Embarrassment

It seems people are at a loss as to how to refer to me. Yesterday an old friend addressed me "your greatness". I answered "pff =D". He then replied "Oh, ok, your debility", which I also found a bit strange =D. Or maybe it's not strange at all. I don't know what or how to think about myself either. On the other hand, by acting without thinking about it today I behaved quite weird.

Last night I sought for more of old karmic traces and focusing in on them and staring at them. Given enough time, they transformed into heat. A lot of heat was produced and a lot of psi travelled up the spine.

While in astral or something, I focused consciousness at a region below the feet. This caused me to leak psi.

Had strange dreams.

In one of them, there was a foreign lecturer on some subject. Sat next to a friend, eager to listen to the lecturer. Felt tired. A colleague comes and somehow manages to sit on me. I considered it uncomfortable and pulled myself away. Looked for another place to sit, feeling embarrassed.

Realized that my stuff is still on the table. This was another table, which indicated that I had initially been sitting somewhere else. Thus, I had occupied the chair of someone else. The table with my stuff on it didn't feel mine. I guess someone had occupied the table or something, so I felt embarrassed for having my stuff laying on someone else's table.

While I was putting my stuff (books and .. playing cards??!??) into a bag to move somewhere else, I suddenly found myself at a girl's desk, putting her cards into my bag. Apologized and started putting her cards back on her desk, wondering how I even got into such an embarrassing situation.

Well, when I think back to me behaving weird today, this dream describes the situation the best. Entered a car over a pulled-down seat. Could've pulled the seat up first .. no, I ignored that, thinking I would be able to step over. Messed up and heavily leaned my back against a pretty girl sitting next to me, in order to pull my tangled boots out. Embarrassing.. The consequences of a simple mistake as simple as not pulling the seat back up before stepping into a car.