Jogged past birch-shack

Sexual energy had been berserk for several days. Couldn't sleep last night, spent almost the whole night, trying to untie the knot of yang with the help of yin. Little by little there was some effect. Today I tried to tap it and I think I got a bit of it, then I let the rest leak. Usually I've tried to tap it by focusing in the head (yang), intending to attract the energy .. that has not worked. Today I tried the opposite, I rested my attention in the head (yin) .. worked better.

Read some Castaneda, had an urge to jog. So, took a jog and while running random trails, I found an interesting spot in the woods. It looked as if someone had cut birch and connected the logs together, in order to make a hut. On top of one of the posts, there was a beer bottle. There was no trail to that place, nor any trail back. Stretched there and continued. A couple of more places that seemed interesting. A cuckoo was singing on top of a tree, circled around it. Then there was a tree that was grinding against another tree in the wind. Took a sharp angle turn from there. Focused on being lightweight and inspired by the surroundings. It was an act, but it helped to avoid exhausting myself with thoughts while running.

Again .. amazed at Castaneda's books.

After the tonal shrinks, the warrior is closing the gate from the other side. As long as his tonal is unchallenged and his eyes are tuned only for the tonal's world, the warrior is on the safe side of the fence. He's on familiar ground and knows all the rules. But when his tonal shrinks, he is on the windy side, and that opening must be shut tight immediately, or he would be swept away. And this is not just a way of talking. Beyond the gate of the tonal's eyes the wind rages. I mean a real wind. No metaphor. A wind that can blow one's life away. In fact, that is the wind that blows all living things on this earth.

Hmm.. I wonder if that's what I've called the astral wind? Like in those dreams where there's a loud storm outside and I go from building to building, crossing the wind but never staying in the wind for too long [1]. Also a long time ago in an OBE where I formed an infinity symbol out of the cloud of consciousness .. I broke it when the wind had amplified and become so strong that it was close to my limits [2].