In one of the dreams several days ago, I remember looking out of the window.
Strange clouds appeared in the sky. There was a sense of something about to happen. All sorts of bugs and animals appeared on the doors and windows, looking for ways to escape from what was about to happen. They wanted to get inside.
Might be a suggestion to stay indoors when it looks like something strange is about to happen.
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In another dream, there seemed to be some sort of a new generation of children. Brighter and more liberated than us old guys. Practised some parkour in a department store with them.
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The last few days have been quite stormy and snowy. Could perhaps practice walking on snow again soon.
After a few stressful moments some days ago, there was a sudden jolt in the awareness. Along with it, the top of the head opened up and something started trickling down the chest again.
That stress also caused the throat chakra to close up. As a side-effect, a painful pimple appeared on the skin, at the location of the throat chakra. After some meditation on the desired attitude towards life, it slowly disappeared again.
Friday, November 30, 2012
Monday, November 26, 2012
Struggle of honour
One night without disturbing dreams and then lost the energy with the next one.
A rather sad morning, full of karmic effects.
Realized that I often bash right in, when I see an obstacle. Then it hurts and the more it hurts, the more I increase the speed and force. Then it hurts even more .. so on.
Also, for some reason, the mind still considers difficulty as a matter of honour. The more miserable, the more humility, the more challenge, the better.
One more mind pattern: everything must be in balance. When there's joy, there must be misery and vice versa. However, when looked at from a holistic point of view, then nothing can be out of balance. So, the idea of balancing seems to be just a habit or a construct.
Want to overcome all this. Want to change the attitude towards everything.
I guess it might be rather funny and sad for me to look at me struggling there.
A rather sad morning, full of karmic effects.
Realized that I often bash right in, when I see an obstacle. Then it hurts and the more it hurts, the more I increase the speed and force. Then it hurts even more .. so on.
Also, for some reason, the mind still considers difficulty as a matter of honour. The more miserable, the more humility, the more challenge, the better.
One more mind pattern: everything must be in balance. When there's joy, there must be misery and vice versa. However, when looked at from a holistic point of view, then nothing can be out of balance. So, the idea of balancing seems to be just a habit or a construct.
Want to overcome all this. Want to change the attitude towards everything.
I guess it might be rather funny and sad for me to look at me struggling there.
Sunday, November 25, 2012
Cultivating
Had been having slightly disturbing dreams again. One of the most recent one was as follows:
We've been summoned to practice some sort of chorus songs on the stage. Well, most of us weren't doing that .. at least not all the time. We were aware that 'they' would come and check on us every now and then. Ignored it.
Here they came. Only 2 of us were singing (dream me and one of the girls). Seeing that we were not doing our job, 'they' formed a meeting. We took seats in a row. Noticed that to my left, all of the chorus members were male and to my right, all of them were female.
The ones I refer to 'they' might've been managers or something. Anyway, 'they' asked why we were not doing what we had been ordered to do. In chorus, we all asked them an existential question, which for us was more important than obeying any orders. The managers felt cornered and said they've been exposed and .. nude content. Fled in order to maintain the energy. They didn't know the answer anyway and had to opt for their last resort for control.
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Practised some dangerous energy cultivation yesterday. Won the gamble and got to keep the energy and move it up into the head.
It was challenging to cope with the emotions yesterday evening. Though, by not acting (or thinking) on them, the emotions were converted into heat.
Picked up an old practice of visualizing the density and thickness of the psi field around the body today. Also, slept while trying to keep focus on the field as well as on the mattress and the pillow.
All of this together seems to be having a nice effect. Waves of heat, slushing psi field around the body and other familiar feelings.
We've been summoned to practice some sort of chorus songs on the stage. Well, most of us weren't doing that .. at least not all the time. We were aware that 'they' would come and check on us every now and then. Ignored it.
Here they came. Only 2 of us were singing (dream me and one of the girls). Seeing that we were not doing our job, 'they' formed a meeting. We took seats in a row. Noticed that to my left, all of the chorus members were male and to my right, all of them were female.
The ones I refer to 'they' might've been managers or something. Anyway, 'they' asked why we were not doing what we had been ordered to do. In chorus, we all asked them an existential question, which for us was more important than obeying any orders. The managers felt cornered and said they've been exposed and .. nude content. Fled in order to maintain the energy. They didn't know the answer anyway and had to opt for their last resort for control.
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Practised some dangerous energy cultivation yesterday. Won the gamble and got to keep the energy and move it up into the head.
It was challenging to cope with the emotions yesterday evening. Though, by not acting (or thinking) on them, the emotions were converted into heat.
Picked up an old practice of visualizing the density and thickness of the psi field around the body today. Also, slept while trying to keep focus on the field as well as on the mattress and the pillow.
All of this together seems to be having a nice effect. Waves of heat, slushing psi field around the body and other familiar feelings.
Friday, November 23, 2012
Ideas on pranayama
Found something new in the good old pranayama practice.
It's usually suggested to breath out slowly. Though, I found it to be even more beneficial to breath into the central channel instead of breathing out from the body. With each such breath, a lump of hot psi formed in the navel. It would then slowly rise up the spine and go to the chakras above the head.
Another thing that is usually suggested is to keep the eyes open and keep the eyes fixed on the tip of the nose. For me, it usually feels better to close the eyes and then fix the focus on the tip of the nose. This would enhance blind-sight or 3rd eye vision as well.
Multiple moments of breath cessation during the evening.
Re-sparked the interest in learning martial arts (it's been 15 years). Feels right, for some reason.
It's usually suggested to breath out slowly. Though, I found it to be even more beneficial to breath into the central channel instead of breathing out from the body. With each such breath, a lump of hot psi formed in the navel. It would then slowly rise up the spine and go to the chakras above the head.
Another thing that is usually suggested is to keep the eyes open and keep the eyes fixed on the tip of the nose. For me, it usually feels better to close the eyes and then fix the focus on the tip of the nose. This would enhance blind-sight or 3rd eye vision as well.
Multiple moments of breath cessation during the evening.
Re-sparked the interest in learning martial arts (it's been 15 years). Feels right, for some reason.
Thursday, November 22, 2012
Ideas on energy cultivation
Busy times.
Felt pretty floaty yesterday. Today I was just tired.
Might've caught cold again today morning. Hope I didn't .. found a point of concentration that kept me calm and warm enough.
Left the laptop at work yesterday evening, as I left for home late again. At home, meditated some before bed. Sister entered the dark room and said: "Wow, I can see your aura." According to her, it looked white-ish. She has also been seeing these blue and red flashes of light on people as well as white flashes at random places sometimes.
A couple of days ago I felt rather e-motionless. Though, now it feels like the mind is slowly focusing more and more on ego and emotions again.
For energy cultivation, it seems that the following are important:
Felt pretty floaty yesterday. Today I was just tired.
Might've caught cold again today morning. Hope I didn't .. found a point of concentration that kept me calm and warm enough.
Left the laptop at work yesterday evening, as I left for home late again. At home, meditated some before bed. Sister entered the dark room and said: "Wow, I can see your aura." According to her, it looked white-ish. She has also been seeing these blue and red flashes of light on people as well as white flashes at random places sometimes.
A couple of days ago I felt rather e-motionless. Though, now it feels like the mind is slowly focusing more and more on ego and emotions again.
For energy cultivation, it seems that the following are important:
- Eat well (a lot and varied food. Focus on the feeling of enjoying the food.)
- Sleep moderate (not too much, not too little. Focus on the feeling of enjoying the sleep.)
- Keep warm
- Regular mild physical exercise (it's good as long as it's not tiring)
- Sleep straight (don't crouch, don't turn much. Crouching tends to block the flow of psi.)
- While sleeping, you can have loops in the pose (resonant cavities between the Ida and Pingala channels) <- Feel I should draw some sometime
- Wash the body often (dirt comes with entities)
- Avoid resonating with emotions or feelings (tends to give birth to parasitic constructs or entities)
- Visualize your self as a wise sage and analyze everything with this intelligence and wisdom.
- Maintain the attitude of respect and gratitude towards everything you or others are or aren't, do or don't do.
- Sometimes focus inward (chakras, bindu points), sometimes outward - empathy with nature, people (have it slushing back and forth, to avoid sedimentation in the channels). Practice of pk is really useful here.
Monday, November 19, 2012
Increase in empathy
Had aborted a pk experiment that I had started with a great urge yesterday. Though, subconscious was still at it in the half-dream state.
Noticed an improvement in empathy today. Walked through a room full of young children and noticed their high level of empathy. A kid found himself in my way, happened to look at him once and recognized something familiar. He kept staring at me after that.
People on the street feel a bit different too.
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It seems that the sadness and confusion are still burning. Joined father on a trip to a department store. Something got my attention there, walked up to it and it cheered me up a lot.
A bunch of transparent plastic flowers with multicolored LEDs inside.
A transparent plastic polar bear with matte finish, white LEDs lighting it up from the inside.
A similar lamp with the shape of a happy moose.
Noticed an improvement in empathy today. Walked through a room full of young children and noticed their high level of empathy. A kid found himself in my way, happened to look at him once and recognized something familiar. He kept staring at me after that.
People on the street feel a bit different too.
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It seems that the sadness and confusion are still burning. Joined father on a trip to a department store. Something got my attention there, walked up to it and it cheered me up a lot.
A bunch of transparent plastic flowers with multicolored LEDs inside.
A transparent plastic polar bear with matte finish, white LEDs lighting it up from the inside.
A similar lamp with the shape of a happy moose.
Zapper-based pulsed system
Had an interesting dream last night.
Like in many other dreams, the environment was a slightly modified version of the summerhouse.
We were in the old farmhouse, cleaning up. Or rather, a person was doing that, with some acquaintances. He / she (shall assume the former one) felt like a spiritual teacher or guru of sorts.
I was observing, knowing not what to do. Feeling empty and lacking a purpose, due to the last night's ponderings.
The teacher asked me if I could help him out with something. He wanted me to build an object for him .. he then continued to describe what it had to be like. Said ok and left for drawing it down, even though this task seemed as pointless as building a ladder out of bread. Respect it, but sometimes I would have difficulties realizing just how something like this would answer any of those questions. Perhaps the problem is that I tend to learn best from self-experience..?
Anyway, the object he wanted was a modified zapper. Pretty much an electrolytic capacitor that can be plugged into the mains to charge and can then be shorted to weld something together (or zap someone). Though, he put a lot of emphasis on the orientation and the placement of the wires.
Having gone to the other building to sketch it down and hatch some ideas, the words of the teacher faded away. There was a TV on, with a really awkward show (freaky mutants attempting to stimulate the sexual energy of people watching TV). Tried not to watch it and focus on the schematics instead. A moment later, the show transformed and got my attention .. it had started showing electromagnetic principles.
Suddenly it clicked together. That capacitor, those metal plates, spirals and wires .. realized the working principle of a ZPE active pulsed system.
Like in many other dreams, the environment was a slightly modified version of the summerhouse.
We were in the old farmhouse, cleaning up. Or rather, a person was doing that, with some acquaintances. He / she (shall assume the former one) felt like a spiritual teacher or guru of sorts.
I was observing, knowing not what to do. Feeling empty and lacking a purpose, due to the last night's ponderings.
The teacher asked me if I could help him out with something. He wanted me to build an object for him .. he then continued to describe what it had to be like. Said ok and left for drawing it down, even though this task seemed as pointless as building a ladder out of bread. Respect it, but sometimes I would have difficulties realizing just how something like this would answer any of those questions. Perhaps the problem is that I tend to learn best from self-experience..?
Anyway, the object he wanted was a modified zapper. Pretty much an electrolytic capacitor that can be plugged into the mains to charge and can then be shorted to weld something together (or zap someone). Though, he put a lot of emphasis on the orientation and the placement of the wires.
Having gone to the other building to sketch it down and hatch some ideas, the words of the teacher faded away. There was a TV on, with a really awkward show (freaky mutants attempting to stimulate the sexual energy of people watching TV). Tried not to watch it and focus on the schematics instead. A moment later, the show transformed and got my attention .. it had started showing electromagnetic principles.
Suddenly it clicked together. That capacitor, those metal plates, spirals and wires .. realized the working principle of a ZPE active pulsed system.
To save the mankind! .. hold your horses, mate
Yesterday, a great urge developed again .. wanted to help the mankind.
Proposed the idea and it pretty much didn't echo. This is not the first time something like this has happened.
Took my time to analyze Owltwelve's points. Emotions started running wild and burning into heat, which propagated around the body. Occasionally visualized adding firewood to that fire, trying to keep it going .. and purifying the mind.
A few questions that have had me puzzled for quite a while:
I guess some of the emotions did burn away during this pondering. Still, since this "battle" has been recurring, there must be something I'm yet to realize here.
Thank you all for bringing this up. Got to learn the point first, before any bold and dangerous attempts.
Proposed the idea and it pretty much didn't echo. This is not the first time something like this has happened.
Took my time to analyze Owltwelve's points. Emotions started running wild and burning into heat, which propagated around the body. Occasionally visualized adding firewood to that fire, trying to keep it going .. and purifying the mind.
A few questions that have had me puzzled for quite a while:
- What's the difference between acting and not acting?
- If there's no difference, then how come one has to practise this and that to attain liberation?
- From the holistic perspective, there shouldn't be any need to learn anything, because everything is already there. There's nothing that needs to be done, because everything is doing by themselves.
- Say you see someone struggling and intend to help them get through more easily.
- From the dualistic point of view, by helping them, you would be messing with their lesson of life. So, helping others would be more egoistic than actually not helping them?
- From the holistic point of view, by helping them, you would just end up helping other aspects of one higher self.
- Honing skills just for one's own good is no good at all, right?
- If by helping others, one would only be spoiling the lessons of the others, then what's the point of skills or superpowers anyway?
- From the holistic point of view, there's no difference between oneself and others, so there wouldn't be any difference between honing skills for one's own good or for the good of the whole mankind.
- However, from the holistic point of view again, there doesn't seem to be any place for skills anyway.
- The good feeling of helping someone.. where does it come from? Ego? Emotions?
- War can be defined as "an act of forcing an opinion on someone".
- When one projects the feelings of love, caring and compassion towards someone, is this on par with an attack of violence?
- It is said that one can't fight a war with another.
- However, when one hugs their fears, these melt away. So, a projection of love and compassion towards fear and anger might seem to be a successful combo.
- Love and care, wisdom and knowledge are associated with light and .. labelled as good stuff. However, what's propagated as a necessity for enlightenment, there's detachment aka "A wise man does not hug nor hate the world."
- So, enlightenment wouldn't have much to do with love nor caring. Would associate more with cold-heartedly stepping out, leaving other people suffering. Rather selfish, no?
- That doesn't make much sense, especially since from the holistic point of view, there's no "one" that has become enlightened. A man could only say they're enlightened when that's what all men are. This is not achieved by detachment.
- The problem here is that both feel right and surely, we can read about different sorts of saints from the history.
- A good quote from the movie "Hugo": "the world is like one big machine; and no machine has extra parts … every part has a purpose."
- This doesn't seem to fit with the ideas of
- action and inaction being the same,
- skills having no meaning,
- there being nothing to do or learn (since everything is one whole anyway)
I guess some of the emotions did burn away during this pondering. Still, since this "battle" has been recurring, there must be something I'm yet to realize here.
Thank you all for bringing this up. Got to learn the point first, before any bold and dangerous attempts.
Sunday, November 18, 2012
Serial experiments
A couple of nights ago, somewhere in the half-dream state, I focused on the sound of wind in the Sushumna channel. Hearing the noise clearly and loudly enough, it popped into mind to try to modulate it. Started up a humming sound somewhere, pitched up the frequency and applied it to the channel.
This resulted in a pretty weird sensation. Awareness popped out of body short after commencing the test.
Went straight to bed when I came home yesterday evening. Being out of ideas for the dreams, I got bored at 4 or 5 AM. Several meditation attempts. Woke up at 6 AM, with an intent to practice pranayama, but that was a yawn party.
Remembered one more experiment. On the way home yesterday, I visualized expanding the consciousness to the surroundings. Also, intended on becoming more connected to the physical realm. Started feeling and seeing hints of some sort of objects on the asphalt.
Somewhere during the half-dream state last night, I remember looking around in the room and seeing hints of a lot of objects everywhere. The space was thick of different lifeforms.
Quite likely that this was inspired by having seen The Mystery of the Third Planet a couple of days ago.
So far I've been seeing blue flashes of light everywhere. Though, on Friday evening, I saw red flashes of light on the head of a coworker while he was talking. Looked away and saw another. Then another and once more. Weird.
This resulted in a pretty weird sensation. Awareness popped out of body short after commencing the test.
Went straight to bed when I came home yesterday evening. Being out of ideas for the dreams, I got bored at 4 or 5 AM. Several meditation attempts. Woke up at 6 AM, with an intent to practice pranayama, but that was a yawn party.
Remembered one more experiment. On the way home yesterday, I visualized expanding the consciousness to the surroundings. Also, intended on becoming more connected to the physical realm. Started feeling and seeing hints of some sort of objects on the asphalt.
Somewhere during the half-dream state last night, I remember looking around in the room and seeing hints of a lot of objects everywhere. The space was thick of different lifeforms.
Quite likely that this was inspired by having seen The Mystery of the Third Planet a couple of days ago.
So far I've been seeing blue flashes of light everywhere. Though, on Friday evening, I saw red flashes of light on the head of a coworker while he was talking. Looked away and saw another. Then another and once more. Weird.
Friday, November 16, 2012
Garden of pk fun
A space exhibition was opened at the local science and tech popularization centre.
They had an old Russian satellite hanged up below the ceiling. What a feeling .. several tonnes hanging in the air.
Stared at it for a while from different angles.
Wanted to get the feeling of it. Could feel it moving and saw it swinging slightly. Still, thought it would be awesome to practise weight reduction and lift on it. Didn't acquire a good enough accuracy of the feeling of the object. Walked away in order not to look too suspicious.
Attempted stasis field on air bubbles in some sort of oil, too. That wasn't too successful, though.
Tried some sort of a simple game on gravity and space-time distortions. The goal was to hit the button at the right time and have a metal sphere tossed out from the central black hole so that it would travel the spinning plane and fall into a smaller hole. A few failed attempts, then something caught my attention, semi-accidentally hit the button and the sphere flew past the hole, got stuck at the edge of the plane. It was stuck there for a few seconds .. someone requested my attention .. looked back and the ball started coming back from the location where it previously got stuck. Missed the hole by a few mm. This sequence of events didn't look too probable.
A lot of stuff that would be fun to practice with. Had to go back to work, though.
They had an old Russian satellite hanged up below the ceiling. What a feeling .. several tonnes hanging in the air.
Stared at it for a while from different angles.
Wanted to get the feeling of it. Could feel it moving and saw it swinging slightly. Still, thought it would be awesome to practise weight reduction and lift on it. Didn't acquire a good enough accuracy of the feeling of the object. Walked away in order not to look too suspicious.
Attempted stasis field on air bubbles in some sort of oil, too. That wasn't too successful, though.
Tried some sort of a simple game on gravity and space-time distortions. The goal was to hit the button at the right time and have a metal sphere tossed out from the central black hole so that it would travel the spinning plane and fall into a smaller hole. A few failed attempts, then something caught my attention, semi-accidentally hit the button and the sphere flew past the hole, got stuck at the edge of the plane. It was stuck there for a few seconds .. someone requested my attention .. looked back and the ball started coming back from the location where it previously got stuck. Missed the hole by a few mm. This sequence of events didn't look too probable.
A lot of stuff that would be fun to practice with. Had to go back to work, though.
Thursday, November 15, 2012
Life design
Yesterday I decided to use pk on the chain of events in this life.
Today I felt different. Found something I had forgotten a while ago.
Everything's a construct, every thought, feeling, emotion leaves a trace. Better let it leave a good trace. Better for everyone.
There's this essence that causes emotions, feelings, thoughts and events. For the lack of a better word, I'll call it attitude. In a sense, it can be seen as attitude towards stuff in your life.
Focused on the attitude of elegance of sorts.
Envision your life, body and work as a design. Have it elegant, smooth and polished. This way it has little friction with its surroundings as well as any events that may hit it.
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While semi-consciously applying this elegance to walking on asphalt while going home, wind appeared and pushed me forward. Also, it felt as if the steps were enhanced by psi - long, fast, effortless, almost weightless.
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Several moments of clarity, which were reflected by sunshine from clear sky during a rather stormy day.
Today I felt different. Found something I had forgotten a while ago.
Everything's a construct, every thought, feeling, emotion leaves a trace. Better let it leave a good trace. Better for everyone.
There's this essence that causes emotions, feelings, thoughts and events. For the lack of a better word, I'll call it attitude. In a sense, it can be seen as attitude towards stuff in your life.
Focused on the attitude of elegance of sorts.
Envision your life, body and work as a design. Have it elegant, smooth and polished. This way it has little friction with its surroundings as well as any events that may hit it.
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While semi-consciously applying this elegance to walking on asphalt while going home, wind appeared and pushed me forward. Also, it felt as if the steps were enhanced by psi - long, fast, effortless, almost weightless.
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Several moments of clarity, which were reflected by sunshine from clear sky during a rather stormy day.
Dreams of emotion-control
Two days ago, had a dream, where I was observing some people. I guess there were 2 or 3 of them .. some sort of superheroes, saving people and stuff.
After a stressful day, I guess one of them lost to their emotions and transformed into some sort of a lifeform (non-human, but had some human features). These beings used emotions to find hosts. Among them, hosts with superpowers were especially treasured, because they could use the host's powers to some extent.
This being targeted another one of the group. He could see, feel them and put forth a lot of effort to fight it, but eventually got transformed as well. This guy that was born from him, looked different from the other one. He had held high hopes of acquiring the host's superpowers, but couldn't use them. However, he still believed he did. For most of the time, these beings had to rely on witchcraft anchored to objects (bones, some powders and rituals).
The new guy now targeted the 3rd one in the group (female, I guess). She had been observing the whole event and also knew what this was about. She stood calm and unaffected and didn't "die".
Next day, one of the coworkers commented on having been vamped upon.
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Yesterday evening, after practising some Trataka, I had a dream where I almost lost most of the the cultivated energy again.
Held it for as long as I could and at some moment the dream transformed. Suddenly saw, how the figure of attraction was actually a monster. A partially failed experiment. The dream ended by feeling compassion towards that creature.
Tuesday, November 13, 2012
Nothing to say
Got home really late yesterday. Because of this, ate late and thus couldn't practice pranayama before bed.
It seems to have become a bit more difficult to control the emotions again. Mind wanders more, less silence. Trying to free it more with meditation.
Experienced how mind gives birth to emotion-based constructs. This took a lot of energy and produced something that might come to haunt.
Sorry to everyone, to whom I might've caused harm this way.
Would like to take a weekend off work, for change. It's been a while since the last time I had a free weekend (or weekday). Also, it seems that the upcoming weekend shall be packed with long working hours too. On the other hand, I love being a no-lifing workaholic and I love being somewhat asocial. Makes me feel content with my service to this world. Would be awesome if I learned to meditate through work again.
Have been pretty floaty again lately. Some sudden jolts in the placement of consciousness, relative to the body.
Asked a few questions from a practical instructor. During one of them, I saw a bright blue flash of light at the head of a girl in the classroom. Considered it strange that I would see it on someone else. Previously I have seen it on objects close by, on objects that I've touched or on mirror once.
It seems to have become a bit more difficult to control the emotions again. Mind wanders more, less silence. Trying to free it more with meditation.
Experienced how mind gives birth to emotion-based constructs. This took a lot of energy and produced something that might come to haunt.
Sorry to everyone, to whom I might've caused harm this way.
Would like to take a weekend off work, for change. It's been a while since the last time I had a free weekend (or weekday). Also, it seems that the upcoming weekend shall be packed with long working hours too. On the other hand, I love being a no-lifing workaholic and I love being somewhat asocial. Makes me feel content with my service to this world. Would be awesome if I learned to meditate through work again.
Have been pretty floaty again lately. Some sudden jolts in the placement of consciousness, relative to the body.
Asked a few questions from a practical instructor. During one of them, I saw a bright blue flash of light at the head of a girl in the classroom. Considered it strange that I would see it on someone else. Previously I have seen it on objects close by, on objects that I've touched or on mirror once.
Monday, November 12, 2012
Superfluid lubricant
Today it took less effort to stay unaffected by emotions.
Another familiar astral liquid (or an aspect of the same bindu fluid) started to melt out. For the rational mind, this one associates with a superfluid lubricant or oil of sorts.
Sunday, November 11, 2012
Light and smoke
Wished I would start seeing through the Maya again. Roughly at the same time I remembered a vision from last night.
Had been meditating on a point in the body, I guess, when I started to see light surrounding me from almost every direction. Continued and gradually, more and more light would shine through. After a while, I noticed that to my right, there was a grey-white cloud of smoke, always changing shape. The smoke had been obscuring my sight, but now I had somehow stepped out of the cloud. This smoke was extraordinary in the sense of being alive and being connected to me, a bi-location feeling of sorts.
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That curse of going to work and working late on a Sunday that's also a holiday..
Found it difficult to cope with the emotions at first. Immediately felt better after getting something to eat. Then, stuff magically started working again.
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One thing that I've come to notice is that having the body shape form loop helps to energize it. As if the formed cavity started resonating and trapping energy.
Love to sleep with feet and hands forming loops. Though, sometimes I would wake up so energized that it's difficult to manage it all.
Saturday, November 10, 2012
Loads of work
More work and less free time with the deadlines approaching.
Another long day and continued till midnight at home. Left the laptop building stuff.
This had me bounce a lot between the wake and deep sleep states.
At one point, there was something interesting going on with the 3rd eye. When I breathed in, it felt as if I was breathing through the 3rd eye, not through the nose or mouth. When I breathed out, it went through the nose. I guess at first the 3rd eye closed when I breathed out and opened again when I breathed in. Changed it to keep it open constantly. Seemed to have worked.
Often found myself staring at the room with my eyes closed. No colors, but it was dark anyway.
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All sorts of work-related dreams. Most of them were nightly meetings with other fellow workaholic colleagues. Found it interesting that we were discussing stuff in a dark room and we were aware of it still being the night.
Then, discussions in some foreign room in a foreign country, I guess. Saw 2 people landing with wingsuits outside. They had superman logos on their suits. Pretty stylish, I thought and showed it to one of the colleagues.
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During the night, got the feeling that it had finished building. Woke up and it was true. Typed install .. facepalm .. it caused a full rebuild. Got no more 'notices' and woke up while it was still building.
Put on the headphones to listen to music. This stimulated the bindu point at the back of the head and something cool started trickling down to the throat. That familiar feeling, that familiar taste.
Cupped in at the throat and now it seems to have started emitting heat.
Another long day and continued till midnight at home. Left the laptop building stuff.
This had me bounce a lot between the wake and deep sleep states.
At one point, there was something interesting going on with the 3rd eye. When I breathed in, it felt as if I was breathing through the 3rd eye, not through the nose or mouth. When I breathed out, it went through the nose. I guess at first the 3rd eye closed when I breathed out and opened again when I breathed in. Changed it to keep it open constantly. Seemed to have worked.
Often found myself staring at the room with my eyes closed. No colors, but it was dark anyway.
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All sorts of work-related dreams. Most of them were nightly meetings with other fellow workaholic colleagues. Found it interesting that we were discussing stuff in a dark room and we were aware of it still being the night.
Then, discussions in some foreign room in a foreign country, I guess. Saw 2 people landing with wingsuits outside. They had superman logos on their suits. Pretty stylish, I thought and showed it to one of the colleagues.
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During the night, got the feeling that it had finished building. Woke up and it was true. Typed install .. facepalm .. it caused a full rebuild. Got no more 'notices' and woke up while it was still building.
Put on the headphones to listen to music. This stimulated the bindu point at the back of the head and something cool started trickling down to the throat. That familiar feeling, that familiar taste.
Cupped in at the throat and now it seems to have started emitting heat.
Wednesday, November 7, 2012
Heavy healing
Recently, all sorts of psychic heat topics have spawned on the forums.
Yesterday, I felt my back being at dis-ease. Practised keeping focus on a certain point in the spine.
Went to bed early, intending to be refreshed for the morning drive.
The chest started to hurt. A lot. Could perhaps sleep for 3-4 hours and spent the rest of the time healing. After several hours of healing, it was finally possible to self-diagnose it. Caught cold 3 days ago. It was raining pretty seriously on Monday and it was windy as well, so I got soaked and then blown through.
Actually I was amazed that today I felt more refreshed than a few days ago.
Now there's motivation for integrating some of that practice into the daily life again. Need it to keep this body alive.
Yesterday, I felt my back being at dis-ease. Practised keeping focus on a certain point in the spine.
Went to bed early, intending to be refreshed for the morning drive.
The chest started to hurt. A lot. Could perhaps sleep for 3-4 hours and spent the rest of the time healing. After several hours of healing, it was finally possible to self-diagnose it. Caught cold 3 days ago. It was raining pretty seriously on Monday and it was windy as well, so I got soaked and then blown through.
Actually I was amazed that today I felt more refreshed than a few days ago.
Now there's motivation for integrating some of that practice into the daily life again. Need it to keep this body alive.
Friday, November 2, 2012
Dream, UFOs at the sea
Two nights ago, I had multiple dreams, all of them relaying the same idea. We were sneaking into some sort of a building with a lot of security around. Though, for some reason, there didn't seem to be any reason for us to be sneaking - everyone welcomed us as equals. This was probably induced by playing Fallout 2 and sneaking past the geckos, only to realize they wouldn't attack me anyway.
Slept most of the night in a half-meditative pose last night, which made me feel really good. Really enjoyed sleeping, thanks to this.
Had a couple of interesting dreams.
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Visited some sort of a museum (haven't seen any quite like it). I guess it was in the same town, an old library building. The museum had been built into the attic. The floor was uneven, but everything else looked pretty clean and new.
Expected to see a lot of books there, but there were only a few. Couldn't spot any secret ones on the shelves there, just old books. Instead, there were honeycomb-like structures with some rather strange skulls and bones. "Some really weird species of bees," I thought. More strange-looking and completely foreign objects, which I can't remember. While trying to remember more details, I get the feeling that there was something related to Egypt, aliens and non-mainstream electronic devices.
Sometimes I would want to ask from the guide, but she .. well, walked away while talking about the exhibitions. I thought she just went back to her room or something. That wasn't of too much help, though.
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Woke up, checked the clock (postponing it by 30 min) and dreamt on.
There's this other guy (I guess), who has been accompanying me in the last 10+ dreams (or more). I guess he might be one from the group, whom I had had to obey a while back. Anyway, he seems calm and well-behaved, but somewhat passive (mostly just observing). Also, he has never spoken anything so far, only occasional empathy.
This time, however, something happened and he showed it to me.
We were at the sea, on top of some sort of a watchtower or something (just a few meters high). It looked like summer, sky was almost clear, with some thin clouds drifting about. Sea was rather calm, mild wind. A familiar coastline with familiar trees, plants and stones, but a foreign place.
Suddenly, a white pillar appeared at the sea, causing a bunch of waves to propagate from there. That's what he wanted to show me. He was wondering what it was.
Decided to go there and take a look (couldn't hurt, since I knew I didn't have the body with me anyway). Knowing that I didn't have much time left before the alarm, I just teleported there, trying to stay on the plane and avoid drifting away from the dream. It was maybe just 10 meters deep, the object must've been rather small, a few meters wide.
Once there, I was overwhelmed with a vibration. The vibration had obviously been designed to keep unwanted visitors away. Got an overlay of the signal, which was high-pitch peaks at a regular interval. Teleported back, relaying the info to the friend.
Soon, a smaller metallic-looking UFO appeared at my 5, above the woods. Again, he spotted it first. It flew in the direction of the object in the sea. Soon after, a whole fleet of bigger disc-shaped UFOs came from over the woods. These flew over us, in the same direction. A couple of more UFOs came in. Started waving at them, saying "Hi there, friends!" and intending for them to land next to us. One of the discs landed and a small Gray appeared. Jumped down over the edge of the watchtower, to look at them and have a chat. Halfway down, alarm rang and dream ended.
Actually, I was quite puzzled. Had thought Grays would be taller.
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Remembered that sometime in the morning, I woke up because someone knocked on my room door (would be rather absurd). Slept on.
Slept most of the night in a half-meditative pose last night, which made me feel really good. Really enjoyed sleeping, thanks to this.
Had a couple of interesting dreams.
---------------------------------------
Visited some sort of a museum (haven't seen any quite like it). I guess it was in the same town, an old library building. The museum had been built into the attic. The floor was uneven, but everything else looked pretty clean and new.
Expected to see a lot of books there, but there were only a few. Couldn't spot any secret ones on the shelves there, just old books. Instead, there were honeycomb-like structures with some rather strange skulls and bones. "Some really weird species of bees," I thought. More strange-looking and completely foreign objects, which I can't remember. While trying to remember more details, I get the feeling that there was something related to Egypt, aliens and non-mainstream electronic devices.
Sometimes I would want to ask from the guide, but she .. well, walked away while talking about the exhibitions. I thought she just went back to her room or something. That wasn't of too much help, though.
---------------------------------------
Woke up, checked the clock (postponing it by 30 min) and dreamt on.
There's this other guy (I guess), who has been accompanying me in the last 10+ dreams (or more). I guess he might be one from the group, whom I had had to obey a while back. Anyway, he seems calm and well-behaved, but somewhat passive (mostly just observing). Also, he has never spoken anything so far, only occasional empathy.
This time, however, something happened and he showed it to me.
We were at the sea, on top of some sort of a watchtower or something (just a few meters high). It looked like summer, sky was almost clear, with some thin clouds drifting about. Sea was rather calm, mild wind. A familiar coastline with familiar trees, plants and stones, but a foreign place.
Suddenly, a white pillar appeared at the sea, causing a bunch of waves to propagate from there. That's what he wanted to show me. He was wondering what it was.
Decided to go there and take a look (couldn't hurt, since I knew I didn't have the body with me anyway). Knowing that I didn't have much time left before the alarm, I just teleported there, trying to stay on the plane and avoid drifting away from the dream. It was maybe just 10 meters deep, the object must've been rather small, a few meters wide.
Once there, I was overwhelmed with a vibration. The vibration had obviously been designed to keep unwanted visitors away. Got an overlay of the signal, which was high-pitch peaks at a regular interval. Teleported back, relaying the info to the friend.
Soon, a smaller metallic-looking UFO appeared at my 5, above the woods. Again, he spotted it first. It flew in the direction of the object in the sea. Soon after, a whole fleet of bigger disc-shaped UFOs came from over the woods. These flew over us, in the same direction. A couple of more UFOs came in. Started waving at them, saying "Hi there, friends!" and intending for them to land next to us. One of the discs landed and a small Gray appeared. Jumped down over the edge of the watchtower, to look at them and have a chat. Halfway down, alarm rang and dream ended.
Actually, I was quite puzzled. Had thought Grays would be taller.
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Remembered that sometime in the morning, I woke up because someone knocked on my room door (would be rather absurd). Slept on.
Thursday, November 1, 2012
Burst of ego
Too much power and ego. A burst of anger with some other emotions today morning. Interesting.. haven't felt that for quite a while.
Also found it interesting that I was sort of notified about it beforehand. Replied in the mind: "Shall be able to cope with it pretty soon."
Need to work on control over emotions. This time, the approach is a bit different (won't judge it, shall just take it into account). Another difference in the approach - there are no goals, no deadlines .. shall just evolve .. always.
Also found it interesting that I was sort of notified about it beforehand. Replied in the mind: "Shall be able to cope with it pretty soon."
Need to work on control over emotions. This time, the approach is a bit different (won't judge it, shall just take it into account). Another difference in the approach - there are no goals, no deadlines .. shall just evolve .. always.
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