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The goal of this blog is to motivate myself and others for further practice as well as provide details that might explain what's going on..


Sunday, April 5, 2015

Acting

A couple of evenings ago I moved a little before bed. Noticed how the movements opened the 3rd eye so that I could see the surroundings quite clearly in the dark, with my eyes closed.

Took a nap a couple of days ago and found myself in city in a foreign country. It was a sunset there and I really enjoyed the way the sun lit the buildings, reflected off the windows and so on.. Very pretty, but when I tried to take photos of it, I couldn't get it all in view (too narrow FOV).

Last night I had three dreams. Two of them were classic:
  1. Snuck, climbed and flew around in what I thought was a ship.
  2. Tough real-time strategy without save, load or undo. (means I'm fighting against external influence - this time it was a cold draft)
    1. This time I actually won.
The last one was interesting:

A group of us disembarked from a ship. It was a group of islands that had just recently (a few years ago) surfaced from the ocean. The islands were unstable and could become submerged any time. Due to the lack of certainty, only rich people could afford houses there (for them it wouldn't matter if they lost a house or two). It was really pretty there .. wild nature. However, the whole place felt very powerful and there was constantly a strong wind so that one could not talk to one another, unless they were both shouting. We walked around very carefully, to avoid disturbing the environment that was so powerful it might've caused serious injuries if one of us were to misbehave. A horse fly landed on my finger. I tried to shake it off, while trying to remain focused on emitting unconditional love and compassion towards it. Somehow eventually managed to free myself. There were some sort of pillars or posts or something, which contained information. We carefully extracted only the information that we needed, making sure we wouldn't trigger anything dangerous.


I picked a random bus back home and somehow it happened that Hyena also took the same bus. Interesting chat for hours. At some moment, he triggered a realization. I expressed one of my principles I've taken for this life. He asked if I was just acting it or if I had really taken such a principle to limit myself. He also said "If you're acting it, then that's cool .. go ahead!" I couldn't help but laugh .. he was spot-on. For most of the time, this life has been a performance and it still is. In my opinion, there's no other way to live in this society than to have a mask behind a mask. I have decided to play along, trying my best to follow all the rules of the society just because I'm sure I can, even though I don't really belong into this society.

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