects that made snapping sounds were close to the astral body. Tried focusing on an object once and felt as if I had almost lost my ability to stand up and walk right. The feeling of floatiness has also increased.

Sunday, January 29, 2012

A pic

Inspired by Owltwelve's meditation on the wind kasina, I focused on the visualization of wind rocking tree branches in my mind. Started to feel a cold breeze around my face indoors.

It's strange, just how easily the feeling of a picture becomes lost during processing. The sketches drawn by hand always seem a lot more lively than the vectorized and brushed pictures. It might be all the small details, shading and stuff. Or it may be that I gradually lose track of the feeling during lengthy processing.

Telescopin' for new fairy tales

A sketch and a brushed version.

Saturday, January 28, 2012

Sleepy

For some reason I'm feeling pretty tired. Slept long and slept some extra during the day. Feels similar to how visiting crowded places does.

A lot of dreams of visiting places that I haven't seen before, talking to people I haven't met before and so on..

Friday, January 27, 2012

Bindu flowing

Pranayama exercises have led me back to waves of heat, the flowing of Bindu fluid and occasional blank-outs of the mind.

I don't think I've recently had any pk / geisting events though. With the exception of improved empathy, memory of when I was little(-er) and stuff. Weather has also turned nice(r) again.

Monday, January 23, 2012

Peek the corners

Yesterday evening I attempted to post something on the forum when the cursor teleported to the top-right corner of the screen, closing the window with all the tabs. Opened it again, but then the router crashed. Found it amusing, gave up and went to meditate instead.

Suddenly mother called from Spain. The ringing startled me, causing a dense ring-shaped cloud of psi to shoot out from the chest. She wanted to have a video conversation via Skype. Postponed the conversation and reset the router and stuff.

On the road today, I tried to glance at the road behind the next corner. With the first attempt I could see the road, trees, fields and approaching cars very clearly. Nice.. The next couple of attempts were also successful, though not as vivid.

Sunday, January 22, 2012

Addicted

Became addicted to playing Fallout New Vegas in my free time. A few days ago I suddenly developed the urge to watch Naruto Shippuuden again, as I had the feeling that the fillers were over again. Took a break in Fallout NV to watch Shippuuden episodes 242 - 245. Amazing episodes, especially the last ones. Naruto met his true self and hugged it ^,^.

One of the guys at the forum (Alar34) has had dreams of a symbol, eye within an egg. Visited the KUMU art museum yesterday and stumbled upon a painting of the same symbol. Though, the painting didn't emit that much psi. On the painting, the symbol was recursive (one around another).

Grandmother baked an apple pie. Tasted it and then tried to alter its taste this time. I consider it as a success, because the taste did indeed change, though, only a little.

Friday, January 20, 2012

Remote tasting

On last Sunday, grandma baked a cake, but said it wasn't too good. I was about to taste it, but felt its taste in my mouth before the first piece of the cake reached my mouth. Actually, it seemed more like designing the taste before physically tasting it, as I remember thinking "the taste of eggs and cinnamon should stand out a bit more." The taste then changed. It was somewhat mind-blowing for me, how the actual taste was exactly the same as the one "designed". Acquiring the taste of food just by looking at it has become more successful as well.

Last week there were a lot of blackouts there. This week it turned out there had been a larger blackout and the air conditioning systems were broken. It was a bit cold for one night and quite noisy for almost a week.

One night I woke up for a sec and saw a blue LED from a roommate's laptop. Thought: "His laptop is still switched on? Ah well, maybe he's downloading something." Then perhaps a couple of minutes later, his laptop woke up from hibernate and started playing a video. He woke up: "Wtf," his mouse flew across the floor before he managed to close it again. On the same day, my laptop also acted strange (at least one key didn't work and right mouse button actions were triggered when I clicked the left button).

For multiple times I've noticed that sometimes when I walk past a radio, it starts to play static noise. Sometimes it just turns silent and for a couple of times, something has happened at the studio (a crash or something, so that the station is off air for a longer period of time).

A lot of close-calls while some of the room-mates were driving. I once told one of the roommates to take it easy as we were not in a hurry. I think he was convinced that there would be an accident one day anyway. The next morning (a nasty snow storm), he lost control over the car and got stuck on a field, 1 m from the trees. Almost nothing was wrong with the car, it just happened to be on a snowdrift with its bottom in such a way that the wheels would spin freely.

Managed to integrate a pranayama exercise into my daily schedule again.

Tuesday, January 17, 2012

Visit in dreams

Happened to read a webpage on NSA and RNM. Remote Neural Monitoring and Manipulation seem a bit far-fetched, but who knows, what kind of tech they may have there. Anyway, the real pearl was the section "Conversations With Research Scientist Initiates: Brain and Technology Update" by "©1995-1997 Leading Edge International Research Group". It generated a lot of thought-material, stuff to meditate on and to experiment with. Thanks for the link!

While reading an article on EMP today, I found more and more hints at NSA's RNM. Perhaps it's not so far-fetched at all.. =/

Intended on remembering my dreams again, for change.

Dream 1: There was a bunch of young soldiers; we went jogging. The guys in front spread. Since it's not allowed to lag behind (the alignment needs to remain), I kept following the one in front of me (everyone has to align themselves by the others at right and at front). He ran through a bunch of people meditating on the grass. One of the people meditating stopped me and asked me why I was following him. For some unknown reason, I said: "It's the goal of my life". Totally neutral and calm, he asked: "Is this not a goal of your life?" Started leaking Bindu fluid and psi, couldn't stop it and woke up. It was cold and I had been sleeping crouched (makes it difficult to control the flow of psi in the body) on my left side.

Dream 2: This one was sort of OBE-ish (very real and detailed). I was sleeping in bed, just as if I were awake. Some people entered from the outside door. They were actively discussing something in the hallway. Couldn't make out any words or sentences though (as if too tired to comprehend). At some point I jumped down from the bed to take a look at who's there. Felt that someone's going to open the door and step in to visit me. It was one of the managers from the student satellite project. I was quite surprised and jumped back into bed. He disappeared / the dream ended.

Sunday, January 15, 2012

Häädemeeste UFO exhibition

Visited Kiek in de Kök museum yesterday. In addition to a lot of weapons and art, there was an exhibition of UFO photos of the Häädemeeste phenomena. It looks like an alien base with UFOs flying in and out regularly. Sometimes distortions in the traveling of light can be seen (looks like a mirage on grass; ground behind the area with watery reflection seems to lift higher - above the trees). Small humanoid figures of light that can only be captured on camera. Documentary in Estonian.

01:20 in Häädemeeste ufo 3

Anyway, they showed a documentary of the bombardment of this town in the '40s. With all that empathy, it felt quite bad. Subconsciously started to practice stasis field on the bombs there. Now that I think of it, I've heard quite a few miraculous stories of some of these bombs dropping in the proximity of a few meters and not exploding.

Had interesting conversations with a wardrobe guard and the guy who was in charge of the Häädemeeste lights exhibition. Amazing, what's all happening right here and I'm not aware of it. Poltergeist stories, alien tech underground and stuff. Got to visit the library and archives sometime.

Watched the wedding photos of an acquaintance of grandfather. Some nice orbs, one of which was especially  bright and colorful.
Orb on a sleeve

Friday, January 13, 2012

Trust thy path

Subconscious was right yet again - no matter what I would've done, waiting was the right choice (though difficult). Got to trust the subconscious more and reduce these unnecessary actions.

Played with wind and flags at the drill square again.

I've found that staring at flags induces a pleasurable feeling (the feeling of flags flapping around in slight wind). Would be neat to develop empathy to the same extent with other objects as well.

Also, I found it interesting, how the feeling / character of a driver transfers to the machine. It was pretty strange to see a mighty truck with low self-confidence moving around. Then another driver took the seat and the feeling of the truck changed in an instant.

With freshmen in service, I tried to form a cloud construct around them, which would induce laughter. Well, I guess it backfired or something and although everyone was in a funny mood, we were the ones who struggled hard against giggling. The head person on duty welcomed the newcomers with 10-15 minutes of law and regulation numbers, according to which they were accepted. While we were singing national hymn with them (which turned out as a noisy mess), one of the nearby roofs shed its cover of snow with a loud bang.

Sunday, January 8, 2012

Thumb thru metal?

Remembered a strange event back at the barracks. I was stuffing some clothes deep into the locker, looking at what was going on in the hallway. The shelf was quite full, but there seemed to be enough space for what I was trying to put in there. It didn't come to mind that there might not be enough room for my hand to fit in. I think I was pulling my hand back when *snap*, my thumb was hit hard and I found it resting on the edge of the shelf. This reminded me of how father closed the car door with his thumb inside .. it phased through the door. Though, in my case, the internals of the thumb were not damaged, just the nail was deformed a little. Don't know if it was something weird or my tired mind just didn't get what was going on; logged it down for later reference.

White skeleton

Tried the white skeleton meditation technique yesterday evening. It took slightly more than an hour to visualize each bone glowing white, as instructed on MeditationExpert. Sometimes I would feel slight pain or sickness in an area, sometimes a wave of heat emerged and propagated through the body. A few times I almost lost awareness of the body and saw the light emitted by the bones. After the exercise, I went to bed to focus on my breathing. I could see with my eyes closed again. Always fell asleep before getting out of body though.

Had a dream where I was observing someone who found his friend Conan infested with an astral being ("demon" of sorts?).

Saturday, January 7, 2012

Fuss

On Christmas vacation, a few weeks ago, I had decided to play a prank with pk. I was convinced that public transport was free of charge for people who serve the military (at least, that's what we were told). Still, I wanted to practice micro-pk and make sure that nobody would come to check the tickets while I'm on the bus. Then 2 weeks later, just before going back, I stumbled on a claim that public transport is not free in that town. It turned out that I had been stowing away without knowing it myself =/. Well, luckily pk works and I didn't have to learn it the hard way.

Occasionally it was cold to stand in line without moving. In order to put up with it, I once visualized the symbol of the Sun along with heat building up inside the body. At the same moment, a strong whirlwind appeared, swaying the trees and tossing our hats. Another technique - I visualize the central flame with branches from one of my dreams, burning in a similar to the Ki in Dragon Ball Kai. It would usually make me feel warmer pretty quickly.

I'm supposed to be a driver, but I don't have the license needed. Also, they don't want to offer permits for acquiring licenses. I feel I have to act real fast, but I don't know when, how and what to do. After mopping the floors for 3 weeks (nothing was organized), I got out again, but now my wallet was missing. Meditated for a while, reconstructing the chain of events and learned that my wallet is in a safe place that I can't access during the weekend. Visited the bank and got access to my account again. Later it turned out that I would have to consult with the higher-ups before registering for a drivers course. Another week extra? *Facepalm* What a fuss..

During one of the meditation sessions, I asked:

"What should I do?" 

The answer was something like:

"It doesn't matter which path you choose, for they all lead to the same point."

The answer was graphical though.

This pilgrimage sure highlights my insecurities from the deep.