Exploring..

One of the Spanish visitors analyzed me today. She said that to her I looked like a shy little boy with a big heart, who would lock unpleasant feelings and emotions deep inside. Although I've heard it a lot, I haven't really thought about it this way before.

The silence has improved and with little effort, subtle vibrations can be felt in the body. It was interesting to run home and observe the changes in the vibration.

Meditated on the analysis a little. Explored some more and meditated on what was uncovered. Everything had that stench, the stench of uncertainty and self-denial. Sometimes I would see the ego being too arrogant .. looking down on others. Then I would shackle it and force it smaller, which would turn it all into a mess (wouldn't even be able to talk properly afterwards .. difficult to find the correct terms).

Moved the old stuff aside and visualized a flower next to it. A flower that would eventually grow past the old construction. Instead of the construction, focus would now lie on the flower near the heart chakra.

Found an old vision or flashback while exploring. We had been walking on the street in the capital at night, when it occurred. In the flashback, I think I was driving around, exploring some place. We arrived at a place with a lot of hay on the ground (some on the road, even). Remember faint yellow light and intense white light that appeared also. I guess there were other people there, too. Everything felt strongly spiritual and somehow it felt related to Christ.

Should focus more on the throat chakra as well. Though, have to be careful.. that arrogance has me cautious.